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Are Strollers Ever OK w/ AP Philosophy? - Page 3

post #41 of 119
Almost like bfing in public, wearing your baby (especially a newborn) is still so rare. Some people give you the taboo look. But then that may be a NYC thing. I hardly see moms wearing their babies around me. When I do (granted, he's a big boy), women look at me like I'm a freak. Oh well.

I do use my stroller sparingly. Now that ds is a toddler, I'd much rather give him the exercise of walking to the corner deli. And if he's tired on the way back, I'd hold him. The setback is that my huge grocery bag (because it's a huge fabric contraption) is awfully ugly. Then again, I don't care what others think.

I just get annoyed when women try to tell me what I "should do." Things like, "oh, save your back and put him in a stroller" or "he's gonna have a hard time separating from you if you carry him so much" and blah blah blah.

I do use a stroller. I do love it. But like everyone else has pointed out, it's about balance and baby's preference. My ds likes it. My dd didn't. With my dd, we didn't even own a stroller (except for a freebie from ToysRUs). We had to buy one for ds.

Wish all moms are AP moms sometimes.
post #42 of 119
I use strollers and I am most certainly AP! I used them when DS was little because I didn't have a sling and I'd lay him down when he fell asleep if we were out and about. For a long time, I only used them when we went to the mall or a museum, mainly because I could pile all my stuff on the stroller instead of hauling it around. When DS hit about 18 months, he decided he didn't like the Mei Tai anymore. He would push against me and wiggle and fuss when I put him in it. I think he prefers the stroller because he can look around better, plus when he gets tired I can lay him back and he can nap.
post #43 of 119
I haven't read all posts, so I may be repeating someone's response:

According to my understanding, AP is about following your instincts and responding to baby's needs. Not being knit-picky & getting all riled up about specific details.

I did see a pp's remark that "AP is not about following a list." I couldn't agree MORE!
post #44 of 119
The ergo carrier is a great way to carry my heavy baby and have my hands free. I felt guilty when ever i put my baby in a stroller. But now that she is crawling and over 20 lbs, sometimes she needs to go in the stoller because she is so wiggly and know what, she enjoys it. I just try to not have her in in too long (20 min). take play breaks etc.
post #45 of 119
Sure, I use a jogging stroller when I go roller blading. DS2 LOVES it. It's not like I can wear him and blade
post #46 of 119
Yup, stroller here too. I happen to prefer wearing babes when they're little (and not quite as heavy, lol). But DS loves his umbrella stroller for walks these days - he gets very excited when I ask him if he wants to take a stroller walk! I think it's more of a novelty for them if used judiciously, and thus more fun!

I still prefer to wear DS in the pouch when we go places that are crowded - I feel more secure having him close to me and up on my level, and he seems to as well. I have nightmares about someone not paying attention and crashing into him in that little umbrella stroller, they're so hard to see sometimes in crowds.

So I absolutely believe strollers are "AP"!
post #47 of 119
I've just started using our stroller - DS is just over 7 months. Honestly, he's getting too heavy to carry him AND a diaper bag on long walks. And he seems to enjoy it for short times. He'll hang out in the stroller for 20-30 minutes, then we play, then he'll switch to the ergo. Rinse and repeat, lol.

The weird thing is it took about 2 weeks to get over my guilt of "I should be wearing him" --- but he seems to be ok in there.
post #48 of 119
Bahahaha...anyone who says strollers are not AP did not meet my baby. I had 3 slings before she was even born. She hated EVERY sling, every hold, ANYTHING that confined her to mama's side, aside from my arms. The stroller, however..oh man. Loved it! We have a Jeep Wranger stroller, with the little steering wheel toy in the front that she positively adored. She could stroll for hours and be absolutely content. I felt awful for so long about her hating the sling, thinking I wasn't living up to my AP ideals, until I realized that it's not about supposed AP nomenclature, it's about doing what works best for you and your kids. Forcing the sling on her would have been very UN-AP, to me. Once she turned 1, she started enjoying it more, and I used it more.
post #49 of 119
without a stroller I'd be stuck at home. I have more non-walking kids than I can carry at once! So, I always wear one kiddo, but unless I have an adult helping me or a shopping cart where I'm going, the stroller is a true necessity.

In fact, I just got a new one today, and I am so excited about our greater freedom, because it's lighter and faster to use!

"I did see a pp's remark that "AP is not about following a list." I couldn't agree MORE!"
hear, hear!
post #50 of 119
It is definitely true that you have to work a lot harder to have conversations with child & interact when they are in a stroller. But I sing to my son a lot in the stroller on long walks (we have a song that we only sing on the way to his school) and I also go out of my way to show him things and stop to talk to him while he's in there.

But it is easy for both parties to get sort of lost in their own worlds unless you make an effort to not to that.

As far as criticism of mamas who walk strollers together and talk to each other instead of the kids--bear in mind that that walk might be the only break those mamas are getting all day, and that interaction with other grownups is really important for many mothers in order to be good mamas. I don't think that is a problem.

In my babysitting co-op I used to walk two kids in the double stroller and put one on my back in the backpack, and walk the dog, all at the same time! (I think I was trying to be the most macho mama on the block...) Then two of the 3 kids would fall asleep. Very entertaining trying to get all of us back into the house.
post #51 of 119
Quote:
Originally Posted by fuller2 View Post
It is definitely true that you have to work a lot harder to have conversations with child & interact when they are in a stroller. But I sing to my son a lot in the stroller on long walks (we have a song that we only sing on the way to his school) and I also go out of my way to show him things and stop to talk to him while he's in there.

But it is easy for both parties to get sort of lost in their own worlds unless you make an effort to not to that.

As far as criticism of mamas who walk strollers together and talk to each other instead of the kids--bear in mind that that walk might be the only break those mamas are getting all day, and that interaction with other grownups is really important for many mothers in order to be good mamas. I don't think that is a problem.

In my babysitting co-op I used to walk two kids in the double stroller and put one on my back in the backpack, and walk the dog, all at the same time! (I think I was trying to be the most macho mama on the block...) Then two of the 3 kids would fall asleep. Very entertaining trying to get all of us back into the house.

Also, I find when I say go shopping wiht another mom, while we are yakking, our kids are interacting with each other too.

And believe me, if mine needs my attention, she'll let me know! I didn't know about baby wearing at all when she was little, but I like to hold babies, so I did that as much as I could. I almost always used a stroller for shopping. I was often seen holding baby, pushing the stroller, and trying to get my shopping done! I got a mei tai at 19 months, and I so wish I had it from birth on.

Now, she has to be contained somehow whenever we are out. The stroller is a must for going for walks, usually a shopping cart for shopping, stroller at the mall. She hates both (loves the stroller for walk outside though) but no choice. It's not safe for her to run off.

Then again, I'm not sp. (cause I couldn't nurse more than a few days, and couldn't co-sleep cause I have a pilowtop mattress.)
post #52 of 119
We got the stroller, bucket seat combo before ds and it is the first thing that I will change with the next one. I will get the convertiable, no bucket. I would always put him in the sling out of the car, the bucket never came out until we switched it out. I never used the stroller except to take him on walks around the neighborhood when it was to hot to sling him. I don't think they are anti AP, bucket seats, yeah. But strollers... that is preference. Don't beat yourself up because you have a condition that is out of control.. We all do the best WE can.
post #53 of 119
Quote:
As far as criticism of mamas who walk strollers together and talk to each other instead of the kids--bear in mind that that walk might be the only break those mamas are getting all day, and that interaction with other grownups is really important for many mothers in order to be good mamas. I don't think that is a problem.
They're not walking. I could understand if they were walking. They're standing or sitting in the park while the older kids (who have been in daycare all day) are playing. I agree that interaction with other adults is super important. It really is just a cultural thing though. Babies really ARE supposed to be in theiir stroller, not held, according to the thinking here. You will spoil the baby if you hold her all the time.
post #54 of 119
Stroller user here too.
post #55 of 119
Everyone has said it so well! I always sling the infants. My kids are close in age. I can't sling a newborn and a 2 year old! I have a double stroller. One side is for the toddler and one is for the diaper bag! I almost never use them anymore though. Ds2 is 3.5 and Dd2 is 21mo. She still likes to be worn and Ds2 can walk now..... I never used it when I had one - what a hassle! The toddler liked being in the stroller, and there was never coercion or force. We have lots of fun when we go out!
post #56 of 119
i carry my DD most of the time b/c she is intelligent and interactive and i want to take every opportunity to show her the world and explain things to her. yes, she's getting heavy (10 mo.) but on the other hand, my arms are getting stronger, too! i carried her all day at the zoo, carry her while shopping, etc.
we do have a stroller, which i sometimes use for our 45 minute walks with 11 yo golden retriever-- it takes that long for dog to get around the block!
post #57 of 119
Well I guess I would think that by a strict definition, strollers are not AP - in the sense of promoting attachment. Strollers are not a tool to promote attachment- in the sense that there is no body contact, lower than eye-level etc. And as used by some folks, they can encourage "detachment" (how often have you seen the younger sibling strapped into a stroller to watch from a distance at the playground?)

That said, are they an okay part of an AP lifestyle? - well obviously yes (especially if you have a child like mine who wants DOWN out of the sling and wants to look around!).

That's just kind of how I look at it...

hth
peace
robyn
post #58 of 119
We use the stroller more for carrying the diaper bag and our coats or purchases while out and about than to hold the baby. But we've used it as a place for her to sleep when we were at friend's and family's houses over the holidays, in the pramette feature ours has, when she was about 3 months old.

DH was just saying how we'll probably use the stroller more when the weather gets warmer, and I asked why wouldn't we just keep slinging her? He had no idea why we wouldn't, it just seemed to him like that's what he saw - moms or couples pushing baby in a stroller.
post #59 of 119
I probably would have gone nuts or ruined my back without the stroller. When dd was really little, I had one of those carseat/stroller contraptions with the huge basket, which I loved because it was a mile walk to school and I used to put her in the carseat so she was facing me, and carry her diapers and my school books in the basket. I used it for grocery shopping as well, and when I got a ton of stuff I used to fill the stroller and basket, and then carry dd home in the sling. And when she got older we spent a TON of time out with my friends in the summer by the lake etc, and the stroller was great for her to nap in, especially since it's impossible to participate in a game of hacky sack with a sleeping toddler in a sling That being said, I always had the sling in the basket of the stroller, and had no problem pushing the stroller and having dd in the sling if that's what she wanted.

When we found out we were expecting #2, my first thought was to get another one of those carseat/stroller combos, which I did, and I am sooo looking forward to using it. I think I actually enjoy the large basket for carrying stuff more than anything..and the cup holders!
post #60 of 119
Quote:
Originally Posted by RoundAbout View Post

My pet peeve is actually seeing older kids in strollers. I hate seeing an older kid who can clearly walk being confined to a stroller and pushed around everywhere instead of out exploring his environment.
Do you have an older child?
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