how to determine if its bullying

[mommy68]

How do you determine if your child is being bullied. I have a child in 5th and he said he was knocked down the other day by another child who raced by him. He fell and hurt his wrist. He said he didn't see who the other kid was. I feel like he is lying to me in order to hide the fact that he knows who it was and is afraid for some reason or another to tell me.

My son also told me about a month ago a girl in his class pushed him down (on purpose that time). But yet this time around he says he has no idea who knocked him down and it was an accident. I don't believe him. I KNOW my child better than anyone and I could tell he was very upset when he told me about falling down. I'm sure he was a bit embarrassed too but it upsets me that someone may be bothering me and he is afraid to tell me for some reason.

I don't understand why my child won't tell me who did it. I wonder if I should ask his teacher if she notices anything in class or should I just keep my mouth shut? It's almost the end of the school year and everything. I just don't want to be the naive parent that doesn't notice things her children are going through. Thats how my parents were and I went to school in terror for several years when boys would verbally bully me and say mean things to me.

[lauren]

Schools are at least trying to take bullying seriously now. It wouldn't hurt to ask the teacher, but it will depend on the teacher's style what he/she will consider bullying too. You know your child best. Was there an evasive look in his eye when he told the story? Perhaps revisiting the story before bedtime or something would get out more IF there was more to get out.

[velochic]

I think kids are sometimes just mean to each other. It doesn't really mean that it's bullying.

With bullying, one child picks another one to be mean to *all* the time. Day after day in all sorts of ways that also cause psychological stress.

From what you are describing, it sounds to me like just normal schoolyard confrontations among a variety of schoolmates. This is going to happen the rest of his life, so at this point, it's probably best to just try to help him learn to manage these situations.

If it escalates to bullying, you'll probably know it and recognize the difference.