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Unbelievable Adoption/Teen Parent Story (returned) - Page 4

post #61 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by Buddhamom View Post

tessie, would you mind if I PM'd you?
Not at all.
post #62 of 70
Diamond, have you asked your mother these questions since you live with her? I imagine having her own children she would be able to answer these and many more.
post #63 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by Buddhamom View Post
Diamond, have you asked your mother these questions since you live with her? I imagine having her own children she would be able to answer these and many more.
Buddhamom, I know you think this story has some inconsistancies and I admit it seems farfetched and I'm assuming at this point the thread will just die and we'll never hear from Diamond again.

However, I have to say that your above question isn't gonna draw her back to answer. It's obviously condescending. Why would ANY of us post on MDC? Is it because we forgot to ask our moms?
post #64 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by AladdinsLamp View Post
Sorry, I have to disagree.
I am in the US but my will designates my SIL will be ds's guardian if dh and I pass away.

I would be furious from beyond the grave if the state got involved and decided my precious son should be in FOSTER CARE with WHO THE HECK KNOWS WHO while they wait around to do a freakin HOMESTUDY.

Give me a break... That just does NOT happen unless the child is heir to MILLIONS of dollars.

The only other way something like that would happen is if some other family member got involved and challenged my guardianship documents and got the court to appoint a court appointed special advocate and then MAYBE they would request a homestudy and request ds be in the foster care system in the interrim. I REALLY can't imagine something more terrible for my ds though and I would HOPE that no family members would do something like that to him. I am just happy that my guardianship papers are drawn up by a REALLY good attorney.

I am FAIRLY certain that just as there are PRIVATE adoptions HERE, there are PRIVATE adoptions in the UK and all babies privately adopted don't go in to foster care for 6 weeks... She did not say this was a foster-to-adopt situation.

And I am disapointed in the tone of some of these posts...

if you are responding to me - i was not talking about a child being in foster care during the homestudy. i know it differs from state to state, but in at least some states a family adoption would require a homestudy. if this is really concerning to you, perhaps you can try to find out the laws for you state regarding the requirements for a family adoption involving a will. if you're just speculating about uk adoptions, tessie has already shared some great info that she has, and i'm going to see what i can find out on my own (since i am now very curious).
post #65 of 70
I'm also concerned by the thought that the guardians named in my will might not automatically get my children, and that there might be some outside fostering done against my wishes. If anyone finds out any info, could they please post to this thread?

In my case, I do not need to fear that a b-parent would get my kids, but an impersonal judge definitely should not be allowed to override my decision on guardianship. I didn't name anyone in my family for a reason, KWIM?
post #66 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by Buddhamom View Post
I am a bit confused here. When children are adopted, the birthparent's names is removed and the new parent/parents are put on there. How was your name still on the b-cert?
This was not the case when I relinquished my birth daughter for adoption in 1995 (here in the states, GA).

Her original birth certificate, of which both I and her adoptive parents have a copy, clearly states my name as her "Mother".

There is an amended birth certificate for legal purposes that the adoptive family received after the adoption was final, but the original document still exists in the state records, along with the amended document, and my name is still there.
post #67 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by Individuation View Post
You know, it seems to me that a few posters on this thread are either questioning the veracity of the OPs story (which is a violation of the UA) or are snarking about how she somehow shouldn't legally be entitled to be reunitied with her child under these, notably extraordinary, circumstances. Come on, people. Ana is lucky enough to have a mother to go to after her tragic loss. I really don't see where the problem is here.
Thank you!!
post #68 of 70
Thread Starter 
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post #69 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by VegHipMama View Post
I'm also concerned by the thought that the guardians named in my will might not automatically get my children, and that there might be some outside fostering done against my wishes. If anyone finds out any info, could they please post to this thread?

In my case, I do not need to fear that a b-parent would get my kids, but an impersonal judge definitely should not be allowed to override my decision on guardianship. I didn't name anyone in my family for a reason, KWIM?
Okay, I did some research on this when a mom on another board I read lost her partner.

Essentially, because she was a same-sex partner, even though she was named guardian and they'd filled out all kinds of legal papers, her partner's family tried to contest the guardianship and were partially successful.

What i found out from my research at that point is this: A statment of guardianship in a will is considered a STRONG recommendation that a judge will USUALLY grant.

But, as one source said, "Children are NOT personal property." That means that they cannot be disposed of as such by means of only a will. Guardianship can be contested by anyone with an interest in the child's well-being or with knowledge of something about the guardian that might affect the child's well being.

Your will is a pointer as to your wishes in that matter, but if someone manages to convince a judge that there's a reason your guardian is unfit, or even that they would make a better guardian, they can try.
post #70 of 70
She's lovable. The best way is to just take one step at a time.

___________________
Girlie
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