Things you should NOT say to a very pregnant person. - Page 2

[Cigilteach]

This wasn't exactly said as such but...

a friend of my husband's mailed me some kind of holy clay from Ireland with a tag that said to save from "SUDDEN DEATH" along with a pretty baby blanket.

I couldn't even begin to tell you what crazy things have been said to me this whole pregnancy. I'm going to write a book on day. Total Twilight Zone stuff.

I have a friend (although she is quickly losing that position) who I have been trying to avoid because she and her kids are just too intense right now. SHe still calls every day although I never answer. She has taken to leaving messages like "we're just going to come by later..." and we actually lock the door and HIDE until they go away (I have confrontation issues : ) Anyhoo, on ALL of her messages, she starts out with something like "I know you feel HORRIBLE but" or "ugh, this pregnancy has been so HORRIBLE for you". Honestly, I never think of that adjective to describe this experience at all.

Another person knows of someone who had a rupture (in the hosp. - probably hosp caused). Rather than educate herself before opening her mouth she says things to me (re homebirth) "but aren't you afraid you are going to explode?" "what would you do if it exploded". I try to be patient.

And EVERYONE except dh speaks of my planned hbac as a cute wee dream of poor delicate flower me that is surely going to end in a c/section. Ugh!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for starting this thread! I needed that!!

J

[lesley&grace]

It's as though the larger/farther along you get the more insensitive people become.

At least that rude classmate of mine has finally stopped telling me that I'm "too big"...becasue of she had continued I might have hurt her.

My parents tease me because all my maternity shirts are getting too short to cover my belly. I have two shirts that come down all the way. Mom keeps telling me to go buy just a few shirts to tide me over...what she's not getting is that if I could FIND shirts that fit I would have ALREADY bought them. sigh.

[Adamsmama]

I'm 36 weeks now. I had people telling me months ago that they can't believe I have that many more months until my due date. I have had two people in the last week tell me the shirt/dress I'm wearing makes me look really big. "You look way bigger in that, etc." "You look like your going to pop" (what does that even mean?) I could go on and on. The last two times I went to 41 weeks and got the constant phone calls and questions.

[jennyfah]

Originally Posted by crunchy_mama

I have specifically not told any of the inlaws my due date because I don't want their medical hysteria surrounding me if I happen to go late. My mil especially drives me freaking batty she has asked me no less than 10 times my actual date.

Oh, yes. We haven't told my MIL our 'actual' date (or anyone for that matter) and she was less than polite about it. Also, she said "Don't tell me when you're in labor this time. It was the worst night of my life last time, waiting to hear."

Yes, and labor was a freaking *pleasure cruise* for me. And how selfish of me to not call and comfort YOU. (She only knew about the baby's imminent arrival because he was induced.) I can't talk about my MIL at prenatal appts. because it makes my blood pressure go up. . .

Needless to say, we're telling no one when labor starts this time!

-jen

[mclisa]

Originally Posted by CityChic

I just had something like this happen to me today...

I was taking the elevator down to the subway (yep, i am still taking public transit!) and a guy got on with me and another lady. He looked at me and said "are you sure we won't be too heavy, it only carries a ton". ARE YOU SERIOUS!

People just don't think...

Sorry, this made me laugh. Not funny at the time, I'm sure.

I wish people would stop looking at me and wishing me "Maybe you have a 9# baby in there." That's not helpful.

[LilMomma83]

My same coworker who asked me if it was safe now for me to have "emergency childbirth" (childbirth is a natural process - not on emergency!!!!) asked me today, "how long until you can be induced?" Well..first of all I don't want to be induce, I want labor to begin naturally; and second of all ---- I'm ONLY 37WKS!!!!

..I did get a kinder comment today though - from someone who has not seen me in a week, "are you due soon?" "3 more weeks" "I thought so, you look a little bigger than last week, and your also look like the baby has dropped some" --that I can deal with...unlike most people who don't even seem to have a reason for saying what they say.

CityChic: the elivator comment is HORRIBLE!!! That is outright mean!!!

UltimateSerj: there is no way someone could not realize you are pregnant -- people are crazy!!!

[Anglyn]

Originally Posted by Marcimama

You have those kind of inlaws too?!? Uhgg...mine went absolutely nutty when I went 13 days over last time. I guess it is because my SIL demanded that her Dr. to induce her at 37 weeks, because she "Knew her baby was too big." He was 6lb. 3oz. They didn't go nuts then! Sorry, totally hyjacked and ranted!!!:

OMG! They induced a preemie baby on purpose? Just because the mom was complaining? Thats medical malpractice IMO. Un-freaking-belivable.

I actually cannot believe the amount of people who reccomend that I get induced. It's crazy. My last baby was due in January and I cant tell you how many told me to induce in december so I could get the tax credit for that year.

[Anglyn]

Ok, from the time I was about 30 weeks or so, Ive had several ppl that I know who ask every time they see me, "Havent you had that baby yet?" I finally started repling, "No, and its a good thing too, or he'd be in the NICU." I mean, wth? Anyway, my mother tells me all the time how hard this pg has been on me (it hasnt) and a friend who keeps saying, "Yeah, I know your ready to have this baby, I know how hard its been" (again, Im not and it hasnt). Even if I WERE, those comments arent so helpful. and again, everyone wants to know why I dont just go in and get induced and get it over with. Lets see, what else has annoyed me?

"Wow, youre ready to pop"
"You must have swallowed a basketball"
"Stop keeping that baby all to yourself"
"Your doctor wont let you go past 40weeks"
"Whats the holdup?'
"Are you holding him for ransom?"
"You just dont want to share"
"Are you still working?"
"Are you still here?"

Ok, and even "How do you feel?"
Not that they dont mean well, but I get asked that like 100x day!! To be honest, its one of the reasons I decided to go ahead and start my leave early, so I can hole up in my house and not answer the phone and not talk to anyone!!