Thank you so much
I actually searched your posts last night, and saw that you had outlined your agreement in a previous post, and the parenting plan I'm drafting right now encompasses yours nearly to the letter
I've made it age appropriate, 1-4 yrs, then 5-12, then over 12. Which makes it WAY more confusing, but stbx needs all the clarification he can get. And I'm concerned about traveling time/visitation time being age appropriate, etc. That way he cant balk completely. I definitely did not move with his consent, in fact I believe he said he would have me arrested, but he had no legal grounds to do so (I researched VERY thoroughly before I left the state, and paid an extremely overpriced attorney $220 for a consultation just to make sure I wasnt doing anything illegal). That being said, he does NOT want our child in another state, and has filed for divorce in our residential state, I think in the hopes that he will get joint custody, which will force me/our child to move back there.
I will concede to sole physical and joint legal, except that I am worried that means I will have to OK everything with him regarding schools and medical decisions. I'm anti-vax, he's pro. We also disagree on circumcision. Ds is intact, but I truly worry that stbx would go get him circumcised without my consent. He feels that strongly about it. So I worry about letting him have ANY legal/medical decision making power for those reasons. But I'm sure I will have to concede somewhere. This thread has saved my ass in so many ways, I'm VERY thankful to everyone who has posted input here
Although another question - what is reasonable in terms of monitoring emails/written conversations between the Non-custodial parent to the child? I suppose that would apply to phone calls as well. I don't want to be nosy, and I feel that (especially when ds is older) their relationship is theirs alone, but stbx has expectations of a 14 mo. old that are ridiculous. He insists that I call him EVERY day to talk to ds, and of course, ds doesnt know how to TALK, let alone carry on a conversation. He gets distracted and drops the phone, wanders off to chase the cat, plays with the buttons and hangs it up. And stbx will call back 4-5 times! Its driving me absolutely
. Our baby is ONE YEAR OLD! And stbx is annoyed because I keep it on speaker phone, I guess assuming that I'm eavesdropping. But if I dont keep it on speaker, ds cant hear him because he doesnt know to hold a phone to his ear - again, HE'S ONE! Does anyone have phone time/electronic communication "guidelines" outlined in their parenting plan? Stbx is also very controlling (of me) and I think its his way of talking to me, albeit vicariously. Also to see if I'm home, etc. He's driving me batty. I need to have some obvious boundaries written in the parenting plan about phone time/privacy. Any suggestions would be great.