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Mamas W/ Toddlers & A Newborn - Page 6

post #101 of 116
Quote:
Originally Posted by carolyn1976 View Post
It's great to read this thread-DS will be 22 months when #2 is born in August.
Carolyn, I could have written your whole post. My DS will also be 22 mos when #2 arrives, and I am also wondering how best to prepare.
post #102 of 116
I'm glad I found this thread!!!

I'm in the same boat-a 29 month old and a 5 month old. It was really hard in the beginning, but we've definitely found a groove and are working on keeping things going as smoothly as possible.

I haven't read all of the posts in detail, but I'm wondering if there are any other mamas who have toddlers that can't express their anger verbally and resort to biting/hitting/pushing etc. We're dealing with that now and it sucks, big time. Dd does not often direct her anger towards the baby, thank goodness, so I bear the brunt of her rages. But for the love of Pete, I can't take too many more bite marks on my arms. It looks like someone beats me on a regular basis.

I'm so glad that the baby is easygoing and very content. If she were high needs I don't know what I would do.

One suggestion for any moms that might need a break--do you have someone that can come in and help? Give you an hour for a shower/nap? As hard as it is for me to let someone else take care of my girls, I find that a little time away gives me perspective and I come back to them in a better mood and ready to face the challenges that await.

Hang in there, everyone!
post #103 of 116
Thread Starter 
Hi all!

Welcome new mamas!

real quick bump to keep this going!

Things have been busy/wild here~
Dd who just turned 2 last week (had a fab. party for her, BTW Well DD stuck a raisin in DS's mouth! I FREAKED-!! I was right next to both of them when it happened, THANKFULLY I was able to get it out before he choked, OMG!!!!! He just opened his mouth thinking it was a boob I'm sure.....I've been trying my best to watch DD like a hawk esp. when she has food! :
We also did a 10 hour road trip with them, it actually went well!

More later! Hope everyone is well!
post #104 of 116
So, what do we do? DS1 is 27 mo and is very good with DS2. With DH and me he is rude (has starting hitting and spitting out of frustration when he doesn't want to do what we ask), ignores us (and I only really care when it come sto safety things like running the other way on the street towards an intersection), and in general is fragile (he melts completely with no notice). DH is definitely losing his patience and he was raised in a stricter household so on some level he wants more obedience even though he believes in GD. I'm frustrated too and don't want the majority of my interactions with ds1 to be negative, but when it comes to safety I don't see how to change that.
post #105 of 116
reillys_mom, I have found that dd1 does better on the days that I make time to spend time with her. It can be really hard but I have started a few routines that work for us.

1. After we eat lunch and before nap we play whatever she wants for at least 15 minutes. Yes, I'm usually holding/nursing dd2 but I am giving dd1 most of my attention.

2. We have a scheduled reading time 3 times a week. We sit down and read books for 15-30 minutes. Again, I'm usually holding dd2 but still snuggling dd1 while we read.

3. I try to get out of the house with dd2 a few times each month, so that dd1 and dh can have uninterupted time together.

I obviously play and read with her other times but these are scheduled times that she gets with me.

We're doing well. I will write more later dd1 is calling.
post #106 of 116
Thread Starter 
~Quick bump!

How is everyone?
post #107 of 116
Thread Starter 
: where are you all!
post #108 of 116
Just now joining in. DS turned two yesterday, DD is 5 months. It's going really well now...the first three months were worse than living in an apocalypse.
post #109 of 116
How do you deal with the toddler taking babies soother from her? I have tried explaining that she needs it to sleep just like he does but that doesn't work. This is my biggest problem right now. Otherwise things are going pretty good. Busy but good
post #110 of 116
dont forget the updated thread!!

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=665552
post #111 of 116
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by CAUCmama View Post
Just now joining in. DS turned two yesterday, DD is 5 months. It's going really well now...the first three months were worse than living in an apocalypse.
~I can TOTALLY RELATE TO THAT! I'm not even out of the 1st three months yet
post #112 of 116
Thread Starter 
Hi All~

Welcome new mamas!

Life has been so insanely busy! Some days I feel like WOW! I got so much done and this is easy, other days I'm lucky to anything but change diapers and feel like I can't get anything done :

No advice on how to keep the wild toddlers at bay while the babe are sleeping, because that's where my biggest challenge is right now.....Dd thinks it's so fun to scream or try to jump on DS while he tries to sleep.....I'm soooo frustrated!: : : : :

ADVICE PLEASE~
post #113 of 116
I hate to admit it, but when activities and a new toy, or a snack won't work...sometimes I bring in Elmo to help me out. =)
post #114 of 116
Quote:
Originally Posted by Avena View Post
Hi All~

Welcome new mamas!

Life has been so insanely busy! Some days I feel like WOW! I got so much done and this is easy, other days I'm lucky to anything but change diapers and feel like I can't get anything done :

No advice on how to keep the wild toddlers at bay while the babe are sleeping, because that's where my biggest challenge is right now.....Dd thinks it's so fun to scream or try to jump on DS while he tries to sleep.....I'm soooo frustrated!: : : : :

ADVICE PLEASE~
I could've written this exact post, somedays I feel like superwoman and on top of the world and others I am on the verge of tears while walking down the aisle of the supermarket saying to myself "this shouldn't be so hard!"

And my 2 1/2 year old has taken to hitting or poking my 2 month old whenever my back is turned or I am trying to eat or get household stuff done. It infuriates me and last night I had to take a time out away from him after he hit the baby in the head with her toy on purpose during dinner forcing me to forgo eating ONCE AGAIN so I could comfort her.

I wish I had some helpful advice...anyone???
post #115 of 116
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by mom2mimi View Post
I could've written this exact post, somedays I feel like superwoman and on top of the world and others I am on the verge of tears while walking down the aisle of the supermarket saying to myself "this shouldn't be so hard!"

And my 2 1/2 year old has taken to hitting or poking my 2 month old whenever my back is turned or I am trying to eat or get household stuff done. It infuriates me and last night I had to take a time out away from him after he hit the baby in the head with her toy on purpose during dinner forcing me to forgo eating ONCE AGAIN so I could comfort her.

I wish I had some helpful advice...anyone???
WOW! I just had to deal w/DD hurting DS today for the 1st time! I'm so happy you posted! Not happy that either of our babes are getting the brunt of a toddler! I was so upset that DD actually went over to DS, sitting so peaceful in the moses basket and smiling at DD while she poked him right in the eye! Poor DS cried and he never does! I made a nice soothing herbal eye compress and had a chat with DD~ I'm not sure what else to do ~ I give DD so much attention and x-tra love.... so I'm not sure why she is acting out like this! : : : : I guess i've gotta watch her every move now???
post #116 of 116
I have never gotten really mad at my toddler before (or even mad) but the other day I did. Baby was in a swing while I changed my milk-stained shirt that I'd been wearing for 48 hours (we HAD to go out) and toddler would not stop pushing (really hard) the swing. I was scared for the baby's safety.

Well, that was my wake-up call. I do not want to start that path (getting mad) because my toddler was simply being a 2 yo. Getting mad is stupid and ineffective anyway.

My game plan has become to (1) plan ahead as much as possible, esp. when I know I have to go out the next day and (2) prepare for some crying (toddler and/or baby) at moments when safety is #1 BUT make safety #1 at all costs-- without getting mad. For example, my babe would have woken up had I moved her out of the swing (and cried) while I changed my shirt, but that's way better than me getting mad at my toddler.

I am 100% focusing on how I act instead of how my toddler acts. She just gets to act her age (and so do I!).

Oh yeah, and I know it's controversial, but the backpack harness has saved us all (inc. my toddler) from a LOT of frustration when going out.
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