PLEASE HELP! Slow weight gain in third baby

[wildmonkeys]

Hi everyone - I breastfed both of my older children beyond a year and they always cranked on the weight. We had really wonderful nursing relationships despite a bout of thrush and whatnot.

My third son will be a month old on Thursday and we are having such a hard time. First he was in the NICU with fluid in his lungs, then he had an extended and stubborn round of jaundice which had him under the lights and back to the Dr. for blood checks for over two weeks, the Dr. then heard a heart murmur which a cardiologist confirmed, but determined to be benign and said required limited follow-up and throughout all of this we have been struggling with weight gain. He was 8 lbs. 12 at birth - his weight has gone down, then up, then down and is back up a bit yesterday at 25 days to 8 lbs 13....

I just don't know why he is only just reaching his birth weight at a month. I think I am making enough milk, but he had meconium in his diapers until about 10 days? His sleep/eating rountine is strange - a cluster of feedings with no sleep all morning and then I can hardly wake him all afternoon, evening, night to eat. My mother acts like I am starving him by no giving him formula (she was very supportive of my bfing the other boys because they were gaining weight) and my Drs. who are generally VERY pro-bfing are very concerned.

Any suggestions? I am feeling so blue - it has been such a stressful and sad month and I just feel like I am not enjoying him at all because of all of the medical "crisis"

BJ
Barney, Ben & Patrick

[thepeach80]

I bet the sicknes had a lot to do w/ it. My 3rd baby has been having weight problems too, it started w/ fluid in her ears at 2 mos old, 2 rounds of EIs, that made her not want to eat etc. She basically just became satisfied w/ what she got, and never asked for more despite needing more. Do you have a pump? Have you seen a LC or bfing medicine specialist (don't think these are common, but we have one here)? Have they checked suck strength? Is he tongue tied? We are supplementing now and pumping like mad and taking herbs etc and she's gained a # in just over a week! Supplementing helped her realize she was hungry and now her sleep/awake patterns are more normal and she cries to be fed etc. Good luck.

[quirkylayne]

I agree that it may be because of illness. As long as his dipes/development are good I wouldn't worry too much. You can eat things like avocados and nuts to increase your fat intake/make your milk more fatty. Good luck mama. I hope you can get some rest and the help/support you need. Hugs.

[gwynthfair]

My doctor told me that they should gain their birth weight back by 3-4 weeks, so it doesn't seem all that long. I'm sure the illness is a factor.

[blsilva]

I agree with pps. A month is really not that long when you consider everything that he has been through in that short month. A very bf-friendly nurse told me that everything a baby encounters from birth- jaundice especially- burns more calories, as his body is working extra hard to deal with everything.
Try not to worry about it. As long as diapers are full (so he's not dehydrated) and he is growing, however slowly, he is fine.

[wildmonkeys]

Thanks ladies. I really appreciate all the support. I also talked to a LaLeche leader yesterday and she reminded me of some other approaches to get him to eat more. We have another weight check on Monday and I am hoping he is continuing to make steady progress. Will keep your good advice in mind over the course of the next week whenever somebody tells me that "some babies just need formula" : (If anyone who is on here is supplementing, I am not dismissing that some babies might need formula, I am just surprised how quickly everyone want me to throw in the towel, ykwim?)

BJ
Barney, Ben & Patrick

[blsilva]

Originally Posted by wildmonkeys

I am just surprised how quickly everyone want me to throw in the towel, ykwim?)

When my ds was first born, he had jaundice, and we took him in for weight/jaundice checks every day. They told us at day 3 that we should supplement because he was not gaining weight yet- he was not losing anymore, but not gaining. They told us this for the next 4 days, and I kept refusing. Finally, at one week (he had gained 4 oz) they insisted that I start formula because, in spite of the fact that he was gaining, and obviously not dehydrated, he had not gained his birthweight back (at 1 week!! : ), and needed formula. I left the office sobbing and convinced that I was starving my baby to death.
Then I made an appointment with an incredible LC.
I never saw them again.
I did, however, make a point of reading everything about breastfeeding, and made sure that I was knowledgeable enough that no doctor would ever scare me like that again. :
Don't let them scare you. Your baby is fine.

[ruhbehka]

Originally Posted by wildmonkeys

I just don't know why he is only just reaching his birth weight at a month. I think I am making enough milk, but he had meconium in his diapers until about 10 days?

Hmm. That is a bit concerning... Dr. Jack Newman (probably the biggest breastmilk advocate out there) puts a lot of weight on a baby's pooping patterns. He's extremely concerned if a little one is still passing meconium at day five. So day 10, very, very concerning, especially with the jaundice problems.

Originally Posted by wildmonkeys

His sleep/eating rountine is strange - a cluster of feedings with no sleep all morning and then I can hardly wake him all afternoon, evening, night to eat.

I think you may have some milk transfer problems. That is, you are probably making enough milk (or at least were... when you first started nursing him), but he is not drinking it effectively. He's obviously getting a good bit of milk, since he's not overly dehydrated and he's gained some weight. But at day 10, he certainly wasn't getting enough. It's hard to say now.

How's his behavior? Periods of quiet alertness, or still feed-feed-feed-cry-feed-sleep-sleep-sleep? If you're basically only observing three states: feeding, crying, and sleeping, and in addition he's not gaining well, that's indicative of a problem.

First, I'd suggest contacting a good lactation consultant and renting a hospital grade pump. You are going to need to pump to maintain your supply (and build it), while you figure out whether he has learned to nurse.

One possibility is that he initially didn't nurse well, but now he's figured it out and he'll gain quickly from here on out. Hopefully, that's what's going on! Have an LC do a pre and post weight check and get an idea how the milk transfer is doing... is he getting a reasonable amount of milk for the amount of suckling he's doing? That's what you want to know.

If the answer is "no," then you need to start working with her to figure out possible problems. He could have tongue tie, or he could be sucking strangely, etc.

If he's getting enough milk now, then chances are, he had some problems in the beginning but learned to nurse.

If you need to supplement in the meantime, first you should try pumping and seeing if you can supplement with your own milk, using a supplemental nurser at the breast. If you can't pump enough to supplement him as needed, then you might see if there's a breastmilk bank in your area, or talk to a close friend who nurses and see if she can provide some.

In any case, I would be concerned and suggest you see an LC for a checkup, even just to put your own mind at ease.

[prettypixels]

Originally Posted by wildmonkeys

Thanks ladies. I really appreciate all the support. I also talked to a LaLeche leader yesterday and she reminded me of some other approaches to get him to eat more. We have another weight check on Monday and I am hoping he is continuing to make steady progress. Will keep your good advice in mind over the course of the next week whenever somebody tells me that "some babies just need formula" : (If anyone who is on here is supplementing, I am not dismissing that some babies might need formula, I am just surprised how quickly everyone want me to throw in the towel, ykwim?)

BJ
Barney, Ben & Patrick

I don't even understand the statement, "some babies just need formula." Huh? Weird.

Well, anyways... weight gain is the gold standard indicator of milk supply. I waited until we were six weeks out to *really* get aggressive with my milk supply and I wish beyond wishing I'd done something sooner... I think I was a little in denial and lots of people kept telling me not to worry about it. When my baby was six weeks out and still way below birth weight I made the decision to start supplementing her... I will probably never have a full milk supply now.

Here's the thing though... had my milk supply problems been addressed, say, week one? Maybe then it could've been fixed. Of course no one knows. The point of this is... don't WAIT to deal with it if you suspect a supply problem.

Regarding breastfeeding problems, step one is: feed the baby! Step two is fix the problem. Make sure your baby is fed, get pumping, get herbal supplements, whatever battle plan you choose, but don't wait mama, because the longer you wait I believe the harder it is to get back to where you should be.

So sorry about all the problems you guys are having and I wish you the best, and hope that you can totally ignore my advice and your little guy will gain a pound by his next weight check!

[thepeach80]

When you have low milk supply, a child who won't nurse on top of that, and they have allergies so donor milk is not an option, they have to eat something so they need to have formula. There are also children w/ metabolic issues and allergy issues who CANNOT bf, so it's either they need formula or they die. Yes, formula is not ideal, but it's better than letting your child starve. Not that this is relevant right now in this situation it seems, but that's what it means. People do give up too fast though on bfing, I think about it all the time, but can't give up yet.

[wildmonkeys]

Well...we had his weight check today and he gained an entire pound!!! Up to 9 lbs 13 ozs. I did blessed thistle & feengreek all week worked with a lactation consultant to try to take steps to improve his suck while pumping after most times that I fed him (so it would be hindmilk) and gave that to him from a bottle a number of times a day. We did on demand feeding plus I actively roused him to feed a number a times 5-10ish a day to eat.

I do know that lots of people have supply issues, but I just didn't think I did since I didn't the past couple of times I nursed and was even able to donate milk while nursing my second son. The issue was much more his energy level and getting off to a bad start --- I think that having him whisked away in immediately after delivery since he was having trouble breathing set a bad tone and it went downhill from there.

Thanks so much for all the support - it just goes to show that despite lots of nursing experience we were thrown off track pretty easily due to a few health "crisis".

Hugs to you thepeach & prettypixels and others who have had ongoing struggles and are still working so hard - the last couple of weeks have been sooo stressful - I can't imagine how frustrating your experiences have been.

Thanks for sharing and supporting me -

BJ
Barney, Ben & Patrick

[ruhbehka]

Originally Posted by wildmonkeys

Well...we had his weight check today and he gained an entire pound!!!

Yay!!!

[thepeach80]

That's awesome! We're up 1.5# w/ some formula use in the past 2 wks, but I think I'm slowly making more milk...