Does anyone else want to flog their partner?

[maisiedotes]

I am honestly ready to clobber my husband. I feel very bad about this but I need to snark.

I am going through the morning sickness, the constipation, the hormonal breakdowns, being tired constantly... I cannot get him to understand. The other night at work (we work together and this was at about 10:00pm) he wanted to stay after to have a beer. We had driven in together that day and I told him I was exhausted and would really like to go home. He begged me to let him stay for just one or two quick ones. I got really mad and called him a jerk, yadda yadda. Grrr.

Is anyone else feeling angry with their significant others?

[brooklyn_warbler]

my husband was a SAINT for the first 3/4 of the first tri, but in the last two weeks it seems he's gotten tired or frustrated with my total dysfunctionality (not a word, huh? ). we've been bickering quite a bit, which always leaves me in tears (because i am way too hormonal) and then FREAKING that this is bad for the baby. : i think we had a good talk about it yesterday though, so we'll see what happens!

[GinaRae]

I am going through a lot of this too, though he's been nicer for about 4 days now. He did tell me before the pregnancy that if I got so sick again he couldn't hack it, but you know what? I just want him to put his big boy knickers on and get over it already! I have enough to deal with.

[maisiedotes]

Originally Posted by GinaRae

I just want him to put his big boy knickers on and get over it already! I have enough to deal with.

No joke, GinaRae! We are all dealing with all kinda of krapola without dealing with their bellyaching! (teehee! I am not usually like this but man oh man, I am so mad at my hubby right now!)

[sorteep]

I can't honestly complain about DH's helpfulness or pitching in but I do want to strangle him when it comes to all the snide back handed negative remarks about this baby.. he is soooo not happy about me being PG,, thank heavens he has been mechanically (if not emotionally) supportive.. at least it's something..

Maisiedotes, you are a saint, if I had to work with my husband there would be either a divorce or a murder or both!! I can't believe he even had the NERVE to drag you out so HE cold have a beer at 10 pm after working all day.. yikes.. I would have had a FIT, you poor thing..

[Heffernhyphen]

It comes and goes . . . and that's normal. No matter how many times I read The Road Less Traveled, I tend to forget that when I'm in the midst of a clobber-him phase.

If you haven't read The Road Less Traveled, you should. He talks about how we hit that point in our relationship when the love of our life starts to really suck and we think, Oh shit, what have I done?!

But it's normal. It passes. Don't clobber him. Try crying. That will be more effective.

Now, I, on the other hand, may seriously have to clobber MY DH if he doesn't get home from HIS mother's soon and pay some attention to the mother of his child. Helloooooo . . . it's MY Mother's Day, too!

[Taradactyl3]

I was glad to read this thread today. Yesterday was hard for me. I felt so irritable and emotional. On top of it this lack of energy is ridiculous. I can hardly do anything w/o being wiped out for hours afterwards. I'm scared and frustrated and when I was crying and explaining this to DH last night he fell asleep. Part way through he "hmmmmm"ed like he agreed with me when I was telling him how I feel badly that I'm not doing much around here. So I guess he thinks I'm not doing enough either. Makes me sad and angry.

I'm so emotional and I keep beating myself up. I know a million preggos that take care of a toddler (or more) and can still do all the daily things that need to be done, so why am I struggling. I wanted this babe so much so I hate complaining, but life is so emotional and exhausting and frustrating right now. I'm a little afraid that 2nd tri boost of energy might never come.

Tara

[marisa]

My eyes welled up with tears so many times yesterday. I'm supposed to be past this ultra emotional stage, but yesterday pretty much sucked and the kids were tired all day and DH was snapping at them the whole time. He is tired of the extra load - and I'm just freaking weak and exhausted.
He flat out tells me he's ready for me to feel better and that he's tired of me being sick. He knows I can't do anything about it, and that I'm not just sitting around eating bon bons - but he definitely wishes I could get up and get more done.

[rubyruby]

Yesterday I would have said "No", my husband has been pretty good.

But this morning I was woken up by our FIRE ALARM at 5:45 AM because he had left a candle burning all night! It had burned all the way down, and since he throws the match into the candle each time he lights it, all the match sticks were creating a large flame which somehow the smoke detector picked up - I don't know how or why because there wasn't any smoke. But I am just SO grateful to have smoke detectors! We just built and moved into this house a little over a year ago, we would be so screwed if it burned down!

I don't know how to protect against this in the future. He comes to bed after I do and there's no way I'm getting up at midnight-1AM each night to check out the house. He regularly leaves windows open and doors unlocked overnight which drives me crazy. Ugh!

[Isaac'sMa]

Originally Posted by Heffernhyphen

If you haven't read The Road Less Traveled, you should. He talks about how we hit that point in our relationship when the love of our life starts to really suck and we think, Oh shit, what have I done?!

I'm gonna have to read that one! It sounds like us right now :

[maisiedotes]

Oh, and the real clincher is that I have become the "no questions asked" designated driver! Today, for example, he and a group of friends are going to see a fiddle session at a local pub. Guess who is driving, even though I had not planned on even GOING? grrr.

That's *it*. I am withholding sex till he starts smartening up.

[LittleBrownDog]

Ohhh I'm so glad to read this thread. to everyone!

DH has gone into major snarky mode. Then he'll be nice for a couple of hours and maybe put away a pair of DDs shoes and then go on and on about how helpful he is : Last weekend his mom was here and we went to the movies and I thought we had a good time but we got home and came into the house and he took DD and said, "You're driving me bonkers, we're getting out of here," and just left! At least he took DD, but he left me with MIL (who I love, but she's his Mom, I can't really bitch about him to her). When he came back I asked WTH that was about and he said I'd been nagging him about the table too much. Our kitchen table was in the middle of the garage because we'd had a garage sale and I couldn't park in there until he moved it. It's a big heavy wooden table, otherwise I would've just done it myself like I do everything else after a week of asking him to do it.

Anyway, I totally hear y'all.

[maisiedotes]

Ohhh, LittleBrownDog. I hear you! : My DH is SUCH a procrastinator, and then he complains to his mother about my nagging. WELL.. DUH! If he would just do it I would not have anything to nag about! He is a control freak. He will do things when HE is ready. I, meanwhile, am ready to wring his neck. It is endless.

[GinaRae]

I was just thinking that SOMETHING positive is coming out so far though. The hubby and I are not arguing over any decisions so far. Initially he wanted all kinds of tests, then easily just opted for an ultrasound around 20 weeks. I said okay.

He was cool with a homebirth and even thought of a water birth first. We're not fighting over names yet. He is okay with not circumcising if it's a boy. He's okay with my lead on delayed vax, etc.. (I am still going to have to do a ton of research on vaxing before babe is born!)

So it's interesting that those things are just falling into place like we've been doing this forever.