My ds is also 4.5 yrs old.
I really appreciate moms on this thread saying that they have enough stress with one kid, let alone more than one. That's how I feel but it is so taboo to say it IRL. Especially if you are a SAHM. And someone even mentioned not wanting to or being able to (sorry, I'm tired, it's nighttime here in Europe) spread the great love she has for her only on to other siblings. I can totally relate. But again, that would sound weird if you said it out loud IRL. : Like you are hoarding all your love and giving it only to this one person.