Bright Kids

[serenetabbie]

My DS (5) has been identified as "bright". As he is entering Kindergarten, they do not have a "gifted" label. he will be going to 1st grade 1/2 the day and K 1/2 at the local Catholic school. the public school wanted to take him out of class for 4 hours a week to "work with him". I feel this 1/2 and 1/2 will be better suited for his needs. He did not go to prek. Then he gets to be a little kid and play with those in his age group, but still be challanged. They told me that by the middle of the school year he will be moved to first/second grade....putting him 1/2 a year ahead until 7th grade when he can take High School classes.

Now, he is by no means a little genius....just a bit ahead, kwim? I was wondering if there are other mamas (I am sure that here there are!) out there who have kids who are a little or a lot above average. Can we start a thread for support? I would love to know what you guys do in certain situations. For example.....he can read very well. People will hear him read things in the store and say "Oh! He's short for his age isn't he?" or some stupid comment about why isnt he in school. I tell them he is homeschooled . What do you say to people who get defensive about their kids? Like my freind was aking about what level DS was at as far as colors...and I said 'well, he knows his primary and secondary colors, and we are working on tersciary colors now'...she looked at me like I was insane and told me "oh, i dont push my kids to learn"! *sigh* How do you talk about your kids without sounding like you are just having yourself a big brag fest?
BTW sorry about any typos and spelling errors...I sure am not above the bell curve by much! :LOL

[joesmom]

Hey!! I can kind of relate to your situation, my ds is four &, although he has not been tested, i think he is above his age level. He knows all his letters & can write very legibly. (I tell him how to spell the words, he cannot spell yet!) He is very good though, at hearing words & telling me what they start with. Whatever he is interested in, we learn about, & he loves to color & draw & build with legos etc.

We are going to homeschool him because I think if he were in school he would either be understimulated or below his peers socially, the program you have for your ds sounds really good though. I don't know if there is anything like that around here.

As far as people thinking we are pushing our kids to learn, it might be they are insecure about their own kids, or they could be the type who would criticize no matter what we said. i mean, joe has known his shapes & colors since he was TWO for Pete's sake.

I'm sure your son will do great, you will have to keep me posted on how he likes school. My nephew starts in the fall & he is SO excited! Good luck to you.

Love, Jenny

[serenetabbie]

Thanks Jenny
We were going to home school him (as you know Jenny), but he has been almost begging to go to school. If we had stayed in the other town we lived in, we would have had a wide variety of schooling choices for him. Here we have 4....home school, charter school, Catholic or public. I was sooooo unimpressed by the public school here. Talk about understimulating.
Thomas knew all his shapes/basic colors at 2 also...but he did not talk until a little over 2! It was so bizzare, I would say "where is the square" and he would point to it or draw it. Then i got..."he's a little big not to be talking" : But, he started talking all of the sudden.....it was like the flood gates had opened!
I dont really like labels at all, but it is sort of nice to know I am not the only one who thinks he is Bright

[joesmom]

re: latetalking

my nephew did not start REALLY talking until recently, he will be 3 in Oct. now he talks up a storm, good to know there are others out there who are the same. potatoes gonna burn, more later!!

[mamaduck]

Yeah, we "pushed" ds ahead a year this year, and there are people who disaprove. He was in pre-k last year and totally bored. The kids were working on the numbers 1-10 and he was adding/subtracting double digit figures in his head, and was doing single digit multiplication (also in his head.)

He has enjoyed 1st grade this year immensely. Everyday he came home bright eyed and happy with the challenges. Even there, he seemed to blow the class away in math -- he checked 6th grade math books out of the library and taught himself about prime numbers and square roots. :

He learned to read this year in 1st grade -- and by the end of the school year as reading chapter books to himself.

I dunno -- socially, things went fine because he's attending a small alternative school. The kids seem like extra-nice and very sheltered sorts. We might not have pushed him up if he was going to go to public school around here. But OTOH -- I just can't imagine he'd have been happy in Kindergarten.

But I do feel akward trying to explain to people why we did this. Most people seem to doubt that we had his best interests in mind. I just want him to feel stimulated and satisfied, you know?

This is a big part of the reason we didn't homeschool. He just wants more than I can give in terms of being constantly challenged with new stuff. I know there are lots of mamas here who *do* feel able to feed that sort of hunger and I certainly admire and respect them for it! But I really just felt like I needed some help with ds. He had 5 teachers this year -- 2 in his homeroom, an art teacher and a music teacher and a spanish teacher. He formed really beautiful trusting relationships with each of them, and really just SAPS the information out of them everyday. I'm so grateful for their help with him!

[serenetabbie]

Mamaduck, glad you replied That school sounds just great! I went to an alternative school for a year and it was wonderful....but I am the type of person who enjoys independent study. I feel my son is like that too. All he needs is a little information on something that catches his fancy and he runs with it. Right now we are learning all about chipmunks *sigh* what would you like to know about chipmunks? :LOL
Would the public school in your area just have taken your DS out of class? I don't really understand how that could help a child (any child) learn.
How old is your Ds now? I can completly relate to the " people seem to doubt that we had his best interests in mind." thing. One lady actually told me I did my son a disservice by "teaching him too much".

edited to say DUH! I see your "1996 and 2000" dates on the bottom! So your ds' are 3 and 6?

[mamaduck]

Originally posted by serenetabbie

Would the public school in your area just have taken your DS out of class? I don't really understand how that could help a child (any child) learn.

I'm not sure what you are asking.

If he had gone to public school, it would have been straight into Kindergarten. Unless we had him tested and they approved him to "skip." I would not have put him through the testing though. Or myself through the red tape. And the public schools here are a bit on the rough side, so I wouldn't have wanted him to be the youngest in his class.

For private school, we as his parents were able to apply to whatever grade we chose. We talked with the teachers extensively, and they had him join them for a day last year to make sure he seemed ready.

[serenetabbie]

what I ment was.....in the public schools here, they give a standard test for admission into Kindergarten. It does not matter how they do, they all go into the same class. So, If the child gets a high score, they still go to the regular class. BUT they are pulled out 2 to 4 hours a week for "special education". They don't like to skip kids here at all, feeling that they need to be in their peer (age) group. ITA with this, i dont want my boy in a class with much bigger, older kids....but I think that taking him out of class for a few hours is silly. What will he do the other part of the day? Be bored?

[mommy22]

My kids are above average, but they go to a Montessori school, so they just do what they are capable of. They are still with kids their own age/peer group, but when it's time for a math work cycle, my kids do what they are capable of, and the other kids do what they are capable of. It works really well, and none of the kids think any differentyly of each other based on what kind of work they are doing in school.

[bestjob]

serenetabbie, I don't think that a bright kid would sit around and be bored if he weren't in special classes all the time.

In some schools, the children would be in the same classroom for the rest of the week, but they'd have the opportunity to work independently on other projects. Also, much regular classroom work is easily adapted to many different skill levels (reading books at different levels, writing stories with varying levels of sophistication) and much of what happens is independent of what the child's intellectual capabilities might happen to be (gym class, computer and library time, playing in the playground, free play with building and art materials, music and singing time, or adult-led craft and cooking activities). Not all activities work that well, though, so for a child who is advanced at math, a few hours a week would give him interesting challenges, and the special-ed teacher could give him material to work on while the other children were working at their regular grade level.

[serenetabbie]

I agree that would be great and the bright kids would not be bored in a class like that. Unless, of course, they were very gifted....some kids I know were very bored in school with that sort of program and now their mamas are h.s. them.
I went to a school like that and enjoyed the independant study. I asked if our P.S. had a program like that and they said no. : I guess it varies by state.

[LunaMom]

My DD, 4 1/2, is very bright and is quite advanced linguistically. I worry about school because she has a late birthday and misses the cut-off for kindergarten, so she will be a few months shy of her sixth birthday when she starts kindergarten. She can read and write about as well as an average first-grader right now, and that's with very little help from me. I am very worried that she will be bored to tears during reading lessons in school, and she is the kind of kid that might be a behavior problem when bored (who isn't?).

It can be hard to discuss these concerns with others because they often suspect you of bragging, or at least give you that, "oh, yeah, you have BIG problems..." look of sarcasm. Sure, I'm pleased that my daughter is bright, and I'm not above admitting that it gives me a little thrill that she's reading and writing, but I am truly concerned. I figure I'll send her off to kindergarten, be in close contact with the teacher, and see how it goes.

Serenetabbie, as far as your son is concerned, I would worry that all that switching around may not be good for him socially. I think, especially since this is his first introduction to school, that it would be best for him to be in the same class all day. If I were you, I would have him in the regular kindergarten and see how he does. A skilled teacher should be able to challenge him with higher-level reading work. Certainly there will be children with a range of abilities in his class. This is what I am hoping will happen with DD. My other option (if my district allows it) is to skip her to first grade, which is not as bad as it sounds because the youngest kids in first grade will be only a month older than her. Is your son a young or old five?

This is sort of rambling and disorganized, but I hope I've been helpful in some way! Anyway, I hear ya...

[serenetabbie]

I am very worried that she will be bored to tears during reading lessons in school, and she is the kind of kid that might be a behavior problem when bored (who isn't?).

YES! That is what I am saying......same with my DS. My nephew had this problem and the school suggested putting him on drugs for ADD. My SIL paid for the testing, switched school districts and now he is doing fine But can you imagine all those bright kids, acting out because they are bored....drugged into submission? It breaks my heart.
Lunasmom, Thomas is a middle 5...he has a March birthday. So at the end of the school year he will be 6.
IKWYM about the social skills. That is why he will be in K for part of the day. He has met the kids in the first grade already (they are in K this year) and they got along great (we went for 2 trial days this spring). The teacher and principal suggested he go in with the first grade for the academics and stay with the K's for everything else. The school is very small, with about 10 kids Thomas' class so far. When the kids get to 6th grade, all the classes are combined with 7th and 8th. From 7th grade a child can go to the private high school if they are ready. So moving back and forth is not unusual in this particular school, and I doubt Thomas will be the only one doing it. All the kids know each other since the school is so small.
I am so glad you understand what I am trying to say. I look forward to hearing how your kids are growing