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WEEKLY THREAD March 6-12 - Page 2

post #21 of 31
Just to clarify - I haven't gotten permission to UC at the hospital. I'm just going to do it. LOL I want a UC, my husband wants to be at the hospital. So, this is what we've come up with. We shall see how it turns out.
post #22 of 31
Emily, How do you guys feel about homebirth with a midwife? : that seems like a more reasonable compromise to me. I'd just be wary of having to gear up to be a super-bitch to get the birth you want, KWIM? It's not very conductive to good labor and it's more dificult when you've got oxytocin coursing through your veins making you more loving and trusting.
post #23 of 31
Quote:
Originally Posted by Synchro246 View Post
Emily, How do you guys feel about homebirth with a midwife? : that seems like a more reasonable compromise to me. I'd just be wary of having to gear up to be a super-bitch to get the birth you want, KWIM? It's not very conductive to good labor and it's more dificult when you've got oxytocin coursing through your veins making you more loving and trusting.
Or at least a doula along with you, so she can be the "bitch" and you can just concentrate on birthing?
post #24 of 31
I talked with a midwife-in-training. At first I wanted her to just be my UC backup, which she didn't want to do at first but is now considering. The weird part is the money. My insurance doesn't cover midwives, so we'd be paying out of pocket for that, which is about the same as my insurance deductible so if we did end up transferring to the hospital we'd basically be paying double. Seems simpler to just go to the hospital. I don't think I'll really have to be too bitchy - this is a small town with polite people. We haven't talked about it again since the other night, but I plan on discussing it in more detail with him about keeping a really open mind about staying home for as long as we're comfortable, etc. Anyway, I almost think it would be harder to have a UC with midwives (two would come) at home - they send a list of food for me to have for them, etc. It's a much more "friendly" thing and I honestly don't want a midwife at my birth anymore than I do a doctor. Probably doesn't make much sense, but those are my feelings about it! Plus, the midwife is two hours away and would want me to go for prenatals, which I'm unwilling to do. No doulas around here either. I plan to ask people to stay out of our room, and if they do come in, my husband will keep them away from me.

I drove on some really horrible dirt roads today, just me and my daughter, they were all slushy with some ice, etc. I was sliding around all over the place, it was kind of scary and of course the baby started moving around and made me think about how that was definitely about the worst place I could go into preterm labor! I was SO far away from everything - an hour away from my hometown TINY hospital and farther than that away from anything bigger too. I'm not at all afraid of preterm labor, but the situation made me think about it. My husband was about 30 minutes away by car, but he only had his snowmobile and would have had a really hard time finding me even if he did get someone to drive him. I could have called an ambulance and told them where I was, but they would have taken at least an hour. Pretty interesting!

I still haven't had a gender dream, which is so ironic since I had one with Delia but didn't believe in it and I was ready to completely believe in one this time around. One of my friends thinks I'm going to have a boy - so much so that last night someone came up to me and said "So, Emily, I hear you're going to have a boy!" LOL I said "Uh, news to me!" I guess she overheard the friend discussing it with another friend and thought it was fact.

I did have a dream where my skin was super thin and I could feel every part of the baby totally clearly and it was super cool but also freaky. It was all skinny.

My Mom and Me Pouch arrived today. And my MIL asked me if there's anything she can get me (FINALLY! ROFL). But I actually think I'm going to tell her to wait until after it's born since I can't really think of anything right now, other than stuff that I'd want to be gender-specific.

I'm happy because we're having a warm spell and all the snow is melting, so my husband won't be snowmobiling anymore, which will be nice. Have I showed you all the video of Delia on her tiny snowmobile? http://deliaquick.com/delia_kitty_cat_2.mov That girl is a daredevil! The standing up on the sled was her idea. Tonight she was touching the ceiling with her feet on her swing. The swing is on hooks on a beam, about 8" lower than the ceiling, so that's going higher than the height of the swing hooks!
post #25 of 31
Quote:
Originally Posted by emiLy View Post
I talked with a midwife-in-training. At first I wanted her to just be my UC backup, which she didn't want to do at first but is now considering. The weird part is the money. My insurance doesn't cover midwives, so we'd be paying out of pocket for that, which is about the same as my insurance deductible so if we did end up transferring to the hospital we'd basically be paying double. Seems simpler to just go to the hospital. I don't think I'll really have to be too bitchy - this is a small town with polite people.
. . .

I'm happy because we're having a warm spell and all the snow is melting, so my husband won't be snowmobiling anymore, which will be nice. Have I showed you all the video of Delia on her tiny snowmobile? http://deliaquick.com/delia_kitty_cat_2.mov That girl is a daredevil! The standing up on the sled was her idea. Tonight she was touching the ceiling with her feet on her swing. The swing is on hooks on a beam, about 8" lower than the ceiling, so that's going higher than the height of the swing hooks!
Maybe you can talk about your wishes with the staff somewhat ahead of time too

I LOVED snowmobiling when I was little. I never got to have a tiny one. sooooooooooooooo much fun!
post #26 of 31
Emily I'm curious too--so your ideal wish was for a UC/UP, but you're going to go to the hospital, kinda "at the last minute" after you've done a good chunk of your labor at home....? I'm asking because I am thinking about "backup options" as well. I really wish I could just live in the same area as my dear midwife-friend and have her attend my birth, because I trust her and I also know that she *totally* gets my longing for minimal interventions etc. Sigh... (ps if i'm hijacking the thread with this Q then just pm me please! )
post #27 of 31
That's the plan at the moment. I would love it if my husband was totally cool with it, and ended up not wanting to go to the hospital after all. The timing is pretty critical - I have to show up early enough to be laid back enough for them to leave me alone in the room to labor, but not so early that I'm there longer than I want to be. Plus, I just want to labor (and birth) at home so much more than I want to at the hospital. While it's nice having a plan we agree on, I'm getting a little mad that my husband gets this much say in where I give birth. I mean, we live across the street from the hospital... And we have to pay out of pocket for anything but a UC. And so much more than that!

How far away is your midwife friend? If that's what you really want, is there some way to make it work? The nearest midwives to me are two hours away. They charge $175 extra for the travel, but they do come up here.

I wanted to go to bed two hours ago... I know you have lots of other stuff to think about as far as UC - place, people, circumstances, etc. I would love for you to get what you want - the midwife friend with you, wherever you are.
post #28 of 31
This month of Mothering magazine has an article on having a homebirth at the hospital. Its a pretty amazing story since her baby was breech too.
post #29 of 31
all i really want is to be somewhere, anywhere, where I was safe and could have my DP and my midwife-friend with me. ideally I'd want my older kids around too, but they don't seem that interested or worried about the whole thing! You wouldn't think that'd be sooooooo effin complicated, but yeah. Having your own house is apparently a huge advantage when you're wanting to have a homebirth :

there's a birth center near my parents, and my midwife-friend could come with me perhaps as a doula or even just my friend...and of course DP and the kiddos could come too, but then there's still that pesky little problem of where we'd all go afterwards. Me and my kids are all welcome at my parent's anytime, but jeez is it too much to ask that I want my DP with me in the first few hours and days that we've had our first baby together?? : I don't think it's particularly fair of me to ask my ex that he clear off for awhile while all of us hole up at the house here...even tho I am fairly sure he would do that if it didn't look as if there would be any better option. However, that would still be a temp. fix. Regardless of the arrangements we end up having for the birth, if we don't have our own place before this baby comes, then we're still SOL : okay whine over. sry..
post #30 of 31
Quote:
Originally Posted by emiLy View Post
How far away is your midwife friend? If that's what you really want, is there some way to make it work? The nearest midwives to me are two hours away. They charge $175 extra for the travel, but they do come up here.
Anecdotally, my midwife traveled from the US to Germany to deliver her daughter's baby
post #31 of 31
Quote:
Originally Posted by Krystal323 View Post
Regardless of the arrangements we end up having for the birth, if we don't have our own place before this baby comes, then we're still SOL : okay whine over. sry..

What a big stressor.
I can't remember--are you looking to buy a home before the baby comes or find a decent rental?
(are you keeping up the Law of Attraction?)
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