Family! UGH! (rant)

[mamadelbosque]

So, don't get me wrong, I love my family. My parents are great, my brother and I get along these days, my grandparents (on dads side) are awesome. But, they're also incredibly obnoxious right now.

If I (or DH) tell my dad, grandparents, brother, anyone that my back is sore, or that I'm not feeling good one day, then for the next week I *will* be getting phone calls along the lines of "are you ok? I heard your back was sore...". Its soo obnoxious. I mean, sure its nice to know that they care, but I don't need/want to be questioned about my health every f'ing day! If I feel like shit and want them to know, then I'll tell them. They don't need to f'ing ask everytime I/they call 'are you ok, I heard X hurt...' its really not neccasriy! And, I feel like its an invasion of my privacy - I've taken to answering "I'm fine" universally, whether my back is hurting like crazy or I feel like I'm going to puke, or whatever. I just don't want to f'ing hear about it for the next week! I hate lying to them all but its just not cool! http://www.mothering.com/discussions...lies/irked.gif

Anyhow, does anyone else have this problem? And if so, how do you deal with it... and in anycase, sorry about the rant... just needed to vent

[Jacob'smommy]

I think alot of us are going through the same thing now.

I just complain to DH, venting helps so much. Sometimes, if it's my mom who is freaking out, and I can't calm her down, I just ask my older sis or DH to talk to mom and see if they can get her to relax. I've done the I'm fine thing too, or sometimes I'll crack jokes, or just try to get them to relax.

[SaraC]

I just remind my family that I am fine and if anything changes they will be the first to know. My mom in particular freaks out some especially if I mention that my feet are swollen. I don't know why it is that particular thing that really gets her worrying but I am like 37 weeks pregnant. Aren't my feet supposed to swell if I have been out shopping all day? It drives me batty but I try to laugh it off. Maybe you can just do the same. It will be over soon and then they can bug you about how the baby is doing/feeling

[LydiaJW]

I just got my first "are you still pregnant?" phone call today at 37 wks 5 days...ugh. No, I've had this baby for 2 weeks and not told any of you, wth? My biggest problem with family right now is the fact that DH's parents want to make the 10 hour trip as SOON as they get the phone call and visit for a week. I am trying so hard to get DH to see that I REALLY need a babymoon this time around...with 3 kids I need some time to get adjusted and just RELAX!!

So anyway, although its different...I hear you on the family stuff. I'm sorry girl!!!

[bemommy]

I hate to say it. . but I'm a bit jealous. Sure the people I see regularly ask me how I'm doing/feeling. . the people like the teachers and other parents at my DD's preschool. But I've got no one else calling me, or emailing me asking how I am. Makes me really happy with the town we live in (almost strangers asking how I am and offering to help) not so great about my family.

[lunabelly]

Yeah, I don't have the family problem at all. Most of them aren't even aware that I'm pregnant. Kind of sad. I did have the thing where the ils wanted to come two seconds after the baby's born. Luckily we talked them out of it, and they're coming in August.

[cinnamonamon]

Ugh -- when I thought I *might,* possibly be in labor last week, I called my sister to see why mom wasn't answering her phone -- well, she was at church. NO problem, I'll call her later (the plan is to go to mom's as she's 15 minutes from the birth center & I'm 1 1/2 hours), before I leave.

15 minutes later I get the "are you okay, what's going on?!" call from my mom. Turns out my sister called the church & interrupted the Ash Wednesday service to have my mom immediately call me back. :

For 4 days after that I got at least 3 calls per day from family (who don't normally call on a regular basis) and the first words out of their mouths were "so what's happening -- how are you doing?"

*rips hair out* I only barely contained myself... thankfully dh intercepted one of the calls from my mom & she thought to ask if all the phone calls were bugging me, so he was able to tell her (I have the psycho pregnant woman lack of tact thing going on, and didn't want to subject them to that, so I'd been just avoiding & "making nice").

Now the rule is they can call, but they can't ask any irritating questions -- it isn't as if I won't be whining about the prodomal labor thing in point five seconds anyway -- just don't force the issue & be nosy by asking! I still want to yell, "if you want to show you care, come play with my kids or clean my house!" My younger sisters are a bit scared of me right now though, I guess...my psycho-ness is not normal for me...

Gee, I'm tonight.