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mamas exploring bisexuality while in relationship(s) - Page 5  

post #81 of 108
3/3/06 at 1:27pm
Yikes ... I actually share a completely different email address with my family for that sort of reason. Why was your sister googling your email address? Still ... crappy situation.

I'm sorry, mama... I hope all is well.
post #82 of 108
3/4/06 at 1:53pm
I use separate e-mails for different things and I NEVER use my real last name for anything online. That way my private life can be kept private, my past can't bite me in the ass and I don't have to worry about my safety in cyber space.
The funny thing is that I do know a couple moms who are a part of this mothering forums community and well they don't know I'm bi (but if they come across this then they do now!). I've been feeling a bit nervous of them finding out this way cuz all they need to do is look at my profile and see all my posts!! But I want my friends to know who I am so I guess it's O.K.(just not the best way to tell your friends your gay!)

I think I'll change my sig. so I nick's for my kids instead of their real names...just to be cautious.(God, I think I'm getting paranoid).
post #83 of 108
3/6/06 at 11:30am
My mom is the "don't ask, don't tell" set of mind. I have never out and out said mom I am bi and polyamorous. But she knows I am "weird."

I am pretty much out.
post #84 of 108
3/6/06 at 3:00pm
Funny, as that's pretty much the way it is with my mom... actually my whole family. I think that they have a pretty good idea, but don't really care to know. Despite the fact that I don't like feeling like I'm somehow misrepresenting myself, I'm pretty much fine with that when it comes to my family.
post #85 of 108
4/16/06 at 1:16am
Well... there are 5 pages of responses here and I haven't read any. I am not new to the Mothering board/community, but certainly new here.

I 'came out' to my husband 2 years ago. I was kinda' figuring on having a supportive response after being married for so long... and it was supportive at first. He encouraged me in my search for a girlfriend, but soon found he was not ok with it. I dated one woman for 5-6 months, then broke-up because it was too much stress for him. He seemed to realize my pain, then we tried again. I dated another woman, fell very much in love, and he found it too difficult once again. I was left with a choice... either commit to monogamy, or lose him as my husband and the lives we have built together with 3 children.

Currently - I am in a "monogamous" relationship with my husband, but still very much in love with someone... what should I call her... my girlfriend? my lover? my friend?

I resent my husband and his lack of support/understanding for my sexuality. It was difficult enough for me to come to where I am, but to be chastised and given the threat of abandonment on top of it? I don't know. I am frustrated and angry most days. I love the freedom to be able to say "I am gay" many days, but at what price did I pay for it? It's too confusing of a place for me to comment fairly about it.

But now I am here... where I am... feeling pretty secure about my sexuality, but inhibited by my marriage.
post #86 of 108
5/3/06 at 6:38pm
I wish I had time to reply to all the interesting stuff I've read on here.

I've been through the crappiest experience. My (ex?)girlfriend was a mom with two kids. And her marriage totally blew up partially because of the relationship she had with me (although more because her soon-to-be-ex-husband is an abusive jerkoff). And the whole thing was really terrible, and turned into a huge nasty divorce, which I ran away from (to London).

So, I have some issues.
post #87 of 108
5/3/06 at 6:40pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by dawnadelle
Well... there are 5 pages of responses here and I haven't read any. I am not new to the Mothering board/community, but certainly new here.

I 'came out' to my husband 2 years ago. I was kinda' figuring on having a supportive response after being married for so long... and it was supportive at first. He encouraged me in my search for a girlfriend, but soon found he was not ok with it. I dated one woman for 5-6 months, then broke-up because it was too much stress for him. He seemed to realize my pain, then we tried again. I dated another woman, fell very much in love, and he found it too difficult once again. I was left with a choice... either commit to monogamy, or lose him as my husband and the lives we have built together with 3 children.

Currently - I am in a "monogamous" relationship with my husband, but still very much in love with someone... what should I call her... my girlfriend? my lover? my friend?

I resent my husband and his lack of support/understanding for my sexuality. It was difficult enough for me to come to where I am, but to be chastised and given the threat of abandonment on top of it? I don't know. I am frustrated and angry most days. I love the freedom to be able to say "I am gay" many days, but at what price did I pay for it? It's too confusing of a place for me to comment fairly about it.

But now I am here... where I am... feeling pretty secure about my sexuality, but inhibited by my marriage.
(((hugs)))
post #88 of 108
5/3/06 at 7:32pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by pinkmilk
And I'm way too busy with my family to start a group here.(And I'm in red-neckville so I doubt anyone would come anyway)
Hey, I'd go! And I live in Red-Neckville too That group you were with in Kelowna sounds wonderful, I'd love to find a group like that!
post #89 of 108
5/4/06 at 1:26am
*waving to Dawn*


(Psstt, I'm Red from BiMamas.net)
post #90 of 108
5/9/06 at 12:24pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by pinkmilk
I use separate e-mails for different things and I NEVER use my real last name for anything online. That way my private life can be kept private, my past can't bite me in the ass and I don't have to worry about my safety in cyber space.
Unless someone prys into your hard drive, or you ISP records, or the NSA is monitoring you.
post #91 of 108
5/10/06 at 5:07pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by MammaKoz
Hey, I'd go! And I live in Red-Neckville too That group you were with in Kelowna sounds wonderful, I'd love to find a group like that!
Are you my queer neighbor?
post #92 of 108
5/10/06 at 5:07pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by TexasTomboy
Unless someone prys into your hard drive, or you ISP records, or the NSA is monitoring you.
Hey...stop that!!!You're feeding my paranoia!!
post #93 of 108
5/10/06 at 5:09pm
Geez... I haven't been around these parts for so long I can't believe this thread is still active!!!!

Actually I can believe it cuz us complex bisexuals are so very very interesting!!!

Aren't we?
post #94 of 108
5/11/06 at 12:45pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by pinkmilk
Hey...stop that!!!You're feeding my paranoia!!
In my experience, the mix of men and jealousy are a dangerous combination.

:
post #95 of 108
5/11/06 at 12:49pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by pinkmilk
The funny thing is that I do know a couple moms who are a part of this mothering forums community and well they don't know I'm bi (but if they come across this then they do now!). I've been feeling a bit nervous of them finding out this way cuz all they need to do is look at my profile and see all my posts!! But I want my friends to know who I am so I guess it's O.K.(just not the best way to tell your friends your gay!
I U!!! hee hee, 'sokay I'm bi too
post #96 of 108
5/16/06 at 8:35am
Just reading through this thread.....

This weekend, I briefly mat a lesbian couple with their twin girls at the shoe store. I chatted briefly with them. I just wanted them to experience someone being supportive of a loving lifestyle. What I wanted to say was, "Thank you for choosing to live as you are. There was a time in my life where I could have taken a completely different path. Now, 4 children later, I still look back and say "what if..."

I am honest with my husband. I am married. Being married doesnt change who I am. I am in a monogomous realtaionship and just like a "monogomous married straight woman" who looks at another man, I will always look at and fanatasize about another attractive woman. It is human nature. I do believe that most women have it in them to be "bi". Who doesnt check out other women? Women are beautiful, men are.... well, men...

heh.
post #97 of 108
5/21/06 at 11:54pm

This is HARD

I met my Dh when I was 16. This didn't give me much time to explor my sexuality before I met him. On the day before we got married, I had my first experiance with a woman. We had a three year relationship, and we eventually shared it with my husband the night before she moved away. She moved to Cali and I when she came back, she stayed with us for a couple of days. She slept with me, while dh slept on the sofa... His choice. Since then, I have had other experiences, but only one other relationship. Her dh was overseas in Iraq. I talked to him on the phone and he was supportive... He looked at it like this... As long as she was with me and I kept her busy, she wouldn't find another man. Most men look at female realtionships as not cheating. My dh and I had seperated last year, for other reasons. Since we have been back together, I cant bring myself to ask him for his blessing to let me have a female (relationship) friend. I am however looking for one at the moment. If I find someone that is worthy, I will bring it to his attention. If he agrees to let me have this friendship, I will make sure not to let it interfear with my married life. I anyone feel the same?
post #98 of 108
5/22/06 at 3:21pm
ya...i totally get this. I am in the same boat too. I'm kinda looking(as much as a momma with 4 kids can look!!! )...i know i would be honoring myself on a level that most people can't understand and therefore being a better person; wife; and mother, because of it. I fear it to. I know in the past relationships inside of marriage can be good or bad. I fear hurting dh. Not because i would love this person more than him but what if he was feeling insecure about it...kwim?
post #99 of 108
5/22/06 at 3:36pm
Hi mamas I'm late to this thread, but just found it. I consider myself a bi mama too. I am currently in a comitted relationship with a man, but did briefly date a nice girl back in college. I could easily see myself being with a man or woman. I am attreacted to women just as much as I am attracted to men. However I could never see myself having a polyamorous relationship. I don't think it would be fair to my DP, and it's just not me. So, for the time being I am content with having a relationship with a man.

Its nice to see that there are other bi mamas around here.
post #100 of 108
5/22/06 at 5:04pm
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