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Going from 2 to 3 children?

post #1 of 35
Thread Starter 
I am sure this has been posted before but.....how hard was it REALLY for those of you who went from 2 to 3 kids.....PLEASE be honest! I have heard that it isn't a big change at all and then I have also heard just the opposite...Just wondering what I am wanting to get myself into!

eta: I plan(if dh decides that he agrees with me ) to have them each(dd1 and dd2 are exactly 23 mos. apart) 2yrs(about 23-28 mos.) apart.
post #2 of 35
It hasn't been too bad for us. Both of our age gaps are 32 months. Our biggest challenge was going from zero to one. DD1 was the most challenging baby and has continued to be the most "tiring" of our children, if you KWIM. She also started kindergarten (full-time) just 9 days before DS entered the world...so, that has made a difference too.

Both my girls love their little brother to pieces and have excepted him wonderfully! That has made it easier too!

Good luck!
post #3 of 35
Were about to do this in a few momth (TTC). My ds will be at least 5 and my dd will be 4 when #3 is born if I conceive when I hope to. I think it will be fairly easy seeing as my first 2 were 14 months apart.: It was almost like twins b/c the oldest has CP and they hit their milestones at almost the same age.
post #4 of 35

Very easy for us

the initial transformation from 1 to 2 was hard but 2 to 3 was really easy
post #5 of 35
Two to three was easy for me. It was 0 to 1 and then 1 to 2 that got me. However, DH thinks #3 was harder. But I think that's only because #3 is a girl (as first 2 are boys). He's been MUCH more involved with DD....(not to mention she's got him wrapped around her little finger) so that's probably why he thinks it is harder.
post #6 of 35
I found from 2-3 a bit harder than the other additions. But mine are 15mtnhs and then 12mnths apart, so my problem has been three carseats, and the fact that oldest dd couldn't really walk for long if we went out. She is getting a little older now so it is getting easier. Also just the fact that you are now out numbered, can make your head spin, but you get used to it pretty fast. I think these types of issues you can't really prepare yourself for, every childs temperment is different and you can never know how it will be.
post #7 of 35
It was hard....well...it IS hard now. Everyone I know says 2 to 3 is the hardest transition. DH says its because you go from man to man to working "zones"!
post #8 of 35
For me one to two was a piece of cake. They were also almost 9 years apart.


Noe being PG with number three I was horribly ill and then going from two to three was alot harder than the one to two.


But not "end of the world, I want to cry all day" hard!
post #9 of 35
For us 0-1 was easy. Then 1-2 was great, 4 1/2 year difference.

THEN....

Number 3, WOW, that is hard! Only 21 months difference. I find myself chasing a 2 year old and running with a 2 1/2 month old in a football hold! While hollering at #1 to keep up! Some days I think that I must be quite a site!!!

I also only have very spirited children.:
post #10 of 35
We're talking about having our third and I'm a bit worried.
Like a pp said, it wouldn't be man-to-man anymore. Now we can say "ok- I have her, you have him" or vice versa. I think it's going to be tough.
Our second and third will be at least 3.5 years apart, though, since dd will be 3 this fall.
post #11 of 35
going to 3 was the easiest for us so far! ds1 is 9 and very helpful and dd is 4 and very calm and easy-going. so its not stressful to have to meet all the baby's needs. plus the older two can play all day together.
post #12 of 35
We're talking about this as well. I found going from 1 to 2 to be rough for the first several months (mine are 24 mo apart), but if we had a third, my other 2 would be 7 and 5 so my new concern is getting back into the "baby" groove after being used to independent creatures for so long LOL! Plus, I was in my 20's when I had #1 and #2 but my mid 30's if we went with #3.

It's a hard decision for us, because we knew we wanted 2 but aren't sure about 3.
post #13 of 35
Easiest so far for me! I mean there is an adjustment period no matter what but it was not bad. My first two are 1.5 years apart. My second and third were 2.5 yr apart.

I'd like 3 yr. but it wasn't bad.
post #14 of 35

Thank You so much

Hi, I am in the exact same situation. My DH and I completely agreed on two kids and left the option open for a third. Now, my two DS's are 7 and soon to be 3. We are discussing a third and how much it will change our lives and our household. (we'll also need to move) Our boys are both easy going, calm and well behaved. We worry that we are due for a " more difficult" child. Plus so many people around us have said that having a third is much more difficult. I am pretty sure that we are going to TTC but nothing for sure. I am so grateful for people who are in the same position. Thanks so much for all of your postings.

Julia W
post #15 of 35
1-2 was the hardest without a doubt and 2-3 was no biggie, we were pros and had already been doing the baby thing for four years

Good luck in whatever you decide!
post #16 of 35
Well, a family dynamic could be set with 2 parents and 2 kids. You have not only the relationship between the 2 parents to work on/in/with, but the parents to 2 kids and 2 kids with each other. I'm going to start sounding like Kierkegaard here with the relation relating to the related and the relating :

When you introduce another child to the family, there is that many more relationships going on--everyone to this new child and each other.

For us it has been a huge transition from 2 kids to three. It isn't because our children are well-behaved or difficult (attention: all children are well behaved and difficult at different stages. Don't get too comfortable ). It is more that logistics are way more complex now. Of course it will get easier as the baby grows older.

Mine are just turned 6 years, 3 years and 5 months.

I think the greatest thing about having a third child is the sense between my kids that they are now a significant mass, they are a 'gang' and they belong to each other. The way my 2 boys look and interact with their baby-sister is beyond beautiful.

So, of course it is difficult; but what else would I do? Read another book, draw more, or hold another beautiful baby?
post #17 of 35
For me the transition from 0 to 1 was the hardest. With #2 it was very easy, that is until she got mobile! Now #3 is here and it has been cake. Of course he is just getting ready to become mobile, so there could be a big change soon!
post #18 of 35
Easy as pie!

Really. First babies, are, well, first babies. Going to 2 kids was, well, twice the busyness. The third has been a breeze.
post #19 of 35
honestly..................:
: : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : :


just be SUPER organized
post #20 of 35
we have three daughters all two years apart.
From one to two was so easy.. I hardly noticed a difference at all. My oldest was sweet and helpful and my youngest was an amazingly calm baby. They loved each other from the first time my oldest nearly tipped over the bassinet trying to get a better look at the baby... I was in heaven.
From two to three was shocking! I was not prepared for how different our lives would be. In planning I didn't understand why having three would be any different from having two, but I was only thinking in numbers... not ages.
My oldest was four and she started terrible three's at three and a half. Good times... lol.. my middle child was two and while she loved the baby, she didn't always appreciate NOT being the baby anymore. So if my oldest pitched a fit, my youngest would start to cry so I'd be trying busy trying to calm the both of them down, and my middle child would become beligerent because she wasn't getting all the attention and she is BY FAR the drama queen, when she gets mad at me, she's mad for a couple of hours! Three little ones was fairly crazy.
Now that they're a bit older its amazing.. My oldest is old enough to help the other two with anything and she gets to live the good life because she's the oldest. My second loves being the middle child cuz we're always aware that she's the middle child and so we make sure all three of them are treated equally. If anything my middle one gets alot of attention becuase she's sweet enough to give you a cavitiy is you stand too close!
And my youngest is just damn adorable.. right now we're all in perfect balance! We'll see how things go with the next one!
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