Do kids these days still have sleepovers?

[Nekawa Ma]

How does that work with households who have family beds?

[thismama]

Funny timing! My 3.5 year old just had her best friend, a 5.5 year old, sleep over last night. He wanted to sleep with her, she wanted to sleep with me. So we all slept in my bed: him, her, then me.

Worked great. Of course, our families are very close and I'm a single mama. I can imagine different family structures would face different challenges.

[UnschoolnMa]

When my kids were younger and other kids slept over they usually just crashed in the living room or the other bedroom together. (Even when my kids slept in my bed we always had a room "for them".. their toys, their clothes, etc.)

Of course now Dd is older and is off to spend the night at her friends house.

[wemoon]

We never had kids sleep over until my kids were in their own beds. I wouldn't have felt very comfortable with trying to figure it out.

[UptownZoo]

My kids all started having sleepovers around 8 years old, which in our family is long after they have moved into their own rooms. They usually sleep in the living room. My DD had a slumber party for her 9th birthday and it was the cutest thing, this heap of little girls sleeping like puppies.

My boys are not nearly so into it as my DD. Wonder why that is?

[Liz]

Originally Posted by UptownZoo

this heap of little [kids} sleeping like puppies.

This is exactly how my BIL described it when my son slept over with his 2 cousins and 2 of their friends! Apparently they were all piled in a heap sleeping on an air mattress together, all five of them. I wish he'd taken a picture!

I think I'd just ask your child, "Where would you and your friend sleep? Where would you sleep if you went to her house?" It's good to get them thinking about it from the other perspective. And the whole appeal of a sleepover is sleeping together and whispering and giggling, etc. You can't do that with the parents around!

[Ruthla]

I never had any sleepovers with friends before age 9 or so, and I made the same rule for my kids. They just didn't seem ready for sleepovers before then. And they had already graduated from the family bed at that point.

DD2 still occasionally sleeps in my room (in DS' bed). When there's a girl sleeping over, she sleeps in her own room (that she shares with her sister.)

So, co-sleeping has never been an issue with regards to sleepovers, at least not in my house.

[Kirsten]

Yes, kids these days still have sleepovers. Mine started at around age 6 or 7 with very good friends. My kids move from our room to their own at 3 months though so it was never an issue here. I do know one family IRL that did family bed - but she had a ds and I had a dd so the sleepover issue never came up.

When our kids have sleepovers here, they sleep either in their room with the friend(s) or in the living room. I wouldn't be comfortable with my kid sleeping in the same bed with her friend's parents. I'd never let her sleepover with someone I didn't trust, but I still don't want her sleeping in bed with adults.

[Nekawa Ma]

Thanks for all of the responses. My daughter is only a year old right now, so obviously we have some time before this will be a real issue for us. But it was something I'd been wondering about since it looks like we're going in for the long haul with the family bed. Sleepovers were a staple of my own childhood.

[mirthfulmum]

My almost 5 year old had his first sleep over at his "best-friend"'s house about a month ago, his first one. I was a bit nervous about it, A. hardly ever spends the entire night in his own bed. Usually he's curled up with one of us in our bed by 4 am.

A. was sleeping over at a family's home whom I trust completely, so my son and his friend both snuggled into the family bed with friend's mom and dad. A. had a blast, and felt totally safe the entire night. It will be a few years before I'd have A. sleep over at someone's home with whom I didn't share that level of trust.

[Momily]

My son had a friend sleep over when he was 3 -- but only because his friend's mother was at the birth center having his little sister! Both families did family bed, and I ended up with both little boys in bed with me.

By 5, when we started sleep overs with friends with less compelling reasons, DS was moving back and forth between his bed and mine. When he has a friend over he just stays in his room with them, or on the floor of the living room -- wherever they've camped out for the night.

[newmommy]

DS has sleepovers. Once per month, I babysit my niece and nephew (Ages 2 and 7) overnight so that my SIL can have a break.

But at the end of the night, DS still wants to sleep with me and DH. After they have played and he is sleepy, he just goes and get in the family bed..leaving niece and nephew fast asleep in the family room.

[mirlee]

My son went to his first sleepover that wasn't at grandma's a couple of weeks ago. He and his friend shared the double bed in the guest room of his friend's house. They had a great time.