We aren't sharing the whole story... (added-Noah was a twin) - Page 2

[~Megan~]

The dystocia could happen anywhere. Telling people that would give them more ammunition against HB.

I'm so sorry about the loss of your little twin.

[kittn]

not in your DDC however wanted to offer a : and tell you that my first child was also a twin. his twin stopped developing early. it was a very sad and difficult thing to come to terms with. be easy on yourself and take time to be sad

[LilMomma83]

I just want to say congrats on on both your babies, and I am very sorry to hear that you lost one of your babies...and I think you are totally right to mourn the baby's life. Maybe your DH is just mourning in a different way.

[Pynki]

NOt in your DDC, but my ds 2 was a vbac and had shoulder dystocia. He was born with a broken clavicle by an OB in a hospital. I was actively pushing for like 4 hrs, and given that fact that he was a VBAC, and with an OB in a Hospital, I'm suprised the "let" me push that long.

[quelindo]

Not in your DDC either, but I wanted to give you a . My son was also a homebirth, and also stuck in the birth canal at the very end. His arms were all intertwined and the midwife could not pull him out. After about five minutes (his head was out this whole time) she had me turn over onto my hands and knees (I was so exhausted I could barely do it), reached in and re-arranged his arms, and pulled him out. He was this dark, dusky purple color and didn't really cry for a long time. My DH and I didn't really know how serious it was until it was all said and done, which is probably for the best, really.

We got pregnant doing in vitro and two embryos were inserted. Only one made it. So while it isn't the same as having a twin die in utero, I'm still sad sometimes when I look at my son and think about the other embryo that didn't hang on.

[neetling]

[rachelagain]

Oh Elise, I'm just sitting here with tears in my eyes, I'm so sorry this has been so much and such a bitter sweet to have one healthy baby and one lost. I know there is nothing anyone can say to ease the pain, it just something you go through. I don't know why these things happen, it makes no sense, but I know that precious little one is in a wonderful place and one day, you can see meet them and know them like you long too.
It did help me to name my little ones, and I'm glad you are letting yourself mourn. Don't blame you dh either-- they feel so different then mothers do about this.
My heart aches for you.
Love and prayers-
Rachel
PS- when sharing the loss of Noah's twin w/ people, you are bound to hear some difficult things- people intend to be helpful, but it would just be better if they kept their mouth shut. Don't take it personal, they are just trying to sort it out in their own minds.

[MamaPam]

[crayon]

Oh hun, I am sorry your birth was tramatic. Your fear must have been unreal. I am glad your little boy is healthy.

I wanted to comment on the leg pain- I had the very same thing with my first DD- it was more painful than I ever thought I could deal with. I would have just cut my legs off if someone would have given me a knife. I self transported to the hospital and the nurse said this is normal- that they see this kind of pain often- but I never hear women talk about this pain. So, to you, I understand- and I am so sorry!

It is amazing how the body works- how your mw was able to see that and show it to you.

[scbegonias]

Elise, many hugs on your traumatic birth of Noah. I'm glad that things are going well for him now. I'm sorry for your loss of his twin...what a difficult thing to process at this time. Stephie

[rubyruby]

I can't imagine going through that, and then to learn about his twin!

[HeatherB]

I'm a member of the Sept '04 club, too. I'm so sorry that you had to go through such a difficult birth! On the other hand, I'm awfully proud of how well you handled it and that you DID do what was necessary to get your baby out. I can't imagine the trauma of it, but you are definitely to be commended.

Blessings as you enjoy your new babe, process your birth, and grieve your lost twin.

[MonTana Mama]

Thank you for all of the loving support! I am feeling better about it now that I have shared my experience w you. And you with me.

Thank you! I will have DH read these as well.

[lauraheartslittle1]

OP, glad your ds is doing okay.

Originally Posted by Pynki

NOt in your DDC, but my ds 2 was a vbac and had shoulder dystocia. He was born with a broken clavicle by an OB in a hospital. I was actively pushing for like 4 hrs, and given that fact that he was a VBAC, and with an OB in a Hospital, I'm suprised the "let" me push that long.

My niece was born by repeat c-section (SIL had section with first two babies). Her clavicle was broken during her delivery. Eep... We're still trying to figure that one out since it wasn't an issue of vaginal birth and pressure from pushing.