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Why UC? - Page 2

post #21 of 35
My question is not "Why UC?" but "Why do so many women feel that a natural, normal bodily process requires professionals, medical assistance, technology, drugs, etc?" To me, they're the ones who should be explaining
post #22 of 35
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2bluefish
Instead of looking at it as "disliking" having an attendant, try on this thought - "I *like* being alone." They are completely different concepts.
Quote:
Originally Posted by SublimeBirthGirl
My question is not "Why UC?" but "Why do so many women feel that a natural, normal bodily process requires professionals, medical assistance, technology, drugs, etc?"
post #23 of 35
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post #24 of 35
I chose UC because it made sense to me. I am not someone who just knew instinctively that I would birth unassisted. I was not comfortable enough with instinct after being brainwashed into the medicallized birth atmosphere all my life. I did a LOT of research before I had my UC, and everything I came across showed that unless I could find a midwife who would "assist me as needed" as opposed to "birthing my baby", a UC was the only way to go. The more I researched it, the more I felt that I could "midwife myself" if the case arose (i.e. if there was something "off" I could see the signs and make the adjustments necessary..be it unwrapping the cord from the neck, taking something to stop PP bleeding, or knowing when to go to the hospital). I had actually seriously considered studying to become a midwife, but the local climate is horrendous for midwives where I am, and I know I'd get my license taken away in less time than it took to get it for bending the rules~

It is unfortunate that birth has become so medicallized and the spirituality and enjoyment of birth has been stripped away to the extent that it has, be it by fear or by those who have never and will never understand the pureness and beauty of natural childbirth. Unfortunately, that is the way it is, and with every medical "person" brought into your birth, you increase the risk of intervention, and the resulting risks of those interventions.
post #25 of 35
Quote:
Originally Posted by ruhbehka View Post
I just felt like I was SO much outside my own body and mind during labor that I couldn't have easily come back inside to make critical decisions in an emergency. Of course, I've never been in an emergency situation like that, and maybe instinct would totally take over.

What has your experience been like, in labor? Similar or very different?
I had a UC/hospital transfer. I transferred after 19 hrs labor. I had almost 8 hrs excruciating transition/pushing ctx; apparently it was a small lip of cervix that was taking forever to go away.

Anyway, my experience was both just like yours AND the complete opposite.

When I was at home and laboring, I was in complete control. I was working really, really hard, but I was perfectly aware, totally lucid and tuned into the birth, and very conscious and aware of my state and the baby's state. I finally decided to go to the hospital b/c I felt the baby should have been born by then (with the sensations I'd been having for hours) and because I was becoming exhausted and either needed to get some relief or for labor to be over relatively soon. I don't think it in any way suggests UC is unsafe that I realized when I needed to do something different in labor and chose to call my doctor and go to the hospital.

However, once I was at the hospital, I suddenly discovered how suggestible I was. I agreed to anything and everything. I felt like I had no control unless someone gave it to me. I felt (searching my memories here - these were not conscious thoughts) lost, naive, taken care of. I felt very grateful that all these people were here to tell me what to do and to get this over with (because I was soooooo ready to be done). In the end, little was done except external monitors were placed, the doctor pushed the lip of cervix out of the way, and I pushed the baby out in 25 min. While pushing, I was able to do as suggested ("slow down now and push the baby's head out with little pushes"). I was still conscious, but I could not argue or come out of that haze to defend myself against anything. Dh said he tried to disagree with a couple of things that were happening, but I said it was "okay." He actually said that my level of submission was truly frightening to him; that I didn't expect such a transformation and he'd never seen me like that. I don't remember it quite that way, but I believe him.

So yes and no. The UC part of my birth was mine. I was in complete control, conscious, tuned in, and able to make decisions. I didn't physically feel any different when at the hospital, but suddenly deferred to everyone's "suggestions." That bothers me. I think that's one reason why I'm really considering UC again, even though at first I was hesitant. I know that I would have been able to make a smart, educated, thoughtful, and instinctive decision in an emergency at home. I know what I would have done in a cord prolapse or pp hemorrhage situation - dh and I had discussed both of those, and many others, prior to the birth. I wasn't "counting" on him to handle an emergency unless I became unresponsive, but I think that we would have taken remedial action before that happened. I also felt very strongly that we greatly reduced our risk of any complication arising by having a UC and avoiding medical, psychological, and physiological interference with the birth process.

I don't think it's so much that you would have come back to your own body/mind in an emergency, but that you would never have left. Not in the way that you do when attended by a professional.

That's just how I see it from my own experience, and I've heard very similar stories from others who have had both a hospital birth and UC.

Julia
dd 1 year old
post #26 of 35
so how do we sticky this, so we can keep it avaliable to newbies?
post #27 of 35
Julia, my hospital birth and UC were TOTALLY different as far as mentality is concerned. When I look back at both, it's just mindblowing that I was the same person. During my hospital birth, I was looking to others to get me through. Active involvement of my husband, direction from the midwife, etc. I felt lost and helpless. This feeling was one reason I chose to UC-I didn't want to have anyone to look to. I wanted to have only myself to count on. My husband was with me, but we'd talked about this ahead of time.

He had no idea where I was during my labor. I was in the pool, and he was snoozing on the bean bag next to it. He had no idea I was in transition. I felt calm, in control. I was tired and in pain, but not afraid or confused like I was with my hospital baby. My mind was in a totally different place, and it is one reason that I would NEVER go back to a hospital unless I truly had to. I don't like feeling like a victim of my own labor, waiting to be rescued. After Grace was born I felt powerful.
post #28 of 35
I chose UC because I started listening to what my son was telling me. Had I resisted, I would have had an unplanned UC or a tragic outcome. Perhaps that counts as an "instinctual" UC, but it didn't seem that way to me. I felt that I was in communication with my son from early on in the pg. I was just following what he asked of me, regarding how he wanted to be born. If the next baby wants a planned c-section, I'll go with that. For my preference, I couldn't be happier with uc'ing, and will always choose it as my first option. I love the privacy!
post #29 of 35
Bumping
post #30 of 35
I think because SublimeBirthGirl here anyway so many women fear having the same experience as Romana9+2 - endless hours of bone-crunching excrutiating agony.
Birth is protrayed as being something akin to torture.
And the big fear that something will go wrong with them or their baby that they cannot cope with.
post #31 of 35
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kidzaplenty View Post
.

When I have people over, no matter who they are, I feel the need to be "hostess". So I could never relax with a MW or anyone else around. I am also a very private person, a very modest person. And I am not comfortable around other people with minimal (or no) clothing on.
I think this is one of the reasons I am considering UP/UC. (I did have a great mw attended homebirth though)I just feel like if someone is in my home, then I need to be helping them feel comfortable.

The other is financial. I am in a complicated insurance situation that would have me pay out of pocket for a hb (4,100!) if I get pregnant before September. That makes me feel like money is controlling my life and that is something I try and avoid.

I will be hanging around here a little. Dh is great with the homebirth part, but kind of freaked out by uc.
Jen
post #32 of 35
The reasons I am choosing UC keep getting reinforcment.I toured the L&D dept. of the hospital I would have to go to (insurance).The staff there is not experienced with non med, non intervention births unless I have a MW to attend me.In order to be seen by the MW I have to agree to GD test and GBS test.I will also have to allow the doppler and not gain more than 40 lbs along with thew other standard things that get you risked out to the OBs.The appts are no more than 15 minutes long.I went to my first appt last week and when I tried to bring up my fast labors ( 5 hrs,2 hrs, and 50 minutes) she just shrugged it off and said it will probably be different this time.I live farther away from the hospital this time and already am having contractions that get more painful going over potholes.I do not think I would even make it there in time anyway.Why leave my house, its so comfy and noone is going to burst in on me just to check my vitals and then in a half hour the baby's so that neither one of us really get any rest.I can't have a homebirth because I live in military housing and you have to have military ID to get to my house ( I forgot mine the other day and DH had to come and give it to me, they don't take a driver's license).I tend to labor on my own anyway.I close my eyes and hole up in the bathroom.
I want privacy and respect and comfort and to know what has been used to clean the floors and when they actually were last cleaned.I want to fit in the bed not have my legs dangle over the bottom.I know my body better than any outsider other than God.The reasons just go on and on.
post #33 of 35
Maybe it is too simplistic...but, why not UC?

Or...Why hospital/birth center?

For me, this was a natural progression. I now trust my body.
post #34 of 35
post #35 of 35
Quote:
Originally Posted by ruhbehka View Post
I'm sure this question has been asked before... but why do you choose UC?

I was talking with dh about the concept, because he'd never heard of it. He wasn't particularly concerned about safety, as we both understand that it's not that difficult to pinpoint problems in labor. But he basically just wanted to know... why? What makes you choose UC over the other options? How is the experience different from, say, a homebirth with a lay midwife?

So, tell us curious people what makes you opt for UC.
Why not?

I don't do well with people. I don't like to second guess my instincts. I think I would have a hard time inviting someone into what should be an intimate event- kind of like how I'd have a hard time doing anything sexual in front of others, kwim? I don't think I could fully relax and release myself to the forces of nature that cause us to birth.
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