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spinoff--paying for college for your kids? - Page 7

post #121 of 195
Originally Posted by shayinme View Post
This is an interesting thread, it seems like those who say that the kids will get financial assistance such as scholarships or grants tend to be the folks who didn't go to college themselves.

This is not a slam but an observation both in this thread and in my own life, my ex husband seems to think that our son who will be heading to college in 3 years will get full scholarships to college. My ex did not go to college and I have a BA and a M.Ed that were financed primarily with loans.
That was going to be my other question as well!!!

What are the educational backgrounds of all the posters? Does your education influence your decision at all?

Where are all these people finding scholarships and justifying that their children will get these glorious scholarships because i've applied for 23984723984739284732984723 bazillion of them and stopped after i realize i spend so much getting official transcripts and denied by all of the scholarship institutions. I finally stopped applying because it was costing me so much money just to apply for them!

My ex and I are currently having the fight you and your ex are. I would like for him to pay half of her tuition to a private school, but he's arguing that public and private are the same (around here, they're not). Push comes to shove, if he doesn't pay, i'll pick up the slack and send her. It's not her fault that her dad and I can't agree on squat financially. I think again it's my responsibility as her parent to give her the best education possible, if that's a private school that makes me want to donate a kidney to fund her education- so be it. She's totally worth it
post #122 of 195
At this point I am too drowning in my own student debt (and not done racking it up yet either!) and DP is going back to school this fall. We probably won't be able to save up much for our kids, but I think they will all manage. I constantly kick myself for not staying home when I started school. if I had, I would have been able to pay for my undergrad myself with the job I used to have. I think there are ways to make paying for university/college easier but it requires some sacrifices on your kids part as well. I didn't expect my parents to pay my way and I'm not really that upset about the debt I have. I prefer to earn what I have on my own.

if I can afford it though, I will help. I sure won't pay everything though. and if they choose to move away from home, they'll be paying for that. paying tuition and books is the most I would do.
post #123 of 195
My kids will both have about $100K each by the time they are 18. I hope that inflation will not rise too much and that the money will actually pay for something -- like at least two years of a prestigious private college if they choose to go that route.

If my husband is successful in selling his company, than we will make sure they each have at least $500K for school and what not. Yes, $500K each. I want them to be able to get a Ph.D. if they want one, without incurring any student loans.

We feel it is our responsibility as their parents to make sure they can afford to go to college and graduate school. We do NOT want them to be handicapped by debt when/if they get their degree(s).

ETA: FWIW, I went to a City College and worked my way through, then got a full scholarship to Harvard for graduate school. I am one of the lucky ones -- no debt. My husband went to a local university and worked his way through, then got a full scholarship to MIT (Masters) and then Harvard (Ph.D.). He is also lucky -- no debt either. We have so much to pay with a mortgage each month and basic costs of living in overpriced Boston, we cannot imagine having to also pay off huge loans. We definitely do NOT want that for our kids. Should they get lucky, as we did, then they can invest the money we've saved for them.
post #124 of 195
To the poster who asked for educational background - we have diplomas from college (DH) and tech school (me.) We are saving as much as possible for DD's education, which probably won't cover all of it. We both paid for school ourselves, although at that time (late 90s) you could get a 2-year diploma without incurring too much debt. I still have the money my parents gave me for university - never went, never spent it, and am now planning to put it towards a down payment on a place. We both work(ed) in an industry where education can get you in the door, but doesn't matter much long-term.

I just want DD to have the best we can give her, and I'm hoping we'll raise her to be smart enough not to waste it. If she does waste it, well, it can't be worse than not having faith in her all this time. Now if she only masters sitting up....
post #125 of 195
We will pay for 4 or 5 years, at the going rate of in-state tuition (including room and board). If they would like to go to a private school, then they'll have to make up the difference in scholarships. If they choose to go to vocational or technical school, and if the tuition is less expensive than 5 years of in-state tuition (sometimes it's not, once you complete your training/apprenticship, ect) then they'll receive the difference upon certification.

And of course, we'll be willing to help them finance stuff and/or offer loans. The goal is to get them with a solid post-secondary field they choose. We're not going to check for grades (since it's really their grades and their business, technically and legally). It's our money and it's either gifted or not. If something happens in the future that leads us to reconsider (for example one commits some horrible crime, or becomes a substance abuser in which case giving them that amount of money w/o strings might be dangerous/unwise) then we will. But when we give it, there's no strings. There's a finite amount of money, we are teaching our children about money management/financial planning ourselves, it's up to them to make good decisions.

I'll cry with/comfort them when they make mistakes, but I consider paying for college a gift, not an obligation. I'd rather they learn about financial managment early, where there are consequences, but also a safety net, than to go crazy-nuts after college (like a lot of folks I know did, and are really paying for it now).
post #126 of 195
We will pay for DS's college. I actually changed my mind on this recently. Initially I thought he could do what I did (live at home and work his way through) but like many others posting on this thread, I realized that with the way college costs are inflating, the odds of him being able to earn anything that would come even close to paying for college is practcally nonexistent.

This goal of paying for college will probably mean that we have one child. But it is important to me to provide this for him. It will make a huge difference in his life and I want him to have a leg up in life.
post #127 of 195
My husband and I both chose to attend our state university because we both got full scholarships there. Also, we were both RA's, so room and board after our freshman year was free as well. We both graduated wtih B.S. degrees with no student loans.

We have a college savings fund for DD. I'd like to be able to pay for at least the equilivant of in-state tuition for all of her undergrad, and more if possible. At this point, I don't plan to contribute financially beyond her bachelor's degree though.
post #128 of 195
Yes. The children will contribute as they realistically can. However, we will foot the great majority of the bill. Not out of wealth or pleasure, but how else could they attend?

As difficult as it might be to help that much, we don't know any children making 45k a summer, although they must exist. (That's in 2007 dollars, in case this thread is revived in 2200 or something lol If so, -- the earth is either A. A crater with some Internet hookups and an underground MDC following. (Yeah, Peggy!) Or B. The cost of tuition for a child is over 500k/yr. And if so, raise me from the dead and tell me how much your kid makes each summer teaching Hover Tennis).

Ok then:

I would like to assure those who are making say less than 40k or less than even 60k, that they will get good free money if their child finds the right college. (Not all academic scholarships-- I have no idea where people think that the majority of undergraduate money can come from academic scholarships. (Smart kids are a dime a dozen. What schools want, and lack, are elite athletes. So get those dang tots out on the Hover Soccer field!).

Low income families with bright children (who test well --unless it's 2200 and they have abolished testing) won't have a problem.

Those making more than 50 or 70 k (In 2007 dollars) will have to pay a goodly amount on a 45k a year tuition. That's over half your income, so start saving, Don't move. Take care of, and perhaps make select improvements on your house, so that you can take out home equity loans. (Which is what some friends were told by their child's financial aid office. "You do not qualify for much financial aid, we simply can't give you this money. However, you have a lot of equity. Might we suggest using that equity to help pay your child's tuition bills?" I swear on my G grandmother’s grave ( g grandmother I adored) that this is a true exchange).

One can hope your child is one who wants to stay local and live at home. I am working on that as well.
post #129 of 195
Originally Posted by iamthesmilingone View Post
This is what I did to pay for my first year of college. It was all free while I was going to PSEO instead of my senior year. The classes counted as high school credits AND college credits. You just have to have a good gpa. My SIL started when she was a junior and got her AS at the same time she got her HS diploma.

This is what I'm going to encourage my kids to do. We will not pay for college, we don't have the means to do so. I'm paying for my college myself right now with 3 kids. My parents are not paying.
post #130 of 195
Changed my mind.)
post #131 of 195
Yes my experience has dramatically influenced my decision. I graduated with $0 in student loans (magna cum laude too... for people who think I would have pissed my opportunity away because I didn't pay for it myself, lol ). I got to go into a field I loved making peanuts but for something larger some day - a stepping stone to a better opportunity down the road that did eventually pay off. A very dear friend of mine basically took a job she despised because guess what, those loans started to be due and it was killing her - she based her decisions on how much money she would be making that year, not considering where her passion was or where she wanted to be 10 years from then. I took almost a year off UNPAID leave with each baby. She had to go back to work to keep paying her loans. It's not just in your early 20's when it hurts but potentially the impact can last a lot longer than that.
post #132 of 195
Yes. It will be paid for. All of it as long as they appreciate it. I think that 1. higher education is neccessary for most professions, 2. School is a full time job, and 3. If we have more than enough resources to pay for it and let them concentrate on school, we should pay for it.

FWIW, DH and I both have undergraduate and graduate (doctoral level) degrees. Both sets of parents paid for as much as they could, but that still left us with a good load of debt. We were very lucky to be in high income professions and got rid of it fast, but it's a burden we would not choose for our own children.
post #133 of 195
I don't know. If I can afford it, I will pay for it.
post #134 of 195
Originally Posted by Kajira View Post
my kids get a almost free first degree from my country of origin, since I own property and pay plenty taxes every year there you bet I'll tell them take advantage of that, then their second degree would be funded by family, if they choose not to do a second that money goes towards their first home
Damn, I have to know where this is?
post #135 of 195
We will pay for up to 5 years of in-state college assuming our kids will live at home while they attend school. If they choose out-of-state or private schools, or wish to have their own apartment during college, they can pay the extra costs.

I lived at home during college -- my mom paid all my living expenses and tuition fees; I paid for my books, gas, and car insurance. I graduated with no debt, took a few years off, then put myself through credential school, again graduating with no debt.
post #136 of 195
IN Georgia, undergrad education is free if you maintain a 3.0 GPA. This was how I made it through college completely debt free. And I actually profited b/c we were so poor I received a pell grant on top of it.

If my kids wish to attend college, they will graduate HS w/ a 3.0 and maintain that 3.0 through college. HOPE pays for tuition and $150 towards books a semester. I will cover any aditional book costs. If they wish to attend a university further from home, they will have to take out loans or save their own money to pay room and board.

The same scholorship covers TECH schools, and the same rules apply.

If this doesn't suit them, they are free to take out loans all day long, or join the military.

I will support them in the sense I will be their biggest cheer leader, and I will give them a place to live during college. I will not however foot the entire bill like it is a right.

And yes, a part of that is from how I had to get my education. I worked my tail off for it, and watched SO many people come in on Mommy and Daddy's dime and waste it by drinking and partying all the time. While I had a 5mo old baby and a husband and a full time job myself. But, to me, it's all about how hard you want it. If you want it bad enough, keeping a 3.0 is not that hard.

post #137 of 195
We recently found out about 529's and are planning to set one up for DS. You can buy tuition credits at the current rate, for when they go to school. So, even if the rates inflate 200% by the time they turn 18 and graduate, they will still go to college on the rates set in 2007 or whenever you started buying them.

You can also transfer them across to other states, or cash out if the child decides not to go to school (penalty and taxes), or transfer them to other family members.
post #138 of 195
We plan on sending our kids to college. We have529s set up now. I really hope we can do this. We won't be able to afford an Ivy League and our state has a really great scholarship program which I pray is still in place when my kids are in college. For those we say their kids can live with them I have to say that the college 'experience' includes living away from mom and dad. I would not want my kids to miss out on that. I did not do the traditional college thing after high school but my friends did and it sure seemed like fun! I wouldn't mind my kids taking a year off after high school to work and live on their own (they would foot their own bills during this time) to get a taste of what that is like. I think they would really appreciate college at that point! My feelings may change as the time gets closer....we have a bit. FWIW- when I decided to go to college I lived on my own and paid my own bills. I did have a scholarship which covered tuition. I worked really hard and was very tired!!! I was also very proud that I was doing it on my own. Never did finish thought dh and I got transferred out of state 1 yr before I got my degree.:
post #139 of 195
I would love to save for my kids' college, but right now I am just managing to afford to feed and house them, so saving will have to wait. My mom was a single mom and poor, and I had to rely on my own efforts to go to college, and I did fine. I did two years of Americorps to help pay off loans. But college is getting so expensive and financial aid keeps getting cut so I really worry about my kids.
post #140 of 195
IME, student loans are NO BIG DEAL. Together DP-PhD has 80,000 in debt. We pay about 200/month, according to the salary chart. THere is NO MOTIVATION to pay it off any faster. THe interest rate is so freakin low that there is NO interest. We were able to lock in on that right before it got raised 2 years ago.

We will not be saving for college tuition for our daughters. They can take care of it if they want to. I'm sure the grandparents might want to help a bit.

If we do manage to save some it will be to fund our daughter's travels and hobbies, which we will encourage them to pursue for a year or2 right out of high school. Or, if they want to go to school right away, we will give them what we saved. But, I really don't think we will save any. We send them to private Waldorf schools, so that's our contribution to their education.

I have a lot of faith that the educational costs levy is going to break by the time they are ready for college (in 16-18 years). I hope that by then, education should be free. There's already such huge signs of inequality -- the poor can't go as easily anymore since Bush lowered the $$ available, bachelor's degrees don't really cut it anymore, and unless you're a nurse, the most widely available jobs these days are hiring for associate's degrees or PhD's. Something's gotta change.
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