Has anyone's DW done this?

[ErikaLeigh]

Amanda and I found out that she can induce lactation so that the she can bf too.

anyone else done this?

[lexbeach]

Here is a link to another thread on this same topic: "Two Mommies BF-ing?".

My dw was not interested in breastfeeding our kiddos. She did let our twins latch on a couple times as babies, and a few more times as toddlers, but she didn't like the way it felt.

I think it is a really cool idea.

I would urge anyone considering sharing the breastfeeding to be cautious, and to work hard to maintain the birth mother's full supply. I know one couple who decided that they would both breastfeed their twins--two moms, two babies--makes sense, right? The non-birth mom induced laction before the babies were born, and her milk came in wonderfully. They both shared the nursing of the babies pretty much right from the start, and couldn't imagine how any one woman could breastfeed twins. About six weeks later, the non-birth mom went back to work, and the birth-mom no longer had enough of a supply to breastfeed her babies on her own. They ended up giving up and switching to formula.

A non-birth mom can also comfort nurse the baby without inducing lactation. We have friends who have used an SNS or lactaid (supplemental nursing devices) with expressed breast milk from the birth mom. They use it the same way some moms use an occassional bottle of expressed milk, only the baby sucked on the non-birth mom's breasts instead of a bottle nipple.

HTH!

Lex

[osker]

While I haven't actually done this.. it is exactly what my wife and I are planning for once we finally get pregnant. I hope that you guys have great success! We're planning for DW to get pregnant and then I'll induce. I know that I'll be going back to school right away (I'm knee-deep in a five year program) and so we're planning for a lot of pumping to keep up supply. There's always the idea of inducing before the baby arrives so that you can store a bunch in the freezer too!

Good luck to you!

[chlaal]

I haven't, but I do know lesbian couples that have done this. I also know single moms who induced lactation in order to bf their adopted babies. It's definitely doable! Good luck!

-Joan

[mamastotwo]

We were going to do this with #2 but it was a stressful time and DP could get her supply going while my body thought i was having twins and we had more milk then we could handle. DP became what we called the pacifier boobie and DD loved it! Sometimes she would prefer pacifier boobie to milk boobie.

[ErikaLeigh]

Mamastotwo would you explain more?

Thanks for all of the replies. I am really glad to see that other ladies have found this joy. I would love for A to consider it, but I just don't see how she will.

For those who have, how hard was it to get the milk to come in?

[Emilie]

i think this is great!!!!

[ErikaLeigh]

thanks!

[lunadoula]

I have worked as a doula with mamas who have done this. My DW is not interested at all in BFing our child though.

I will say that the couples I have worked with who have had the best success/least frustration are when the non-birthing partner using the SNS with pumped breast milk from the birthing mom, and not focusing on actually inducing lactation (as LexBeach described). IMO and experience, I think a lot of moms honestly don't realize the time and energy (ongoing!) it will take to induce lactation, and how stressful the newborn period is anyways. The non-bio mom can still experience the closeness of nursing and the baby can get breastmilk this way, and she may even begin to produce a bit of milk of her own.

[Monkeygrrl]

my partner induced lactation to be able to help provide mm for our child...its a lot of work, but she felt like she was able to contribute something, which worked for her...

if you have any questions about it, feel free to email me privately...

peace...

[mamastotwo]

The pacifier boobie concept evolved for us. It definitely was easier after bf'ing DS first. With DD i kind of knew when she was looking for comfort nursing more than food. If DP was around she would do the comfort nursing and they both loved it. DD also was quick to tell us when she was looking for milk boobie. We got to a point where DP was "nursing" DD to sleep at night and also sometimes during the night.

[Phoenix_Rising]

my midwife and her partner did this. i think it is great. i have often wished that my wife would have done this but due to her medical issues (medications) it would not have been safe for baby. instead she did comfort nurse him for the first couple of months. she gave that up when he started getting upset there was no milk for him in those boobies.

[Frannyo]

We tried. I had our daughter two weeks ago. My partner had been prepping to nurse for three months. She went on the pill, took Donperidone (sp), and drowned herself in wild yam, blessed thistle, and what have you. She pumped 9X a day for two months, but the milk just never came in, so she stopped trying shortly after the baby was born. It was way too big a hassle trying to take care of the two of us plus pumping so often.

I had a breast reduction ten years ago so I assumed I'd have nothing, but I now have a little - like 8-10 oz a day. So we're supplimenting and soon I'll stop.

One thing - our lactation consultant insisted that I not nurse the baby, that it would "hurt partner's feelings" while she continued to try to get her milk to come in. By the time partner stopped trying, the baby had gotten used to the bottle and now she won't nurse on the breast. So I have to pump. It's ridiculous. Overall we've had a great experience but I would say this was a big "trust yourself, not the expert" moment for us both.

[aimhart]

i was fascinated by this when my wife was pregnant with our daughter. i did pump and take blessed thistle/fenugreek, but couldn't commit to it enough to induce milk. it is an amazing thing to do, but i believe that for most it requires a lot of pumping and sometimes medication. that said, like other's who've posted, i comfort nursed our daughter for her first 4 months (it's true - the babies know the difference and will demonstrate preference for what they want, whether it's food or soothing). i also used a lact-aid nursing supplementer to feed her with my wife's expressed milk. great for late-night feedings to give my wife one cycle off.