Pushing--What's it like? - Page 2

[lunarmomma]

Yeah, the blood curdling screams that came out of me when I was pushing were nothing I ever knew I had in me!! I wasn't screaming because of pain, it was just a primal force that came out of me.
I had no control over it whatsoever...

[daylily]

I totally agree about the breathing, Sweetwater. My SIL is a Lamaze instructor and she was a doula to me for 2 of my births. It was great having a woman along to support me, but I got impatient with the breathing patterns. The second time, I escaped to the shower and stayed there, alone, until I was in transition. Lamaze was great for the women of the '60s who were being routinely anesthetized, but it seems a little old fashioned now(IMO).

Screaming: Wow! I'm glad I'm not the only screaming mama out there. I'll never forget the doctor telling me not to make so much noise when I was pushing out my third baby. I wish I'd have kicked him. During my fourth labor, my midwife was much more reassuring and told me it was normal to scream, but I felt a little disappointed in myself.
Edited to add that my Lamaze instructing SIL finally quit in despair. She was fed up with women asking "How far do I have to be dilated before I get my epidual?"

[bebe luna]

pushing...
I think that pushing is where it gets pretty darn painful!!!
I pushed soo hard- I was determined to get that baby out as quick as possible!! I pushed for 30 minutes.
It just seemed natural to me to push hard and consistantly. My midwife and doula kept saying to me that it was okay for me to take more and longer breaks between pushing sessions, but I just wanted the baby out!
I had no tearing or ripping and felt great after my son was born.
I think every womans birth experience is different- she has different needs, so does the baby.
Trust your body, your instincts, and the process of birth! You will do a great job!!

[cottonwood]

Making noise. Yeah. My first midwife was really put out that I wasn't behaving like one of the 'ladies' in Spiritual Midwifery. : She kept trying to convince me that growling, whimpering, swearing, yodeling, grimacing, etc., was just going to slow the process down. Unfortunately I thought she must know what she was talking about, after all she was the "expert", so I tried like hell to get myself under control. I am now really bitter about that, because I now know that raging through birth was what I needed to do to for it to progress normally. And how empowering and freeing it was once I figured out that my instinctual response to my labor was valid. No ladylike labor for me, thank you very much.

[Zoepie]

Well when I went into labor it wasnt that painful so my midwife told me I was in early labor. So when I started to push I thought I had to poop. SO I got on the toilet and started to push.. WHen I realized I was pushing for a baby not a poop I called my midwife to get there right away and had to 'resist' the urge to push for 30 min. From what I understand pushing is compared to 80 pounds of pressure pushing on your tummy. Now while pushing I grunted and yelled it wasnt because it was painful I feel as though I was releasing incredible amounts of pressure and energy and a nothing like a good yodle or scream to release tension and energy. It was the resiting that was uncomfortable. And towards the end I could resist anymore my husband started laying out the mats and pads and getting ready to deliver this baby himself.. LOL he looks so scared. So I have to agree with most the other moms that it feels like a very big very emotional poop. Well until the crowning then it burns
Michelle

Edit: I agree with bebe luna.. trust your instincts and go with the flow.. your body really does know what to do.

[2boys1girlsmom]

pusing baby out

Pushing for me was involuntary. I was hoping it would work out that way, that if I just let my body do its work, things would go the way they were supposed do, and that's what happened. It was as though I just couldn't NOT push. Her head was out in 2 pushes and the rest of her followed with the third. It was an amazing feeling after being numb for the births of my boys.

Oh, and regarding yelling and screaming, that was also involuntary. I think it helped too, even though after the fact I was a little concerned about what the neighbors might have thought!!!

[Milo]

Yeah, I've warned the people who will be assisting us that I don't swear, but I do get loud....and don't expect to be given a hard time about it. Definetly not "ladylike" in my experience...but very powerful.

I have experienced that "laborland trance" with both previous babies, and also found the breathing to be worthless.

[Wildflower]

I'm a little confused, or in awe, of my pushing experience...When I felt the urge until she was born was only 10 minutes and it felt like 2! Everyone said I pushed her out in 3 contractions, but my internal feeling was that I did not push it out, I did not think about or try to push at all! It was like she herself or my uterous did the whole thing automatically, completely independent of my will. You know, it really hurt, but only because I tore, not the pushing itself, but I think I'm really glad it went so fast...I had been drinking gallons of red raspberry (iced) tea in that last month and during labor, and this tea is renown for toning the uterus and just helping with labor in some mysterious (to me) way...but now I'm thinking that maybe my super-toned uterus was so strong it just pushed her out without me helping! It was miraculous! But I totally can't relate to these tales of hours of marathon pushing! My warm thoughts are with you for a beautiful birth! Remember you're a goddess, and you are one!

[marymary]

Oh, oh, oh, - I've had 2 drugfree vaginal births, no tears, my third is several months away, it's really good to hear that your uterus can just do it's thing. I've been putting labour thoughts to the back of my mind. I did feel that I pushed the baby(s) out, doesn't it feel like the most 'alone' time in the space/time continuum.That's not to say it's a bad feeling but there's no-one but you and your babe and I remember being struck by that the first time. We are incredibly lucky. My gran described it as that 'rolling' and it is just like the ocean. My second midwife said that some ladies were completely silent, others sang hymns and rubbed her arms, and the ones that looked like Princess Anne were the foulest-mouthed! Somebody, Was it Parismaman? said that the sun rose as she gave birth, With my first son, we were taken up to the 15th floor overlooking the river thames and Tower Bridge as a full moon rose! In spanish you say 'dar se luz' for birth, 'giving light', it's so wonderful, however it happens. Incidentally a woman I know gave birth without knowing she was pregnant (honest!) just goes to show there must be a big psychological coupling to the birth process, anyway, enjoy it, it's truly amazing, ah yes pushing, hmmmn, I'm not going to bother this time! Hopefully it'll all flow smoothly along x

[Britishmum]

Regarding the length of labour - put that out of your mind! I pushed for three hours and twenty minutes. (I ignored all the cheerleaders and told them that if they said 'good job' once more I'd hit someone)

When dd was finally born I looked at the clock and said 'Wow, that was quick, only twenty minutes!" Everyone was stunned that for me, the additional three hours just hadn't existed. After that I had a new lease of life, and wanted to eat, eat, eat, and eat some more.

Then I found out that while I was in labour, Dh had eaten the bar of English chocolate I'd saved for this moment. I have never quite forgiven him.......!!!

[clover]

I don't have time to read all of the posts so forgive me if I repeat what others have said. This is my experience. When It came time to push it was awhole different thing than the labor before. The contractions really spaced out. I definately had no choice but to push. The contractions came and my body took over. forgive me if it sounds crude but it is like having a very intense bowel movement. ya know if you don't push your body will just push for you. I pushed for a very very long time, I had a big baby 9.8lbs with a huge head!!!! so I was very tired at the end and really needed the support of my partner I think I really wrenched his back pulling on him for strength to push, but it was the better part of labor for me. Hope this anserws your questions and goodluck!

[serenetabbie]

Ummmm...okay. With ds it was a long, slow affair. He had his hand up on his head and got "caught" up in there for a bit, so I think that made it a little more painfull than it needed to be. I pushed for 2.5 hours with him...almost had an assisted birth! The way I described labor and pushing to a friend right after he was born was "like lightning...very hot feeling". In retrospect I said it felt like the sort of abdominal cramping you get with diarreah. With ds it was all so fast...I was in labor for about 5 hours or less...threw up and pushed her out 15 minutes later! Her labor never got worse that feeling of bad menstral cramps or gas. I had no classes as my midwife assured me I would be able to do it when the time came. I agree with the "rolling ocean" anaology. I found it helped to scream...But I am a vocal person no matter what! My doula w/dd really helped a lot by telling me to make "low growling noises"....it wastes less energy. Pushing really is a huge relief...you know the end is near and your body just takes over! For me crowning hurt the most...that felt like someone lit my bottom on fire! But it lasts only for a moment and then that baby comes sliding out!!! Good luck and speedy delivery!

[marymary]

serenetabbie, thanks for reminding me that crowning only lasts a 'minute' .

with ds1 the midwife said to 'push down into your bottom', DON'T! I'm sure that gave me piles, with ds2 I was able to focus on my diaphragm amd push down through the muscles as if they were a brick wall and that way I really felt like I got on top of the baby and helped him out, 3 almighty pushes later. There is something rather odd about straining to such a degree I agree and really hope that things will be even better this third time. Good luck ít's still the most wonderful thing there is.MM

I'd just like to add a lovely thing my best friend, mother of 3 said to me when I was pregnant with my first, that 'if it was that bad women wouldn't do it twice'.

[lunarmomma]

Check out "Isabellas waterbirth story" in the Homebirth forum,
It is a long, but wonderful birth story and has excellent detail of all the pushing potential...