~Weekly Thread April 30- MAY 6th!!!~ - Page 3

[saratchka]

Oh, Willo! I'm so sorry your friend cancelled on you. Can you call the contractor and ask that he make it Thursday or Friday so you can get there tomorrow?

Wish I still lived in the Boston area! I'd have been glad to give you a lift to Woburn. Sadly, I'm in NY. (Oh, how I miss Boston!

[awallrising]

Wombat- I'm sorry about the dual tantrums. Your father sounds a lot like my G'ma. My G'ma literally would (& has) eat a box of candy until she pukes. When she eats she stuffs her mouth while she has cheeks full of food & then chokes. Oy!

I am kind of pissed b/c we (DH, me & Aunt) all decided that G'ma would not come to my shower this Saturday & now she seems to be coming. She can't handle groups of people, won't remember it, needs constant supervision & half the time doesn't even realize that I'm PG while staring at my belly (she just keeps telling me I'm fat). So my Aunt ends up talking about the shower in front of G'ma & then takes her shopping for party supplies. Since G'ma seems to be having a few lucid days, she of course remembers everything that's going on including the shower & is insisting on coming (most days she can't remember to put her Depends on). I feel like my Aunt pulled this passive aggressive thing b/c she couldn't deal with the guilt of not bring G'ma to the shower & I am really pissed. It's literally like taking care of a bold 2 yr old, only worse. I didn't invite children to my shower b/c I wanted to have an adult party. I feel like my needs always come last with my family & I do so much for them. Argh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Enchanted Gypsy]

Still no baby here, and I am due June 1 st, or 5 th, depending on which of the THREE care providers I have been with say.

I am now 35 weeks going on 36 and switching yet again, for financial reasons. We will now be having a home birth at my inlaws house, instead of the birth center/bus birth. The reason is I found a midwife who will take me for 1,500 instead of 2,500 out of pocket for me (plus 3,500 paid by insurance).

I go for my first apointment with the new gal on Fri and am so relieved to finally know where, for certain, I will be giving birth. It's also nice to know I can just stay here and not have to get in the bus and drive 90 miles to the birth center in labour.

Is anyone else due around June 1st ? To me, I feel like it's gonna be May twenty something..

~ Pixie

[awallrising]

Pixie, Sorry to hear about your troubles. I just can't understand why people are so heartless. I hope the article continues to help you & that some of the idiots who seem to dislike your bus so much feel guilty now knowing about your coming baby & plans to buy a new house.

The inside of your bus is beautiful. Hope you have a beautiful & healthy baby & that these negative events soon become a thing of the past.

[firefly mama]

A few days ago and i wouldn't have necessarily agreed with daily naps, but now...YES! A morning and an afternoon one would be nice. Maybe even an evening catnap too...

Full moon has me nice and irritated. My bowels are totally clearing out and contractions were a steady 8 min apart last night, but lots of rest and water has calmed them down today. We're cleared for our homebirth now, but I'd prefer my baby bake until at least 37 weeks...which is only 10 more days...but still... DD was born 5 days after a full moon...so that would be maybe Monday or so? I'm still focusing on after Mother's Day though.

[willoLevin]

By the time DH got home from the airport last night, I was pretty much a puddle on the couch. I guess I've come down with a cold (I thought it was allergies) which probably contributed to my total lack of composure yesterday afternoon...

DH convinced me to wait until tomorrow (Thursday) afternoon to go to the floor place with Nancy (the original friend, whose opinion I really want.) His point? "You're sick and you're pregnant and the guy said most floors could be had within a couple of days."

Basically, I should be able to find SOMETHING that will be "in stock" and at hand within 2-3 days, even though some less common floors might take a week. We can live with limiting our selection somewhat to keep the crazy, mildly ill, preggo woman from total collapse.

I'm a real phlegm-ball today. : Sore throat, painful throat-clearing and coughing all night, sneezes and fatigue. Luckily, I don't feel too cruddy in my nose/ears this time, so I'm less worried about infection than with my two dreadful February colds. I hope Cory (my acupuncturist) can treat me for the cold and do the blood-building points. She tries not to do too many points at once for a pg lady.

I'm going to try to find someone who could cover for me at work tomorrow morning. It might not be necessary (let's hope for a quickly clearing cold!), and it might be hard to find anyone (since they scheduled me due to having trouble getting someone else in the first place), but I know it will be a relief not to worry about it (because of my cold) and I am sure I'll have more energy for the floor expedition if I don't work the first half of the day. Oof.

Wombat-- so sorry life is getting so stressful for you now. I gave you my cold-fighting tips in your other thread about it. That is really tough about your dad. My grandma has Alzheimers (sp?), but she is living in a care facility now... She did well in assisted living until she fell and broke her hip, then required more care. Basically, she can't remember why she's being forced to do painful physical therapy, so she kind of gave up and is now confined to a wheelchair, mostly because she just won't do any exercises. It is so hard, and so weird, to deal with someone who is the same person you grew up knowing and loving, but... well... not really them anymore...

We've got a cloudy/rainy morning today, but then things are supposed to get nice again here. I'm hoping for a nice pollen-clearing from the rain, then a lovely dry stretch to melt the mucus out of my head/throat/chest!

I'm going to concentrate on sending out every kind of blessing and goodness to everyone today. Maybe if we all do it, we'll all have better days today!



--willo

[mrsalf97]

I'm starting to get in panic mode. I still don't have everything I need and the house is a wreck.

[Jilian]

Hope you feel better Willo. I hope everything works out for the best with the kitchen.

Christine: The full moon gave me some "action" last night too. DP was getting worried that I was in early labor. I asked the baby to nicely stay in for at least another week and so far he's cooperating

Pixie: Congrats on the switch. Late May sounds nice, I'm due a few days after you on the 4th.

Wombat:

Jstar: Yay for the progress! Every little bit helps. I broke down and checked my cervix last night and I was a bit effaced, I'm not sure what the percentage is. I'm trying to not take it as a sign that labor is approaching because that makes me nervous.

I've decided that I'm not emotionally ready to give birth yet. I'm pretty positive this is my last pregnancy and I'm getting sad that it's ending soon - even though it has been an uncomfortable pregnancy. I just feel really sad at the thought of it ending. I'm also worried about how DS will feel about the new baby, we're really close and I don't want him to be hurt. I guess I should work through these feelings so they don't stall labor.

[wombatclay]

willo- I'm so sorry you've got a cold too! I hope I didn't pass it along through the internet!

I think I need to talk with my care provider about being put on short term disability. Obviously I'm doing too much for my body to be able to cope well right now, and the only thing I can think of that can give is my WOH job. But only if I can get the disability (since I only have a few days of sick time saved up, and we NEED the paychecks for as long as possible in order to try and make it through my "pay check free" maternity leave).

Right now I've got the two jobs (reference librarian during end of semester/finals, and free lance writer with 10-12 writing assignments "due" each night for the next 3-4 weeks), caring for 2yo dd, and caring for my dad (statin allergy induced dementia, bipolar manic depressive currently off meds while they try to adjust a few other medications he is on). So even if I can take a day off from "work" all that really means is spending a whole day caring for dd and father, instead of a half day.

Bleh...I know whining doesn't get anything done, but sometimes it helps to just get everything out there! So thanks for "listening".

And maybe my docors will be sympathetic and put me on leave! Last time (different care provider) said something like "so, is there any chance of going on disability before the babe arrives?" and they were like "Sure! How about tomorrow?". So it could happen. I NEED the sleep. Or at least the illusion of sleep.

[WhiteWax]

Wombat

mrsalf97

Willo

awallrising

Did I miss any one??? here are some extra's


Jillian:

I've decided that I'm not emotionally ready to give birth yet. I'm pretty positive this is my last pregnancy and I'm getting sad that it's ending soon - even though it has been an uncomfortable pregnancy. I just feel really sad at the thought of it ending.

I'm with you here!!! And for other reasons too... for the sadness of the lack of a nursery... not to mention everything else I'm missing.

On that note, I can't, for the LIFE of me, get a therapist to call me back...: I'll have half a day where i think I'm doing great and then the other half I'll slip back into that total deprssion where I just want to cry or lay down or crawl into a hole.... I'll think I'm doing good and then have more VIOLENT and ANGERY dreams.... they are NOT pleasent. I'm NOT a violent, or even particuary confrontational person but for some reason "in my dreams" holds true here. It's ruining the precious little sleep I do get. I dreamt last night the "other girl" was at my house... and I was SCREAMING at her to leave, and get out! Then, either in the same dream, or another, I'm not sure: I dreamt that DexP told me he wasn't going to play games anymore and he wanted to work things out with me. That he would see a couples therepist with me and work on things. I told him that he would have to change his behaviors too, that I wasn't the only one who had to change... but it was all just a dream... I woke up even sadder then when I had went to bed....I dont know how to deal with all of this!!!

[willoLevin]

Originally Posted by WhiteWax

... I can't, for the LIFE of me, get a therapist to call me back......

Aren't you a student? Or are you going back to school in the fall? (I get people's details mixed up--sorry!) Maybe either your school's health services or your insurance company can get you a reference to a therapist? Or even your regular doctor or your OB/mw can refer you to someone? Even if that someone just referred you on to yet another someone, it sounds like you need an "in" to get a call back in your area. Good luck!

--willo

[WhiteWax]

I'm going back to school... in the summer...

My Midwife had given me a list of Therepists to call.... probelm was there are only three on the list that are in my area... which would be fine except...

One is a Christian counselor (which is all well and good but my MW suggested trying some one else because of my religous and work history... she mentioned seeing some one a bit more "open minded" lol)

The next is an Avid Tennis player where DexP work and wont take me for that reason.

The last simply wont call me back... I have left a few messages but got nothing in return.

As for my REGULAR Dr's office... the referal service was the one who had originally set me up with the couples guy who made me state my weight and was just a total all around jerk! So I tried to call my Dr, for a direct reccomendation from her and was told by the Nazi front desk that I would have to wait till next week to talk to her!!! Teribbly frustrating!!!! My regular Dr, is also my Mom's Dr and my Mom has an appointment tomorrow. I'm just going to have her ask the Dr for a name or two for me...

I guess I'm just particulary frustrated because I would have liked to have a session or two before the baby got here, but knowing how long every one makes you wait..... ::grumble grumble:: AND.... just to irritate this whole situation a bit more, DexP had an appointment yesterday with some one (he has a more common, and thus more widely accepted insurance) and he MISSED HIS APPOINTMENT!!!!!!!!! grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I know it's not really my place, but I feel like he needs this just as much as I do... not to get back together with me, but at least to be a well balanced person and thus well balanced father and co-parent... even if he's not my partner.

Thanks for listening to my rant!

[Jilian]

That sucks Whitewax, I'm sorry Do you have any free or reduced-cost mental healthcare available in your area? You may qualify since you are now technically a single mom.

I have some whining to do, I hope you all don't mind. I'm uncomfortable. I feel huge. I'm crampy. My boobs are sweaty underneath. It's so freakin hot in FL. I'm tired. I'm swollen. My cervix hurts. I can't sleep. I feel just like I did during the last week of pregnancy with DS - like I cannot fathom being pregnant for another week. I swore I would never complain about the discomforts of pregnancy when I was dealing with TTC for 6 mos, but here I am complaining : Don't tell on me. I just feel yucky. Blah. And I feel like a jerk for being annoyed with the discomforts of pregnancy because my baby needs me to stay pregnant for a while longer. At least one more week.

[Shell_Ell]

Jilian I know your post wasn't meant to be funny but I laughed out loud about sweating under the boobs. LOL!

Just checking in... been feeling pretty good here. I got a little weepy this morning... I was awake for a few hours in the early morning hours and couldn't fall back to sleep. I was just thinking about how much I'm going to miss DS being my "baby". He's still so little.

Tonight I'm a little sore and crampy... today I was working outside in my flowerbeds and potted a few geraniums for my front porch. Between that and walking around the store, I was about spent by 3 pm.

Midwife appt tomorrow. I'm hoping to talk out some fears with her. They are really creeping up lately.

[vannienicole]

**

[willoLevin]

Woke up at a much-too-early 5 am due to coughing and a very sore throat from mouth-breathing caused by the stuffed up nose. : It just drives me bonkers how long these "minor" illnesses are lingering during pregnancy. Blech. I've got to see if I can get in to the acupuncturist tonight. DH said he'd come home early, so maybe I can get a little relief if Cory can fit me in. :

vannienicole brings up a point I'm curious about:
How much preparation for birth are the 2nd+ timers doing?

Part of me feels like I should really be "preparing" for labor and delivery. Most of me is fairly blase about it and saying, "Hey, my body knows what to do. We've done it before. We just prepare mentally and then ride the wave..."

I'm just curious how others are approaching their "not first" labors.

--willo
(who might just be too lazy to read birth books this time? )

[Corri]

I hope you can get in to see your acupuncturist, Willo - colds right now are the absolute worst.

Prenatal class was much, much better last night, so yay! They're run by public health, but are surprisingly AP - pretty much everything the nurse said last night I've already read in Dr. Sears, so that was very cool. One of the couples was asking about feeding on a schedule (every four hours), and the nurse emphasized over and over that babies need to be fed on cue, not on schedule.

She talked about babywearing, and how worn babies cry less, and then she got the question - the "can't you spoil a baby by responding to their crying all the time" question, and was very adamant about it not being possible to "spoil" babies, and how they're way too young to be manipulative. I don't know how much of it sunk in, but it was really surprising to hear all this from a public health nurse after all the stories on MDC about mainstream medical care!

She also came down like a hammer (a respectful and diplomatic hammer, but there was no question what her policy was) when someone asked about crying it out - she talked about a whole pile of different options to help babies get to sleep and learn to self-soothe, some of which I hadn't thought of, so that was awesome.

And it turns out that the local hospital policies about the baby testing and things coincide with our birth plan beautifully - they wait a few hours before weighing and measuring baby, and while they do the eye drops pretty soon after birth, they automatically hand baby to mum for tummy time during placenta delivery, and they don't wash the vernix off unless you go out of your way to ask for it. The nurse was making jokes about not scraping it off with a squeegee, just letting it absorb naturally, and so on. So, yay! I'm more and more pleased by local policy the more I learn about it.

A couple of the mouthbreather husbands left their wives in the class to go to a hockey game about halfway through, and a different couple of guys were joking about not having to go next week when we get the breastfeeding class since it has 'nothing to do with [them]', but whatever. It just makes me glad that DH isn't like that.

[wombatclay]

vannienicole brings up a point I'm curious about:
How much preparation for birth are the 2nd+ timers doing?

Well, last time I attended (with DH) a series of discussion/classes offered by the Ithaca Birth Group (founded ni the 70s to support homebirth, now they support all different types of natural birth). We also took a "techniques" course from the birth group...basically 5 weeks with each week covering two different birth prep techniques. So, for example, one week might be learning/practicing meditation and visualization, the next week might be lamaze style breathing or bradley focus, another week might be more "birthing from within", etc.

It was a lot of fun, DH and I had a good time, the other couples were great. The goal of the techniques series was to provide a sort of "buffet" approach to different coping skills, the discussion series covered all sorts of topics and included birth videos and guest mamas who had delivered recently, and there was a seperate breastfeeding class that I took through my care provider that was basically the same group of women (the discussion series had a breastfeeding class that partners attended, the seperate BF class was mamas only and was much more "technical").

I also did a prenatal yoga class, and a kripalu dance kinetics class (though I'd been doing the dance kinetics for a year or two pre-conception). I modified my belly dance practice and spent a lot of time journaling and meditating and focusing on the coming babe.

This pregnancy has been VERY different in terms of pre. I re-read a few books including Birthing from Within, Kitzinger's Guide to Pregnancy/Birth, Ina May's more recent one (since my OB is in the book nd I wanted to re-read her birth story!), and Simkin's The Labor Progress Handbook. I've also been focusing a lot more on the optimal fetal positioning stuff. but I haven't really done much "pregnancy" only stuff since I just don't have time!

I'm doing the HypnoBabies home study course (half an hour each night after dd goes to bed), and I'm walking a lot, but really that's about it! Some RRL tea, a few doula visits, the time I spend here at MDC, and...well...

Just generally keeping my finger's crossed and my thoughts positive in terms of a quick, healthy, happy, easy, VBAC in two-3 weeks.

[nadia105]

Willo, with my second, I did WAY less prep for the birth than I did with my first. No classes or anything, but I had read the Ina May books (hadn't done that the first time) and got a lot out of those. I found myself looking past the actual birth quite a bit b/c I was concerned about how I was going to handle two kids 20 months apart. Everything went really well, I think a relaxed attitude about the birth process helped!

This time, I read the Ina Mays again at the very beggining of this pg, and nothing since. I should probably pull those out again to get more in the 'zone' of birthing.

[momtokay]

this is our third. we're taking a "refresher" childbirth class on saturday. i thought it would be nice to take a few hours to focus in on the big event that is about to change our lives so dramatically. i'm so busy with my other two that i feel like i haven't given the time and focus to this pregnancy that i was able to give my other two. i had a pretty positive birth experience with my second and i'm feeling pretty ready to go through it again even though i haven't done a ton of prepping this time.

going to see the midwives again today. i can't believe how fast two weeks goes and that by my next appt i'll be cleared for a homebirth. eek!!!