I feel like my family gets the short end of the stick because I am frequently spread too thin.
I want my son to finish school right away so that he will be able to focus on whatever he wants for personal goals.
This isn't very coherent. If I had been FORCED to learn how to stick to something that I didn't enjoy until it was finished I would be having a much easier go now. I want these things for my children.
my point being, that this is something we as parents do, so i don't think your motivation here is unimportant.
i've also noticed the disparity between responses from and about gifted children. for some, they feel it mattered being in gifted classes and it didn't seem to affect others.
i've seen gifted kids in the school where i substitute and one of them is about 65 pages ahead in his math book because he just keeps working. another one is about two grades below where he needs to be on his computer programs because he gets frustrated with the little animals that dance around as a *reward* and just keeps clicking the mouse until they go away, which usually makes his next answer wrong.
the bottom line is that you know your son. i think there have been several good comments here about communicating with him and retesting with an open mind.
and you know what? my brother (the one that quit high school at 14 and now has an excellent job) *never* got the point of doing work he didn't want to and he still has managed to be fairly successful. he is 24 now and working as a cable installer but he's making a little over $4,000 a month and has full benefits.
i've been amazed at his ability to survive in this world without selling out and doing anything he didn't want to do. he has a very strong sense of himself and i think as much as everyone tried to squash it (his school, our family) because he needed to "learn that you have to do things you don't want to do" it never worked. and in a way i'm kinda glad though it was very frustrating to deal with.
remember, any decision you make is reversible and fluid. try it one way, if it doesn't work, try it another. you just want to find what works for your son like any good mom!