Story from the Asia front

[EdnaMarie]

So as many of you know I live in Asia in a country where EC is the norm. I tutor the neighbour boy in English for free for a couple of hours every other day. As usual DD is with me, on the lap, on her tummy, with the neighbour, whatever. I often have her in CDs but I'm trying to break that habit and go just nakey-butt or in clothes at home. It's been going okay EXCEPT for when I have my own language lessons or give lessons... basically when my focus is on other people and not on DD.

Well I think that's pretty normal... as she gets more vocal and mobile I'm hoping we will manage to get more noticeable signals.

So anyway there I am tutoring him, we're going over compound verbs using the verb "to get", and DD starts blowing bubbles loudly. We both laugh and say something stupid, I don't know, like, "Oh, yes, do you also want TO GET UP?"

About a minute later she pees. Ooops. I'm sure if I'd been alone I'd have caught it. The neighbour boy (who is, as you will recall, familiar with EC as a part of life) says, "She was telling us when she was blowing her bubbles but we didn't listen to her."

Well there you go. He was right, of course.

I feel very lucky to be in this supportive environment.

[granolalight]

Hm. Yet another kind of cue to look for! I find that I am most successful w/ EC b/c of timing and intuition instead of reading DS's cues. Maybe it's just me. But I find his cues (whatever they are!) to be barely perceptible. That would be so neat to be living in a culture where EC is the norm.

Thanks for sharing.

[EdnaMarie]

Well me too... I thought it was so interesting was that even 15 year old boy here can EC a baby. Heh. If only people back home knew...

I'm not sure if it was so much the bubbles as her trying to make some kind of noise, trying to get our attention that he meant was her "signal". I just love how people respect kids here. They call babies "grandmother" and "grandfather" meaning, "I respect you like I respect my own grandparents". Love it. My mother-in-law calls my DD "dearest grandmother". How sweet is that!

[Margarita26]

that is so cool..im amazed. i wish our culture was like that.

[2 in August]

Very cool! That most be an awesome environment to be in. Around here I feel like I'm really going to be an outcast when people start finding out that I'm ecing with my ds.

[EdnaMarie]

That's how I'm going to feel when I have to face my whole family in the U.S. We're taking a big trip to the United States in the spring... it's going to be interesting as I'm hoping to go diaper-free by that time.

[ddschlr]

I have just been thinking about what it would be like to EC where it was the cultural norm. I wonder if I would have done it differently or have different expectations.

What is the age expectation for using the potty independently? Are the children dressed in a way that helps them to be independent or are they naked at home? My ds is just two. He tells us when to take him, but he can't take his clothes or underwear off himself. Just curious about it.

[lexmas]

"She was telling us when she was blowing her bubbles but we didn't listen to her."

Aww, what a sweet story, it IS truly wonderful that you can do this in such a supportive environment! Lucky you! How I only wish people here respected what our babies can communicate with us that way!

[Vortexing]

ooooo, will you ask that little boy what to do when they get mobile and start to pee over in corners, under the table, etc??? That's really cool that you have such awesome support... me on the other hand, my MIL keeps telling me all this Freudian garbage about how potty training her so early will leave her emotionally scarred. : Talk about different environments huh?

Do tell us more when you get a chance!!! I'm excited to keep hearing about how it's REALLY done.

[EdnaMarie]

"What is the age expectation for using the potty independently?"

Around 2.5 / 3 if they live in an apartment and have to use the big people's toilet. Little boys have an advantage as they pee in trashcans, out the windows, etc. ;-) It's hard for them to get on and off the toilet. I think for poops mommy helps the kids wipe until around 3 - 4 just to make sure it's really clean.

"Are the children dressed in a way that helps them to be independent or are they naked at home?"

They usually wear only pull-down pants or for the girls, dresses that can be easily lifted, with panties that can be easily pulled down. If mom is super busy and there aren't guests, sometimes the child goes nakey-butt but only in the summer. It's a continental climate in a mountainous country so total nakedness is not an option for at least 6 months out of the year.

"ooooo, will you ask that little boy what to do when they get mobile and start to pee over in corners, under the table, etc???"

I think they just live with it and tell the kid not to. It's not a totally gentle-discipline culture: around 2, they scold a child who has an "intentional accident," i.e. if he goes and picks out a place to pee or poop which is not the set place. Some parents use spanking though this is a minority. For most though they just see that both their parents are unhappy and that's enough for them to slowly phase it out.

[Vortexing]

Cool!!!