How do you relax?

[jkg]

For those of you who have had your babes already and those who are ready...how have you relaxed into your "labor space"? I am due a week from today. I don't really care if he comes late or early, I'm just excited to meet him. But I can't seem to fight off the stresses of other people in my life. I know that sounds terribly uncompassionate, and that's not how I mean it at all. I care about all of these people, but their stress and worry over my labor and so forth really just puts me in a bad mental place right now. Every time I look even a bit tired (and I've been exhausted lately), my Mom starts worrying that something terrible is wrong with the baby. MIL has been calling SEVERAL times a day asking if I'm in labor.: DH is having panic attacks again. In his case at least, I know he is worried about when and how it will all happen. He's been to the dr. 3 times in February, once for a stress test! I just wish everyone could have some faith in me and the whole process. I've already successfully birthed one child. I know that everyone else's issues are related to more than just ME, and that they only do it because they care about me, but I just feel too "on edge" all of the time to actually relax into a state where my body could even think about starting to get ready for labor. Does anyone have any tips?

[Wild Flowers]

no tips, looking for some.
It seems that people all around me are freaking out also. Which I really don't understand as this is the THIRD child. I swear people feel the need to baby me this time. Last time, the week before I was due we were out and about doing everything. No one said anything about stopping when I was having contractions or trying to clean, this time I have people telling me to take it easy. I don't understand it.

[MrsTC]

If other people are causing you stress because you're absorbing their anxious energy, I say avoid them or ask them to chill out when they're around you because they're doing more harm than good by fussing over you. I can't take being around some people these days and I've put it on myself that I just need some time to be alone and enjoy peaceful quiet time before baby comes, so I warn them not to expect me to be very social. So far it's working. I don't answer the phone, we don't attend some social gatherings, etc. I did the same thing the last time around and people got over it if they were offended by my seclusion.

[kerikadi]

Don't answer the phone. When DH gets home from work have him call his Mom, you shouldn't have to deal with her.
Every night dim the lights, listen to soothing music, light candles and go over your affirmations and mantras.

Good luck,
Keri

[risen_joy]

I'm with what Keri says!!

Unfortunately for me I'm stressing myself out trying to get everything done and perfect for when the baby comes! : How does one avoid oneself?? :

Just try to stay happy and do things that make you happy/relaxed! Don't feel obligated to others - YOU ARE HAVING A BABY and SO deserve whatever you need right now!!

[bongoblue]

Interesting thread, very pertinent to my day. I have had some family issues that have come up in the last week that are really messing with my positive vibe. I am just trying to stay away from voice mail and e-mail, keep doing my nightly routine of listening to relaxing CDs, and I'm adding a nightly tubtime. (Baths are truly a rare indulgence for me.) I'm trying not to worry that my worries will delay the onset of labor.

Since most people don't respond well to even a nicely stated request to chill, maybe the best tactic is avoidance. If people get annoyed, well, tough!

Good luck!

[jkg]

Originally Posted by bongoblue

Since most people don't respond well to even a nicely stated request to chill, maybe the best tactic is avoidance. If people get annoyed, well, tough!

Good luck!

I think that's about where I am at right now. It's 1:30 AM and I am awake, so tense. No ctx or anything like that...just this tension and anxiety. I am so mad at MIL. She upset DH in a big way today, and that, in turn, upsets me. It seems so cruel to just avoid someone, but I'm hoping that under the circumstances, avoidance is more compassionate than outright yelling at them. I had a talk with my own mom last night about how I need to be in a more peaceful state right now so if she could be more positive, and she responded very well to that request. So I feel very lucky for that. Now if I could just get some sleep...

[avaylee]

This is exactly the reason I'm thinking of actually taking time off from work the week before my due date. We've had a major shake-up and that puts me currently in charge of a team with a new hire (who needs training) coming this Friday. I'm start to worry about worrying! I don't want this little one to be unable to come out because every fiber of my being is clenched like a vice.

My best friend offered to get me a prenatal massage. Maybe that will have to be the thing I invest in so that I can let go of some of the stress. It's just a job, right? (right...??? grr...)

[Beth Ann]

Originally Posted by jkg

For those of you who have had your babes already and those who are ready...how have you relaxed into your "labor space"? I am due a week from today. I don't really care if he comes late or early, I'm just excited to meet him. But I can't seem to fight off the stresses of other people in my life. I know that sounds terribly uncompassionate, and that's not how I mean it at all. I care about all of these people, but their stress and worry over my labor and so forth really just puts me in a bad mental place right now. Every time I look even a bit tired (and I've been exhausted lately), my Mom starts worrying that something terrible is wrong with the baby. MIL has been calling SEVERAL times a day asking if I'm in labor.: DH is having panic attacks again. In his case at least, I know he is worried about when and how it will all happen. He's been to the dr. 3 times in February, once for a stress test! I just wish everyone could have some faith in me and the whole process. I've already successfully birthed one child. I know that everyone else's issues are related to more than just ME, and that they only do it because they care about me, but I just feel too "on edge" all of the time to actually relax into a state where my body could even think about starting to get ready for labor. Does anyone have any tips?

I have no real advice just wanted to say that can I relate with you. I am due in about 8 days and everyone seems to want to tell me there horrible labor stories. This is my first child so I am naturally a little scared.. so I wish people would just stop. :

[Arwyn]

To the OP and all those receiving pressure: I've only had a couple pseudo-casual "So, hi, how're things?" phone calls, few enough they're still amusing, but I can see it getting really old, really fast.

Originally Posted by avaylee

My best friend offered to get me a prenatal massage. Maybe that will have to be the thing I invest in so that I can let go of some of the stress.

DO IT!!!