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Let's get the comebacks rollin'!

post #1 of 70
3/1/07 at 4:25pm
Thread Starter 
So I was laying here last night thinking about my mom (she wants to take me shopping) and realized the slew of questions that is to come.

I know for a fact it bugs her I won't give her a due date. Yes I have an idea when it would be but no I am not sharing it. She sent me five different emails pretending that I hadn't answered her in each and every one rephrasing it but still asking, "When is your due date?" She has issues with the way I want to birth so that'll come up as will gender and names (I don't want to share this time...she asked if we had ones yet when I had barely peed positive).

I thought it might be fun to get a list going that we can add to. Especially as we all get farther along and the innane questions really start in earnest.

When is your due date?
I'm pretty sure it'll be on the baby/ies birthday. I'm not positive though so let me get back to you.

What are you having? Do you know what the gender is? (for those not finding out)
I'm pretty sure I'm having a baby. Although DH's background is questionable so I guess we'll have to wait and see!

Are you dilating yet?
I'm not sure...could you do me a favour and stick your head up there and take a look around.

Did your dr. say you could do that?
You know what! I forgot to ask. Gee silly me, thinking pregnancy included decision making skills.

Ok that's all I got for now. Keep adding them! This should be fun!
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post #2 of 70
3/1/07 at 4:36pm
We need one for "What are you hoping for?" meaning boy or girl. I always say "A Baby, cause our landlord won't let us have a dog."
post #3 of 70
3/1/07 at 4:40pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by artgoddess View Post
We need one for "What are you hoping for?" meaning boy or girl. I always say "A Baby, cause our landlord won't let us have a dog."
: OMG! I love that!!! I think I may use that one. I've been asked a dozen times.

Oh! For all us young mamas:
Are you trying to have your babies young to get it out of the way? :
I need something for this. I'm 20. I got married at 18, had DD at 19 and this one will be born at 21. I am so tired of being asked if I'm trying to just get it out of the way! I had a friend the other night who insisted that was what we were doing especially since this may be our last. She thinks I'm totally crazy for doing all of this (getting married and having babies) "so young". BITE ME!
post #4 of 70
3/1/07 at 4:49pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by OtherMother'n'Madre View Post
So I was laying here last night thinking about my mom (she wants to take me shopping) and realized the slew of questions that is to come.

I know for a fact it bugs her I won't give her a due date. Yes I have an idea when it would be but no I am not sharing it. She sent me five different emails pretending that I hadn't answered her in each and every one rephrasing it but still asking, "When is your due date?" She has issues with the way I want to birth so that'll come up as will gender and names (I don't want to share this time...she asked if we had ones yet when I had barely peed positive).

I thought it might be fun to get a list going that we can add to. Especially as we all get farther along and the innane questions really start in earnest.

When is your due date?
I'm pretty sure it'll be on the baby/ies birthday. I'm not positive though so let me get back to you.

What are you having? Do you know what the gender is? (for those not finding out)
I'm pretty sure I'm having a baby. Although DH's background is questionable so I guess we'll have to wait and see!

Are you dilating yet?
I'm not sure...could you do me a favour and stick your head up there and take a look around.

Did your dr. say you could do that?
You know what! I forgot to ask. Gee silly me, thinking pregnancy included decision making skills.

Ok that's all I got for now. Keep adding them! This should be fun!
For the gender question I always tell them I don't care about gender I only care if it has both of its kidneys. DH only has one.

I don't know if anyone ever asked me if I was dialating. That is kind of weird.
post #5 of 70
3/1/07 at 5:28pm
Thread Starter 
My mom used to ask. I finally told her and you know what she says to me?

"How do you know though? It's not like you are going to a dr."

Gee, it's rocket science to feel that one out.
post #6 of 70
3/1/07 at 5:45pm
I'm showing early this time, so I've already gotten "Are you sure there's only one baby?" :

Anyone have a snappy comeback for that one? I mean, other than kicking the questioner in the shin
post #7 of 70
3/1/07 at 5:48pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by OtherMother'n'Madre View Post
What are you having? (for those not finding out)
A puppy.

A troll- they're sooo cute!

Triplets.

-Angela
post #8 of 70
3/1/07 at 6:40pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by jandj+1 View Post
I'm showing early this time, so I've already gotten "Are you sure there's only one baby?" :

Anyone have a snappy comeback for that one? I mean, other than kicking the questioner in the shin
How about, "Yeah I think the other one stole your brain."
post #9 of 70
3/1/07 at 7:24pm
I am not good with snappy comebacks, but I am sure enjoying reading this thread .

How about an answer to what I get asked all the time....So you stopped nursing? Did the doctor say you could nurse? Well of course you will wean Lyni now, etc. you get the point. Grrrr. Like Lyni doesn't need to nurse just cuz she will be a big sister.:

up to this point my answer has been "when she stops" or "if nursing gives me pre-term contractions". Not really great answers, although certainly true.
post #10 of 70
3/1/07 at 7:26pm

TTC? curious or nosy?

Anyone else had people ask "Were you trying for a long time?"

I am 36, so perhaps that is why they ask, but it seems kind of a personal question to me. The funny thing is, we (very luckily) got pregnant literally the first month we tried. As a result I find it really difficult to answer this question without blushing, lying or feeling awkward.
post #11 of 70
3/1/07 at 7:37pm
gummibear, i get the same q. i'm 35.
post #12 of 70
3/1/07 at 7:45pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by gummibear View Post
Anyone else had people ask "Were you trying for a long time?"

I am 36, so perhaps that is why they ask, but it seems kind of a personal question to me. The funny thing is, we (very luckily) got pregnant literally the first month we tried. As a result I find it really difficult to answer this question without blushing, lying or feeling awkward.
That is a really rude question. It's no one's business. Although I have been saying "No we got pregnant the first month, DP is very proud of himself." If we want to have a snappy shut them up comeback we could say things like, "Oh no it was really easy, I'll tell you the secret. What you do is make sure your hand and knees when DP ejaculates and you sing the alphabet song while he spanks you. It works to get you pregnant every time I swear."
post #13 of 70
3/1/07 at 7:50pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by gummibear View Post
Anyone else had people ask "Were you trying for a long time?"

I am 36, so perhaps that is why they ask, but it seems kind of a personal question to me. The funny thing is, we (very luckily) got pregnant literally the first month we tried. As a result I find it really difficult to answer this question without blushing, lying or feeling awkward.
How about "If you include the dinner and movie we tried for about 4 hours".
post #14 of 70
3/1/07 at 7:56pm
Thread Starter 
Ugh! I get asked, "So was it planned?" No it wasn't but honestly why is that any of your business! I had a friend ask the other day and I was honest with her. She then went on to ask, "So what you guys just didn't use protection? I know you chart but that's not really birth control." (This is the same girl in the post above )

I think I am going to make up a shirt that says, "If you think your question may be met with hostility, please don't ask it. If you aren't sure, please don't ask it. If you do don't be surprised at the reaction."

If someone asks if it took long you could tell them that no it hadn't. After all prgnancy is like the flu...you just had DH cough on you.
post #15 of 70
3/1/07 at 7:57pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by lyttlewon View Post
How about "If you include the dinner and movie we tried for about 4 hours".
:
post #16 of 70
3/1/07 at 8:17pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by OtherMother'n'Madre View Post
Oh! For all us young mamas:
Are you trying to have your babies young to get it out of the way? :
I need something for this. I'm 20. I got married at 18, had DD at 19 and this one will be born at 21. I am so tired of being asked if I'm trying to just get it out of the way! I had a friend the other night who insisted that was what we were doing especially since this may be our last. She thinks I'm totally crazy for doing all of this (getting married and having babies) "so young". BITE ME!
Tell them that you are right on track to get to your goal of 13 children by the time you become infertile. Then say "if we get lucky and have twins or triplets, we might even be able to get to 16!" I'm not making fun of quiverfull mamas because I lean that way myself, but the mention of 13-16 kids should be enough to shock them into silence
post #17 of 70
3/1/07 at 8:18pm
Thread Starter 
Good idea! why is it no one asks those sort of things UNTIl you get pregnant. I swear pregnancy turns off peoples filtering device.
post #18 of 70
3/1/07 at 8:20pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by lyttlewon View Post
How about "If you include the dinner and movie we tried for about 4 hours".
oh that's a good one.
post #19 of 70
3/1/07 at 9:33pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by artgoddess View Post
"Oh no it was really easy, I'll tell you the secret. What you do is make sure your hand and knees when DP ejaculates and you sing the alphabet song while he spanks you. It works to get you pregnant every time I swear."
I now have a personal mission to use this at least once a day for the duration of my pregnancy. Love it!
post #20 of 70
3/1/07 at 9:36pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Let It Be View Post
I now have a personal mission to use this at least once a day for the duration of my pregnancy. Love it!
It would be even more effective if you add pantomime or demonstrations in there
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