Preparing a child who's very anxious about shots FOR shots? - Page 2

[melissel]

Originally Posted by mamatoady

I'm sure this won't help, but I actually remember getting my 5 yr booster shots and I remember the nurse telling me it felt like a frog bite. I just sat there thinking "what does a frog bite feel like?" "do frogs bite?" anyway, I sat on my moms lap and she gave the shots (I think I got 2) and it was over.

On a side note, are YOU obsessing more about your daughters reaction to going than she is of actually getting the shots? She might pick up on your anxiety and misplace her own. If mom thinks it's no big deal and it won't be that bad, she can pick that up too.

sarah

Thanks Sarah. No, it's definitely her, unfortunately. Sometimes we'll be driving in the car listening to music, and all of a sudden she'll burst out with, "Mom, I just don't WANT to get shots!!!!!" I've tried to take a relaxed approach to it, and told her how I was nervous when we got our flu shots (when DD2 was an infant and we were worried what DD1 might bring home from preschool), but the nurse told me to relax my arm and the shot was so easy, I didn't even know it was over, blah blah blah.

The fear stems from the flu shot SHE got that same season. She was totally relaxed about shots because she didn't remember what they were like. So she was on my lap, all set for her shot. The nurse had her look at the pinwheel wall and then gave her the shot. I think she felt a little betrayed, even though I tried to explain to her what would happen beforehand (without scaring her, of course!). Ever since then she's been afraid

[A Boy's Mama]

I don't have anything to add other than I totally feel for your daughter. I'll be thinking of you guys on shot day! I hope her experience turns out to be much, much less than what she obviously has it worked up to in her mind.

Your daughter really sounds amazing though, in that she's been anticipating these shots for almost 2 years! Wow, talk about tenacious! I can only imagine the fierce woman she'll grow into. Watch out world!

[Pastrydemon]

I specifically remember having to get a booster at 5. I was terrified (I mean completely terrified of needles.). My mom had my best friend come with us. Craig sat there and made faces at me to distract me during the shot. My mom still talks about this! It really helped to have my buddy (who was not freaked out by needles) there.

[Flower of Bliss]

What about pushing up the shot date to May or June? If she's panicking about it for months and months it is just making the fear worse and more draining. I say get it over with so she can stop worrying about it. Then you can have a less stressful summer and let her be excited about starting school instead of fearful of getting the shot.

[lovingmommyhood]

Originally Posted by Sage72380

What about pushing up the shot date to May or June? If she's panicking about it for months and months it is just making the fear worse and more draining. I say get it over with so she can stop worrying about it. Then you can have a less stressful summer and let her be excited about starting school instead of fearful of getting the shot.

ITA with this.

ETA: When I got my boosters at age 5 the nurse had me squeeze one of those red balls that you usually squeeze when they are drawing blood, in the opposite hand. That way I was totally focusing on my right arm when the shot was going in my left arm, which was pretty relaxed. Plus when you're nervous it gives you something to think about. "squeeze the ball, squeeze the ball"

[woo27ks]

My dd gets hers on Tuesday and we've been planning her day for awhile now. Her appt. is at 9:15 am- so we will go get coffee and a bagel before - then after the appt. she wants to go over to her best friend's house to play. She also thinks she should get to pick lunch and dinner.

[moondiapers]

EMLA cream. It has to be applied about an hour ahead of time, so ask your doc to have some ready for you to pick up the day before. It completely numbs the skin. Then make sure they do the least painful shots first. The DTaP is VERY painful, so save that one for last.

[myjulybabes]

You know, I'd try moving up the appointment too. The anticipating can be worse than the actual shot! I tell you this as first hand knowledge...with this pregnancy, I have to have a shot of anti-coagulants DAILY and I'm severely needle phobic. I have to just do it, or tell dh "just go!" or I'll sit there forever agonizing over it.

Have you explained to her why she's getting shots? My dd obsessed over hers too, but she got a little mantra going about "It's going to hurt, but only for a minute, and it'll keep me from getting really sick later!" (yes, I know that's debatable, but since this is a support topic, not a debate one, it may be appropriate)

Make sure the nurse/doctor lets the area they swab with alcohol dry before they inject. If it's still wet, boy does that add to the sting! (once again, personal experience!) Can you let her pick out band-aids that are her favorite color or have her favorite character on them? Anything that'll be a distraction will be handy-- a toy she can fidget with with the other hand, a favorite book, cool pictures to look at.

Ask if you can give Tylenol or Motrin beforehand. I know they used to recommend that when my kids were babies, not sure if that's still the recommendation.

[LynnS6]

Moving the date up is a good idea. You can go to the doctor's for just the shots (I know because we've done that) and NOT the full well child visit. So, if your insurance won't pay for the well child visit until July, you can still go in for a 'shots only' visit in June, and then do the WCC in July when she's scheduled.

[robugmum]

Use the EMLA cream for sure. I would also bring a bottle of bubbles and a wand. Have her blow bubbles in the Dr's office. Its one of those great activities which really captivates kids, helps them regulate their breathing and is naturally calming. You could tell her the Dr. needs help cleaning the air in his/her office or something. Good Luck!

[Mirzam]

Soothing the screams from child vaccines

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/18524214/

They actually did a study on it. :

[Cygnet09]

Thank you for that link!

We've delayed some vax, so haven't had to deal with this for awhile. Now they are coming due and I'm not sure how to deal with it, either. DD1 would never let me nurse her during shots - she would scream no matter what. DD2 did better, but it was still a struggle.

We've used lollipops after the shot as a reward for being brave, but I've always worried about them making an unhealthy connection between sweets and feeling better, kwim? Is this silly? I have read about sugar-dipped pacifiers (or nursing) helping for painful procedures, so why not let them suck on a lollipop when they are older? I've heard so many times about not using food as a reward or a bribe. Should that still be the case for a scary and potentially painful situation as well? Does anyone have any thoughts on this?

[polyhymnia]

I am still to this day (nearly 25) terrified of shots or blood draws. Kinda sucks cause I have/had hypothyroidism which requires a lot of blood draws. I am getting better about the blood draws but still have major issues with injections. Here are some thoughts from the other perspective

1) Yes, it hurts. Don't tell me "it won't hurt" or "it will only hurt for a second". DON'T lie to me. I don't care if it doesn't hurt you, it *does* hurt me, and I hate having people trivialise my feelings. Please do not be afraid to acknowledge to your daughter that it will likely hurt, but that you will be there for her before, during, after and you will do whatever you can to help. One thing that helps - it is impossible for me to really relax, which always makes injections hurt more - have her squeeze really tightly on a stressball or wad of paper towelling or something. Then just before the injection (you will need to coordinate in advance w/the doctor and your daughter) have her let go. This will release the tension in her muscle and "force" her to relax. It doesn't eliminate the injection pain but it helps prevent soreness afterward. Giving advil or tylenol beforehand can help with this too.

I never had a numbing spray but for me that wouldn't do anything, I hate that numb feeling you get from it!!

Another thing is that one time the doctor tried using a butterfly needle for an injection on the premise that it was smaller and therefore less painful. I appreciated the thought but unfortunately it just means that it takes longer to inject all of the stuff, so all in all I prefer a regular size needle.

2) Have something ready for after. I don't normally condone bribes but this is one instance when I think it's great. I always got four stickers (one for me and one for my brother, mom, and dad) after a shot from the doctor's office, they usually only gave out one. Then I would get to go to Wendy's and get a Frosty. This was a big deal for me as we *never* had fast food growing up I am sure you could come up with an equivalent "treat". It just gave me something else to focus on and start to calm down and let go of the trauma. If you could come up with something to have at the dr's office that would be good too.

3) Discuss with your daughter whether she wants to know in advance or not. Maybe in the future you can not tell her she will be having her appointment. You would have to arrange this with the DR apparently. For me I did better not knowing - I wouldn't sleep for days before the appointment. So instead, Mom would make the appt and not tell me until it was time to go. I had less time to freak out about it. At the same time she gradually worked with me to prepare in general so I could start to learn coping techniques.

If it does not improve and she continues to be afraid, please don't belittle her or make her feel ashamed. Needle fear is a well known phenomenon and very common. It helped me to realise how common it actually is to not feel so stupid. I had a nurse yell at me once (I was ~9) and tell me to stop acting like a baby. That did not help. There are some hypnosis programs out there that can help. I haven't gone that route yet. I just no longer have injections There's nothing I need injected into my body at this point so I skip that. I have not had an injection since I was 12 and kicked a nurse and walked out of a drs office when they tried to give me one. I do recognise that blood draws are important so I am working on that but like I said - my issues are twofold. The pain is one, the other is the thought of something being injected into my body. I have not been able to overcome that second part yet and I am not ready to try.

One thing that we did do to help me learn to cope with blood draws was to give me an anti-anxiety medication before my blood draw, a couple of times in a row. Just enough to help me relax and calm down and not get so worked up, enough to help me focus on my breathing and get through the experience a few times. Now that I have done that, and know what I need to do, and know what to expect, etc, it is easier for me to do it on my own. Don't know if that's something to consider or not but it helped me. I also have to lie down fully every time or I will pass out.

I don't know if any of this helps - I hope something is useful and that you are able to find the best way to be supportive and help your daughter through this. Your daughter will probably be able to tell you what she needs/wants from you at least on some level. Having a plan always helped me.

MTA: I HATE the "distraction" technique. I cannot watch, but I need to be told what is happening. I hate phlebotomists that just start swabbing and stabbing. TELL ME WHAT YOU ARE DOING :P I have a "spiel" I give before every blood draw and that's part of it but I think they zone out after the "I don't do well with this and I need to lie down" and don't listen to the "please tell me what you are doing as you are doing it" bit :-/

MTA Again: Another thing the doctors tried when I was 12 or so was to give me a little needle to take home with me. The idea being mom could show it to me, I could "play" with it and get familiar with it so I wouldn't be so scared by it. That didn't work. I felt nauseous and sometimes threw up just looking at the darn thing. Nice idea, but no go for me.

[NamastePlatypus]

I have been a needle phobe as LONG as I can remember. I needed five male nurses to hold me down at 5, I have a pathological fear of needles, she might as well. There was NEVER enough coaxing, bribing, gentle words, nothing, that would calm me down. I would not eat for weeks before if I knew about it. I knew it was not so much painful, pain does not bother me, it is what it is, cold metal going into my body and injecting stuff. I broke a needle in my arm one time trying to kick hit or bite one of the nurses. It is BAD ( my fear that is), I am just now okay kinda with a blood draw. Sorry not happy uplifting news for ya but I know how she feels and it sucks and is hard and scary.

Not flaming you for your choice!! It sounds like you had a hard time with it.

Abigail great post by the way!!!!