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LoA March 11-17 - Page 12

post #221 of 787
Quote:
Originally Posted by dharmama View Post
Speaking of books....I wanted to share the most BEAUTIFUL book I came across recently. It is called The Secret of Saying THanks by Douglas Wood.

It's a children's picture book that beautifully summarizes LoA!!

Kids need me....
Thank you for the recommendation of the book! I'll see if one of my local libraries carry it. I'd love to read what it has to say.
post #222 of 787
Quote:
Originally Posted by ShannonCC View Post
Penny, I might have missed this but does your son have any special needs? Or any food issues that you know of? First thing in the morning being out of control and shaking a fist in his mother's face just sounds like something's wrong to me. Food from the day before, blood sugar issues, something. Not that it's a choice your son is making to threaten you but something's that affecting him and he's out of control. My daughter can't control her behavior when she eats soy and anger is part of that. Not saying soy is your son's problem but just giving that as an example.
I was going to suggest the same thing. Apples (and some other things we haven't specifically identified) send my boy into a rage. For a lot of kids, corn syrup does it.

catgirl~ Our boys sound soooo much alike, that sometimes I think you're writing my story. (I'm not kidding!) We don't homeschool, though I have it in the back of my mind all the time because of all his issues at school.
post #223 of 787
Quote:
Originally Posted by Annikate View Post
And . . .
another post.

Why oh why can't I find a web design program that will let me put a Paypal button on my site?

I found a good hosting co. w/their own design interface and I really like it. It's straightforward, easy to use and the support is good. BUT . . . it won't let me put html code in myself and they can't do it for me . . . .SO no paypal donation button for me.

BTW, I thought about buying FrontPage or Dreamweaver but I don't want to shell out another few hundred bucks since this software is free yk?

Do you think people will go to paypal on their own if I just give the email addy?

I know it's soooo much easier to just click a button.

Coming out of lurkdom to help:

Terri, I downloaded Mozilla's Nvu over the weekend and it is a super-easy WYSIWYG editor, FREE, and comes with a FTP tool. It works easily with my host (onmis). I found a great tutorial, but I bet you know how to do it all already. You can toggle to view the HTML.

((I don't have much to show for it yet, since I've had no time, but the site is up and it's at www.bamboovillage.org. I got my etsy shop up too, though I'm having a hard time getting good photos of the etched glass pieces... there are only 2 things in there are a result. That one's at http://bamboovillagepress.etsy.com))
post #224 of 787
Amris
I just went to your blog and I think it's lovely how you have it set up, offering individual prayers, thoughts, etc. And laminating them, etc. It's awesome!
post #225 of 787
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amris View Post
Sweety, I am probably going to be flamed for this, but this is my suggestion. I have had this work to good effect for me, though it's probably not AP.

When the child becomes violent, I take him into his room, and pull the door shut behind myself, leaving him there. I hold the door closed, and I simply repeat, "I love you, and when you're done venting your anger and are ready to reason together with me, I will let you come out. I cannot, however, and will not allow you to attempt to injure me. Such behavior is not appropriate." Then I begin again, "I love you, and when you're done..."

(snip)
No flaming here, because I've had to do it. However, while it may work with younger kids, the older they get, the stronger they get. Don't underestimate the power/strength/stamina of an enraged 7-year-old boy (and I don't think I've done it since he's been 7). Seriously, I can barely keep it held shut, and he can definitely outlast me.
post #226 of 787
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amris View Post
And that's it. I am not reading 'everything I can find' and continuing to search. I have chosen now to "knuckle down" and do the work. No more searching, no more seeking.

Now is for the doing.
I totally know what you mean! I do love to study and there are more teachers who's works I would like to eventually explore, BUT the main focus for me is doing the work. Writing in my journal. Doing my yoga. Practicing meditation. Visualizing. Hicks and Hay are the teachers who speak to me the most clearly right now, and they work well together, so that is where I am.

Quote:
Originally Posted by WuWei View Post
I particularly dislike that article by Liedloff. :


on my, I'm crushed! This is so much worse coming from you than from any body else! I thought we would always agree on everything! :

I only skimmed the article you linked because this isn't my big issue right now. . It seemed like a nice article and I didn't see anything that I disagreed with. I never got the feeling from the Liedloff article that she meant to ignore a child, just not to try to elicit a preference where none exist, which is something I used to do when my kids were toddlers and it only made them unhappy.

It seems to me that what we can learn from studying a more intuned culture must be tempered with an understanding of our own situation, which is what your link seemed to be saying.

Quote:
I totally agree that releasing resistance with our children leads to much happiness all around! Finding ways to embrace their passions, interests, and strong minded intentions ("opposition" in non-LoA, competitive terms), works *with* them. Send energy toward *what we do want*, rather than creating conflict about *what we don't want*! It is a very empowered place to be, when our energy is not working against the free will of another person. There is no competition for whose intentions will manifest when we use our energy together to create agreements that satisfy each's needs.
Oh yes, we agree! I think that our society is sooooo out of wack that it is hard to even explain to another parent who is open to the idea what it looks like when neither the parent or the child is *controling* but rather living together in joy.

I think this totally relates to LOA and the law of allowing.

later
post #227 of 787
Thread Starter 
catgirl...

Sending peaceful and loving vibes to you and your family. You and your family are finding a way to balance of all this and meet everyone's needs and wants appropriately. Much love.
post #228 of 787
Kate, I'm taking the liberty of pasting your pm to me here because I wanted to get others' reactions to my reply (since it's pretty much what you'd said on the thread anyway I hope that's OK).

Quote:
Penny, I had to pm you because every fiber of my being is telling me your ds IS your brother. I hope you don't think I'm nuts, especially if you don't believe in this -- but everything you describe is right in line with this phenomena-- similar interests and characteristics.

The changes in him from the happy baby he was. Do you remember how old your brother was when he started having trouble? Perhaps the same age as your son is now?

If you find this to be true, it can actually be a RELIEF to you because you'll know his feelings don't stem from anything you did but from his feelings in his previous life. Resolving these can be only thing he needs. Read those books I recommended and you can even try hypnosis -- that can be very effective.
Kate, I didn't reply right away because I wasn't sure hwat I felt about it. As I said, I'm not entirely on board with the whole past lives thing, although I don't rule it out.

But right now, the idea that he's my brother is just too darn scary. It's like history repeating itself. It seems like with the best of intentions, something's gone wrong, and he refuses help. Yes, of course that's like my brother. So what else is going to be like my brother? Remember, this was the guy who committed suicide. (Which, by the way, had a ghastly effect on my life and led to all kinds of painful choices, including getting married so late that I only have one child. This one, whom I love more than my life. I feel terrible admitting this, but one reason I was desperated for another child was becasue I wanted a "spare" in case anything happened to this one.) I just started to be able to feel safe again (for the first time since I was 9 years old), and I've let go a bit, and things seem to be spinning out of control, and now ds is telling me he feels bad (and he's certainly acting like he feels bad) and people are saying maybe he's my brother. Maybe he is, I don't know, but you can undersatnd why I would find that hard to handle.
post #229 of 787
Quote:
Originally Posted by celesterra View Post
I'm having a hard time getting good photos of the etched glass pieces... there are only 2 things in there are a result. That one's at http://bamboovillagepress.etsy.com))

Wow! Those are beautiful! Maybe after I declutter...

May I make a suggestion (even though you didn't ask : )? Maybe consider adding the "I have etched the word... All of my etched pieces are done free-hand and without the use of stencils" to all the pieces, if possible. I was confused about the decanter when I first saw it. Not being very familiar with etsy, I didn't know if that was something you did personally, or if it was just something you're trying to sell. When I read about the lantern, I did a "WOW - she did that!" and it made me want to own it more.
post #230 of 787
Thread Starter 
Penny,
Would he be open to doing some healing energy work? My sons aren't so crazy about talking their way through things, but they are sometimes open to doing energy work (BodyTalk, Cranio-sacral, etc) If this is past life related, those things will help. If it's this life related, those therapies will help. All he has to do is rest on a table while someone helps move energy in his body.

It might be worth asking him. You might get a whole lot of insight into him and his behavior as a result.
post #231 of 787
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amris View Post
I would like to hope that, as I study the path I have chosen, I will continue to learn and grow.

Some are able to weed out and do "take what you want, and leave the rest" very well. Some of us are not. I am of the "not so much" catagory. I have to stop seeking all over the place, or I will just continue to confuse myself.

I tend to quit doing one while I'm searching the next. I quit doing EFT when I found the Sedona Method, for example. Then I read about the Attractor Factor, and I started focusing entirely on that for a while. Then I moved on to...

And on the story goes.

I need to knuckle down, and apply something on a long-term, consistent basis. I don't do that when I am "searching" different methods. When I learn of a method, I am of the type that, I have to try it. Then I have to try the next one. And the next one.

So, now I intend to stick with the tools I have selected. If I cease learning simply because I choose to stick with those, then I think I have a big problem.
Why does this sound so familiar?? The story of my life... Occasionally, I "make the decision" to focus on one or two (or three : ) things, but so far I haven't figured out what I want to focus on. It's all so exciting and interesting to me. I want to know it ALL! But I think it's time for me to narrow it down, too.
post #232 of 787
Quote:
Originally Posted by catgirl View Post
right now, the idea that he's my brother is just too darn scary. It's like history repeating itself. It seems like with the best of intentions, something's gone wrong, and he refuses help. Yes, of course that's like my brother. So what else is going to be like my brother? Remember, this was the guy who committed suicide. (Which, by the way, had a ghastly effect on my life and led to all kinds of painful choices, including getting married so late that I only have one child. This one, whom I love more than my life. I feel terrible admitting this, but one reason I was desperated for another child was becasue I wanted a "spare" in case anything happened to this one.) I just started to be able to feel safe again (for the first time since I was 9 years old), and I've let go a bit, and things seem to be spinning out of control, and now ds is telling me he feels bad (and he's certainly acting like he feels bad) and people are saying maybe he's my brother. Maybe he is, I don't know, but you can undersatnd why I would find that hard to handle.
Penny, sorry I haven't responded to the discussion about your son earlier. I've been reading along, though.

I'm in the same boat about not really knowing where I fall on the past lives thing. I tend to not believe that - I just don't believe in reincarnation.

That said, this discussion has been very tender and very stirring. I bolded the section of your post that spoke to me that perhaps it's not that he IS your brother, but perhaps he is filling that role symbolically for you. Remember how I said that I discovered that symbolically my sister could be my baby? Maybe it's like that - especially since you're finding resonance with the idea of your son being linked to your brother.

And this fits in with LOA, too. If you delayed having a baby because of the trauma around your brother and the residual fear, and you have been vibrating a certain way around young boys, especially that close and tender relationship of a young brother/ young son, maybe it's more to the point that you've been vibrating in a way that is pulling your son in a particular direction? I'm not saying this as blame at all, so I hope you don't take it that way - I'm finding it hard to express this...

Well, I also know that sometimes it's hard for me to express the fullness of a situation by posting. Maybe you could find some people to process this with that you trust, who you can actually speak to? I know you're hurting about this situation... You have my contact info and can call me any time if you need a listening ear.

I kind of went around in circles on this (this is why I haven't been posting...) but anyway I'm reading and sending my love.
post #233 of 787
catgirl I'm so sorry. s
post #234 of 787
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amris View Post
The following is "not exactly" a Message. It's more like a, "go talk about this" kind of Message, instead of a "say this, and say this, and this" kind of Message. Okay, given that that is now as clear as mud...

I had a bad habit. I would read a Teacher's book or visit their seminar, or whatnot. Then, I would read another Teacher's book. Sometimes, the second book would be different from the first book.

Now that I was confused, i'd read a third book in order to sort out the differences of the first and second book. In the third book, I would find something that didn't agree with the first and second book. So I'd buy a fourth book, in order to see if I could resolve the conflicts of the first three...

So, this time around, I have gotten James' Ray's The Science of Success, and I am sticking with that. I am also using Holosynch, and the Sedona Method. I also continue to listen to and use my tapes from innertalk.com, and I clear myself using EFT.

And that's it. I am not reading 'everything I can find' and continuing to search. I have chosen now to "knuckle down" and do the work. No more searching, no more seeking.

Now is for the doing.

For me personally, the time of becoming educated is passed, and the time of putting the education to work and knuckling down and DOING is at hand.

I choose to no longer confuse myself with the advice of various Teachers. It is time for me to choose ONE, and follow that ONE.

I have chosen a limited number of tools. And I use those tools, and follow the teachings of "the ONE" that I have selected. I haven't chosen in ignorance. I studied and searched.

But at some point, the searching must end, and the growing must begin.
I completely understand. I was making myself crazy trying to soak up everything out there to make sure I had it "right". But just last night I laid it down and asked God to specifically show me if there was anything I needed to look into. Until He does, I won't. I just don't have the time to spend 8 hours a day researching. (although I kinda wish I did....)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Annikate View Post
And . . .
another post.

Why oh why can't I find a web design program that will let me put a Paypal button on my site?

I found a good hosting co. w/their own design interface and I really like it. It's straightforward, easy to use and the support is good. BUT . . . it won't let me put html code in myself and they can't do it for me . . . .SO no paypal donation button for me.

BTW, I thought about buying FrontPage or Dreamweaver but I don't want to shell out another few hundred bucks since this software is free yk?

Do you think people will go to paypal on their own if I just give the email addy?

I know it's soooo much easier to just click a button.

Well guess what. I have Frontpage and I don't like it. It's sitting on my shelf. You want it? You can have it. If you love it and can build pages faster than the speed of light, you can make some for me OK?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Amris View Post
Sweety, I am probably going to be flamed for this, but this is my suggestion. I have had this work to good effect for me, though it's probably not AP.

When the child becomes violent, I take him into his room, and pull the door shut behind myself, leaving him there. I hold the door closed, and I simply repeat, "I love you, and when you're done venting your anger and are ready to reason together with me, I will let you come out. I cannot, however, and will not allow you to attempt to injure me. Such behavior is not appropriate." Then I begin again, "I love you, and when you're done..."

I know it's not CL or AP, but at the same time, sometimes you need a transition into those things, IMO.

I realize that it's more popular on these boards to be perfectly AP, but we're not all able to do that, all the time. When you have times like this, I think it's better to shut him in his room so that neither one of you gets hurt, than to end up snarling at him, or having to physically restrain him in that manner.

This is just my opinion, you know? Maybe someone else will have better advice for you.

The thing to remember, though, is to not LOCK HIM IN. You should be there, holding the handle of the door. This should be done only so long as you are able to be present and speaking to him lovingly through the door.

It is NOT acceptable, and I am NOT advocating, locking a child into a closet, or even into their room. Holding the door past the moments when they are attempting to be a physical danger to you is NOT acceptable. (This is my disclaimer before everyone says, "OMG, you said to lock the baby in his bedroom!)
No flaming from me sister. I've had to do that. The important thing to to make sure they know you are right there and you will help them if they need it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by catgirl View Post
Kate, I'm taking the liberty of pasting your pm to me here because I wanted to get others' reactions to my reply (since it's pretty much what you'd said on the thread anyway I hope that's OK).



Kate, I didn't reply right away because I wasn't sure hwat I felt about it. As I said, I'm not entirely on board with the whole past lives thing, although I don't rule it out.

But right now, the idea that he's my brother is just too darn scary. It's like history repeating itself. It seems like with the best of intentions, something's gone wrong, and he refuses help. Yes, of course that's like my brother. So what else is going to be like my brother? Remember, this was the guy who committed suicide. (Which, by the way, had a ghastly effect on my life and led to all kinds of painful choices, including getting married so late that I only have one child. This one, whom I love more than my life. I feel terrible admitting this, but one reason I was desperated for another child was becasue I wanted a "spare" in case anything happened to this one.) I just started to be able to feel safe again (for the first time since I was 9 years old), and I've let go a bit, and things seem to be spinning out of control, and now ds is telling me he feels bad (and he's certainly acting like he feels bad) and people are saying maybe he's my brother. Maybe he is, I don't know, but you can undersatnd why I would find that hard to handle.
I can't help but think there is a connection. I don't know anything about past lives, but could there be something more than coincidence, less than a full blow reincarnation (since that doesn't seem to be settling with you)
post #235 of 787
Quote:
Originally Posted by catgirl View Post
Kate, I didn't reply right away because I wasn't sure hwat I felt about it. As I said, I'm not entirely on board with the whole past lives thing, although I don't rule it out..
Maybe he has the same "issues" as your brother. The women in my family all have similar depression and health issues because of genetics. There's one adopted person in the family who doesn't have these issues (he has his own he inherited from his family of birth). I just mention that because no, it's not always how we're raised. Sometimes it's just plain genetics. Food sensitivities, environmental allergies, depression, lots of things tend to run in biological families.
post #236 of 787
Penny. All other things aside, I would second what Shannon was saying about food issues. Have you looked into the Feingold Program Some children are extremely chemical sensitive - the program eliminates all artificial colors, flavors, preservatives, sweeteners, and also during the first stage, many fruits that are high in salycilates (apples, berries, oranges, grapes, and others). We are seeing huge differences, especially in our 3 year old, and when we "cheat", we can also see how much the program is helping because he will regress.

You might also look into gluten/casein issues ... I've read places where Celiac's (gluten and casein intolerance) can manifest itself in some severe behavior issues with children.

No matter what the cause ... it does not have to be this way. Whatever is causing the behavior and issues for your ds, he does not have to be like this forever ... and from what you are writing, I would highly suspect a food intolerance/chemical intolerance.
post #237 of 787
Quote:
Originally Posted by celesterra View Post
Coming out of lurkdom to help:

Terri, I downloaded Mozilla's Nvu over the weekend and it is a super-easy WYSIWYG editor, FREE, and comes with a FTP tool. It works easily with my host (onmis). I found a great tutorial, but I bet you know how to do it all already. You can toggle to view the HTML.

((I don't have much to show for it yet, since I've had no time, but the site is up and it's at www.bamboovillage.org. I got my etsy shop up too, though I'm having a hard time getting good photos of the etched glass pieces... there are only 2 things in there are a result. That one's at http://bamboovillagepress.etsy.com))
Thank you! I'm still learning all of this and I'm using a WYSISYG editor so I'll probably be able to do it!

I still don't know what FTP is though. . .
post #238 of 787
catgirl
post #239 of 787
Quote:
Originally Posted by Annikate View Post
Thank you! I'm still learning all of this and I'm using a WYSISYG editor so I'll probably be able to do it!

I still don't know what FTP is though. . .
FTP is peer to peer file transfer protocol.

In other words, rather than submitting a website to their website, from where it uploaded to your website...

FTP transfers the files directly to your website's server, no middleman.
post #240 of 787
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amris View Post
FTP is peer to peer file transfer protocol.

In other words, rather than submitting a website to their website, from where it uploaded to your website...

FTP transfers the files directly to your website's server, no middleman.
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