I'm always so glad when a new thread begins because then there is a small glimmer of hope that I'll be able to keep up with it!
And because I'm too tired right now to multi-quote, I'm just going to give out a big
: to everything that has already been said.
See, all this laughing has me already raising my vibration!
So, I began my constitutional remedy last week ... maybe actually 1 1/2 weeks ago and have begun noticing more and more about me. (Yes, it's ALL about me!
) I'm not sure if it's completely related to the remedy, or the remedy plus the Holosync (try to listen to that every night), or those two plus the acupuncture or ... you get the picture. But, I know I am learning more about me than I think I have ever in my lifetime.
Last night we were at swim relays for high school girls. (Dh's family is an aquatic dynasty out here and my fil runs a two-week relay event; we go every year.) I realized that I get extremely emotional when I'm at events like that (from swim relays where I don't know any of the participants to watching my oldest play pee-wee indoor soccer). I don't though when I'm at a huge sporting event like a professional baseball game or such. And I think it's because the vibration and energy in those events (especially the swim relays - they are in a natatorium so it's extremely loud and pumped in there) that it is overwhelming. As I watch the swimmers, I typically have to bite my lip from crying. But it's not a sad cry, but the kind where you are just so overwhelmed with pride almost. And all I can think of is my reaction to the extremely high energy in there, yk? We only go to the finals, there is really only positive feelings, I've never seen crying from sadness or poor sportmanship or anything else there ... so I'm realizing that I can be very sensitive to extremely high/positive feelings like that. It was kind of a cool realization (though didn't help much in the situation as I didn't want to actually cry on the side of the pool deck, yk?!).
I'm also realizing that I need to learn and accept that it's okay to have a tough day/hour/time. I am focusing basically all my intention on being completely healthy and whole. When I have a day/hour/moment of negativity/anger/frustration/sadness, my first thought is that "it's not working." I'm learning to correct myself though with the realization that we all can have down moments ... the feelings themselves (anger, sadness, etc) aren't "bad" ... but rather present us with a choice of continuing in them or moving past them. Kind of the "let go, let God" type of thing. It actually reminds me of something in Tuesdays with Morrie that never used to make sense to me. He speaks of feeling an emotion and then letting it go ... he feels sadness over his illness, he allows himself to fully feel it, and then he lets it go. He does the same for all emotions/feelings ... and I never really got it when we'd get to that part of the book (I use the book when I teach my college course ... or when I used to teach ... I'm temporarily retired). But it's starting to make sense to me, yk?
Anyways, with that in mind ... my intentions for the week:
- Write in my journal instead of keeping realizations/thoughts/gratitudes in my head.
- Go with the flow of our rhythm rather than try to work against it.
- Extend unconditional love and grace to my dh and children.
- Make a poster-sized rhythm/schedule for our kitchen wall to help keep track of "have-to's" and daily life.
- Spend alone time with dh more frequently.
- Listen to the Holosync cd every night.
- Go for a walk each evening while the sun is still .
I'm going to sit back and allow the Universe to continue to work in and through me ... I'm going to bask in learning more and more about myself. I am going to continue the last of our decluttering, and as I/we do so, I am going to continue to let go of fears and self-limiting beliefs. All is well.