*update* Anyone already dreading sending their 5 y.o. to Kindergarten next yr

[~Megan~]

dd will be 5 yrs old in a few weeks and right now we are planning on Kindergarten in public school for next fall.

We live in the best district in the city (what does that mean exactly, anyway?).
I want to talk to the teachers and principle before we enroll her for sure.


I am so nervous! I've never left my child with strangers before or even an acquaintance.

And she seems so little to me! I'm worried about how she will handle all the other kids if they are mean to her.

ETA: its not full day, its 2.5 hours here


*****

Dh and I had a meeting with the Kindergarten teachers today. It went really well. They addressed all of our needs and concerns. We both feel really comfortable now. We are planning right now on enrolling her in Kindergarten next year and then we will re-evaluate as each year comes.

[wildmonkeys]

My oldest is going into 2nd grade next year, but I was really upset & worried leading up to the beginning of kinder. When you go in and talk to the teacher & principal, I would find out how many opportunities you will have to be with your child during school hours. I found that spending time in the classroom volunteering and eating lunch with my son both helped me to feel better and to get a handle on who some of the nice kids that he was clicking with were so that I could set-up some playdates. Having established friendships made a huge difference for how much he enjoys his time there.

Good luck - it is a difficult transition. My son actually adjusted much more easily & quickly than I did.

[Serendipity]

i completely understand. my ds started K last fall and i was such a wreck. he only went half day but i would drop him off and just be so nervous the whole time he was gone. it ended up really not working for us so we pulled him out and homeschooled the rest of the year. he's going into 1st this fall, at a much better school but i'm dreading it all over again.

is it an option to wait another year? i know my son could have waited as far as age goes, but academically he was ready. anyway, just wanted to say i understand. i hope it all goes smoothly!

[giggleball]

In our state they are moving the "cut off" date up to the beginning of August, though an early childhood specialist I know told me she wishes they would make it universally the beginning of May. Our son was 5 in April and we are giving him the gift of another year. He is ready academically but NO WAY could he hack a whole day of sitting still. Good luck to you!

[JanB]

My son is starting public K in the fall and I'm terrified too. I have no good reason to be, because we're in an excellent district, I've heard nothing but good things about this school system, and it won't even be that new for him because I've had him in a half-day Montessori preschool since he was 3. And, kindergarten here is only half-day anyway. But still, I worry that he won't make friends (even though he makes friends in like two seconds in every group situation he's ever been in), that he will have trouble with his schoolwork (even though his preschool teachers tell me that he is working on a K level already), that he will be fidgety and distracted all day (this one I fear may be justified), and that I will MISS HIM TOO MUCH.

Sigh.

The nurse at the OB's office today told me that she was digging through her son's scrapbook for old pictures because he is graduating from high school this year and I nearly fainted. HIGH SCHOOL?! I can't even deal with kindergarten!

[s_kristina]

My dd is starting summer school in a week and a half. Might not be popular around here, but I'm actually looking forward to her being gone : The summer program and kindergarten are both full day here. I have been to the school about a tenth of a mile up the street that she will be going to numerous times already. There was an open house in April with a tour of the school and we went through what a day in kindergarten is like. We just had her IEP on Thursday so I have now also had a chance to speak with the speech pathologist and more of the administration at the school. If we didn't live on this side of the island we would be working on getting dd switched to the school we are so close to here and lucky enough to be zoned for.

If I didn't like the school things might be different. If I didn't know that she needs more help then I can give her things might be different. If I didn't have 2 high needs kids things might be different. If I had more patience things might be different. However life is what it is and I'm very thankful to have a wonderful public school dd can attend. I also know that we have a number of magnet and charter schools nearby that we could move dd to if things did not work out well at this school. Now dh and I are both worried we will have a teacher at some point telling us that both the kids need to be medicated. We aren't up for drugging our kids to keep them still though. I'll just make anyone who suggests that spend a day with dh Easy enough way to see where they get their inability to be still.

[Amydoula]

DS is 5 1/2 and starting Kinder in a Catholic private school in September. I'm excited about the actual school and think he will do great there. he has had 2 years of part time preschool previously and is academically ahead. *I* am however completely freaking out b/c he is my only and it is emotionally hard for me to deal with his growing up.

[ChristaN]

Originally Posted by giggleball

In our state they are moving the "cut off" date up to the beginning of August, though an early childhood specialist I know told me she wishes they would make it universally the beginning of May. Our son was 5 in April and we are giving him the gift of another year. He is ready academically but NO WAY could he hack a whole day of sitting still. Good luck to you!

I don't know that the OP meant to discuss K cut-offs here. She does have the option to wait another year as do we all. My younger dd turned 5 at the end of Sept her K year. In her 1st grade class this year, there are kids from her age (young 6) to kids who turned 8 by the middle of the school year. I firmly do not believe that moving the cut-off back earlier would benefit all kids and that it should remain a parents choice. I wish that grade acceleration were also a parent's choice like retention or delayed entry is.

The research does not support the idea that waiting is a "gift of time," as you put it, for most children. It totally may have been the right thing for your child. It may be the right thing, or the wrong thing, for the OP's child or my child or anyone else's child. I think that her question, though, was nervousness re leaving her child with someone else and her baby growing up, not feeling that she wasn't academically or socially ready for K.

I cried, too, when my oldest went off to K. I think it is normal. Unless there is a greater concern re the school or the child's ability to handle it, I think that it is more of a mommy needing support to deal with the sadness we all feel when they start to venture further outside the nest. (My oldest is in 3rd now, BTW, and it does get easier. We are starting to allow her more and more freedoms and she is getting so big. I will never be the mom who is the first to let her kid to walk to school alone, etc., but sending her out into the world is getting less and less scary as I see her blossoming into a little lady who has a good head on her shoulders.)

[~Megan~]

Yes, I am concerned about turning my child over to someone else. She has never gone to preschool or any other activity alone. She has been cared for by friends while we see a movie and even spent the night with Grandma and Grandpa once.
She has not, however, been anywhere with people we didn't know very well and trust.

This is a huge step for us.

[jeca]

It was hard to send DD to full day kindergarten but it worked out great for her. We had issues don't get me wrong but she loved the year she had and I think it really will help her adjust to being a first grader this fall. Now am I ready for first grade, um no.

[mattemma04]

I am considering K for my son who was 5 in April.If it were still half days I would probably do it,but this fall they are starting full days. According to the articles I have read on it(local) they switched to full days because there was not enough time to teach the K children all they need to know. I really don't want my ds pushed to learn a lot for 6-7 hours a day(and then homework).

I may wait a year so they can work out the kinks in their new K curriculum.

I don't think our school has a walk through/day in K,but that would be really nice to *see* what the kids would be doing.

Perhaps there are some programs during the summer that your child can attend so she can get used to being on her own.

I felt the same way when dd went to 4-h day camp,or when she attended grade 1 ps for a few months. You are nervous,but you just have to hope for the best....and keep yourself busy while they are at class

[UUMom]

I am assuming you've made the decsion to attend? If you are on the fence, my post would be different. Although we've had lovely kindy experiences.

Three of my children attended Kindergarten and loved it. I remember my dread, esp when my oldest was starting out. I agree with others, the anticipation is the worst. Once you get past the first day, it's much, much better.

One thing that helped to relieve my anxiety was walking around the school with my child before K started (either now before school lets out, or towards the end of the summer, when teachers are coming back to set up their classrooms). Making the place familiar was helpful to both of us. If you are able, seek out the kindy teachers (you might not know what class your child will be in-- some schools are sticky about that), but introducing myself & my child to one in and all in calm, friendly way, was very good for us. Smile a lot, be postivie, introduce yourself to the principal, say hi to whoever you see in the halls. You are letting people know you plan to be a part of the community that way.

Remember, the teachers and staff are only strangers for a brief while. If you plan to be at the school for a number of years, you will meet and know everyone. Most public schools do not have huge turnover of staff. (Fpr better and for worse. lol)

[Lingmom]

I'm not "dreading" it, but I am a little bit worried about the experience. My five year old goes to a full time pre-school/day-care program and loves it, so I'm not concerned about the element of being away from her. I do want her to thrive at her new school too and love her teacher and friends and I have no idea whether she will or not.

We live in what is considered a low-income area and our local public school is said to be horrible and I've heard a lot of problems of bullying and poor teacher morale and lack of parent involvement and discipline problems. We lost at the magnet lottery. So we've chosen a small Catholic school down the street from us that has good reviews from parents. I hope it's going to be a good experience, but I worry. I suppose if it's not, we'll find a different solution. But still... I'm worried.

[Jillie]

I'm also dreading it. dd was 5 in January and will start full days in the fall. We haven't done any formal preschool or daycare at all. It will be a very new experience for all of us. We also live in the country so she will have to ride the bus. I guess our school is ok. we don't have a lot of choices here. the other school is similar but not located in a town, it is all alone in the country which we didn't like (even though it is the school dh went to). We were also conserned that it would be consolidated with another school before the kids were done, and that would take them farther away from home. I don't feel like the choice was made with the environment considered tho. Im dreadig the fall.

[BusyMommy]

Originally Posted by ~Megan~

Yes, I am concerned about turning my child over to someone else. She has never gone to preschool or any other activity alone. She has been cared for by friends while we see a movie and even spent the night with Grandma and Grandpa once.
She has not, however, been anywhere with people we didn't know very well and trust.

This is a huge step for us.

Have you considered homeschooling or finding a cooperative homeschool group? It may be more comfortable for you.

[~Megan~]

Originally Posted by BusyMommy

Have you considered homeschooling or finding a cooperative homeschool group? It may be more comfortable for you.

I have looked into them. When I posted this I was trying to explore all of our options.

[UUMom]

Whew! It's a load off your heart, isn't? When I first met my childrens' k teacher, I was excited for them. She was so sweet, and not crabby like mommy who was always tired. (She recently died of breast cancer, but what a legacy she left). My children have wonderful and warm memories of kindergarten.

[~Megan~]

Originally Posted by UUMom

Whew! It's a load off your heart, isn't?

Yes it is! I think I was on the verge of an anxiety attack before the interview, actually. I took a few doses of chamomilla and it helped a lot.