DH seems to be changing his mind

[Ravin]

I thought I'd made it clear from before this preganancy even started that I want a homebirth! But DH is trying to get me to consider the local hospital birth center, and I'm so mad about it but he just doesn't get why.



It's looking more and more like we're going to have to pay out of pocket for a homebirth, and we're really, really strapped right now (DH has been unemployed since April and can't collect unemployment). I've applied for public assistance, and will probably still be on medicaid when the baby comes (any job DH gets is unlikely to have insurance that kicks in for it). I'm researching the stupid hospital and an OB/CNM practice that does deliveries there and takes medicaid for the CNM's.

Would it be unfeasible/unreasonable to suggest seeing them for needed bloodwork (mostly I'll probably want my thyroid checked at least once more while pregnant) and prescriptions (I really need a different prenatal vitamin and my thyroid med will need a new scrip since I moved from TX), and as a backup (rather than relying on whatever backup doc the hb midwife might have) should I need to go to the hospital, but a CPM or LM and still plan on the homebirth? I think that way DH would be reassured (the hospital is only a couple of minutes away), we would minimize costs by having medicaid pay for labs and such, and I could still get my way.

Also, does anyone actually know of medicaid paying for hb midwife in AZ? the MANA website says they do, but I have yet to find a direct-entry midwife who's been thus compensated. (Though hospital-birth and birth-center birth CNM's I have found).

[Spark]

((((Ravin))))

I know this is not easy, but it sure it good that you're exploring your options sooner rather than later. What i didn't gather from your post was if you've found a homebirth midwife or not. And, what she says about being reimbersed by Medicaid. Have you found a homebirth midwife yet? Has your husband met with her?

My husband was very concerned about the cost/safety of homebirth until... my midwife talked with him. She told us, "Wherever the pregnant woman wants to have the baby -- believe her."

The midwife you feel most comfortable with may have some other financial alternatives for you? I'd hate to see you not have the birth you want.

Wherever you deliver may the birth of your child be peaceful, beautiful and joyous. Blessings.

[Arduinna]

your plan sounds really good. I know my MW would have gone for it. She was very willing to work with me to avoid extra costs, and fine with any Dr as back up.

[StarMama]

I'm using my insurance with Kaiser to cover all my lab work because we too are tight on cash and paying out of pocket for our midwives (who sadly can't accept our insurance sniffle sniffle). I haven't told Kaiser what I'm doing, I just double up on my appointments (one per month with Kaiser AND midwifes). Once I have all my labs completed I will ask for my records, and if neccisary my midwives will give me a form to get my records (if Kaiser isn't co-operative about giving me a copy) for them. After I finish all my labs I just plan on not making another appt with Kaiser and just using my midwives. However, I will still pre-register with the hospital just in case there is an emergency.

I understand how stressful it is to try to plan a homebirth with little to no extra money. Right now depending on if some money issues get straightened up or not, we may have no choice and not be able to homebirth with my midwives. I'm thinking positively though and hoping for the best!

Good luck!!

[cottonwood]

I also had Kaiser insurance with my first, and used it to have the initial exam, labwork, ultrasound, and first birth class (which was worthless yet very instructive, if you know what I mean.) I didn't have any more appointments with the OB, but would have had no qualms about "using" him in that way if I'd felt it necessary.

Some midwives will do sliding scale or trade... even if you really can't afford it, don't give up hope!

[StarMama]

My midwive's fee is set. I REALLY like and trust them (they have a LOT of experience)... but if things get really tight and I simply can't afford them I will ask my doula if she has any other midwives in the area.... perhaps one of them would be a sliding scale, or allow me to draw payments out longer, or trade for housekeeping or something! But I really want to keep the midwives I have now.... so we shall see.

[Ravin]

There is a midwife I did a phone interview with before I got out here, and after looking around for others concluded that if I go with a homebirth she's the midwife to go with. But I haven't called her again because if I'm not going to do a homebirth I don't want to waste her time.

[Spark]

Ravin, if you really want an assisted homebirth you are not wasting the midwife's time by meeting with her. You still don't have the whole story until you talk with her and find out about your options.

Setting up a meeting with the midwife, your husband and yourself would really shed a lot of light on the subject. But, maybe you feel good about the birth center now that you have more info about it?

Right now deciding against having a homebirth (if it's still what you want) is like wanting to go to attend University, but not having the money and not wanting to get information on student loans/scholarships/work-study. You don't have the whole story. You just know how much tuition is and how much you have in your checkbook. There may be other options. But, you won't know unless you set up an appointment and explore your options.

Wherever you choose to deliver, I wish you a peaceful beautiful joyous birth. Blessings to you and your family.

[Ravin]

The latest update is that DH changed his mind again. Why? Because it looks like they're going to turn me down for AHCCCS. This is incredibly screwy, but apparently because we can afford our rent and utilities and have paid them (although absolutely nothing else including food), we must, by their rules, be lying about DH not having a job, since we can't "prove" where every penny came from. (It's hard to prove under-the-table odd jobs and gambling winnings, which is what's kept us from sinking completely while DH continues job hunting). Therefore, I don't qualify. Didn't know I'd have to be evicted or have my phone turned off or whatever in order to get medical care while pregnant.

So, current plan is pay out of pocket for homebirth midwife + subsidized university women and children's clinic to get my thyroid tested and new prescription for medication, and in the event of my having to go to the hospital they'll do an immediate application for AHCCCS there because it's illegal to turn away patients in an emergency.

[Ravin]

Well, I had my first appointment with the midwives, and they were wonderful! Gave me a letter to turn in to my caseworker at DES that will hopefully help. Only problem will be coming up with $1600 five wees from now if DES turns me down--if not, there's a good chance AHCCCS will pay for my homebirth. Yippee!