Where's a great place to raise a family--sell me on your town!

[fiatslug]

We are among the "renting poor" : in the San Francisco Bay Area. DH and I grew up here, family and friends are here, as is increasingly ghastly smog, traffic, and an absurdly high cost of living. I'm obligated by my job to be here until ~July 2008, but then, we want to get outta dodge. Leave California? Very possible, though the North Coast is appealing. We love the Sonoma coast, but even that's getting overrun (and housing costs are nearly as insane there as here). We're looking for some place with the potential to live rurally, though I need to be commuteably near at least a minor city to work (I am the provider, DH is the SAHD). We love Oregon and Washington (though we understand Seattle is only slightly less expensive/crowded than SF these days). And we LOVE LOVE LOVE Vermont/New Hampshire!

So we have some ideas, but I want to open up the search. My local radio station's morning show had some DJs talking with ex-pat Bay Area-ites in towns like Ithaca (cheap housing, gorge-eous , farmer's markets, progressive politics--all for us!) and Iowa City (all the benefits of a major university town with small town appeal), and I thought, hey, we could live there. I hear the Carolinas are wonderful.

Don't want to start any political flame wars but we're pretty crunchy--I'm guessing we wouldn't feel at home in, say, Houston (and we have to rule that out anyway, b/c we can't take the heat! The heat here is killing us--got up to 117 last July!). I don't want to be the only non-vaxin', organic eatin', breast feedin', co-sleepin', cloth diaperin' mama on the block .

Suggestions, mamas? TIA!

[dubfam]

Portland is really great. I am born and raised here, and I love it. I know a lot of people who have moved here from San Fran and LOVE It. I have heard that our current cost of living is really similar, with the HUGE exception of housing costs (Portland is cheaper).

We have been rated the most sustainable city in the US, as well as one of the best cities to raise children in. We have fantastic public transportation and a lot of choices when it comes to schools (although some people seem to be unhappy with the public schools here).

I am sure you have been here before, but it has really been changing a lot over the last 6 years. The dining is amazing, and there is a TON of fabulous places to shop. We have all the big stores like Anthropologie and American Apparel, Luis Vuitton and Sax 5th as well as a rapidly growing number of small local boutiques and designers/clothing reconstructers. There are tons of resale and thrift shops.

There is a huge focus here on Organic, local Foods and we have lots of really good health food stores like Whole Foods and New Seasons. We also have many different farmer's markets all over town.

There are lots of young people who live here and TONS of families. I know so many Fabulous mamas here!! The community is great. We have Knitting cafes and Powells Books and Stumptown Coffee! And everything is close together and easy to get to.

And you would only be a 12 hour drive or 90 minute flight from home!! You would be only 3 hours from Seattle and 8 hours from the Humboldt County, CA
So you would be kind of in the middle of all the places that you mentioned.

I love it here so much!!!!!!

[Snowdrift]

MI is highly underappreciated it seems. There is a close and thriving (and not small) crunchy community here in Lansing. Ditto Ann Arbor, Kalamazoo, Traverse City and some parts of metro Detroit. Warm summers, cold winters, but not inhumanly so in either case. Gorgeous state. Lovely. Wonderful. I hope I never live outside of MI.

[midwestmeg]

Minneapolis, Minnesota for your politics! And I'm guessing from your post (and current location) that you have an affinity for yuppie/hippie/groovy stuff- we've got lots of that in the cities!

PLUS Minneapolis is a great place to buy a house right now; there was so much 'growth and boom' here in the last 5 years and now the housing market has really cooled off. There are lots of great opportunities to purchase.

Can you tell I'd love to live in Minneapolis?!! We're about an hour west of the cities, St. Cloud area, which is nice, but not super fun like the cities.

You might try this thread in 'finding your tribe' also. Good luck!

[Mirzam]

Boulder, CO, but it isn't cheap, but cheaper than the Bay Area. You certainly won't be the only non-vaxing, organic eating, breastfeed, co-sleeping, slinging, cding mama on the block! We have great health food stores, a wonderful farmers market, many educational choices, good public schools and plenty of private schools, including Waldorf, Montesssori, comtemplative, democratic, Reggio, etc. Lots of great hiking and biking trails, skiing close by, awesome scenery and the weather is pretty good too -- plenty of sunshine, not too much rain, unlike the Pacific North West and much better winters than the North East.

[lalaland42]

Mothering has an article (that I just sent to DH) about the top 25 cities for families. Here is a link.

I lived in Seattle almost my whole life and it is just too expensive. To live in the city especially. After another discussion on the same topic, I have been eyeing Brattleboro, Vermont, which is on the Mothering list. A good friend of mine moved from Seattle to Portland and although both of us like this city, his commute was horrible from the suburbs he could afford. If you could find a house in the city, Portland would be nice.

I lived in Eugene, OR and I think that is a definite possibility. It is smaller then Portland and definitely crunchy. It is pretty affordable too. The weather is also a little better then Seattle.

Currently I am in Dallas (which sucks, don't come here) and about 4 hours south is Austin. I love Austin, lots of people love Austin. Compared to Seattle and Portland it is much more affordable. The summers are still hot, hot, hot. Definitely crunchy, did you know the original Whole Foods is from Austin?

If you want something really rural and really affordable, I would go to western Montana. Missoula is fairly crunchy and the public transit around Missoula is pretty good although it stops running early. Everything in Missoula closes early though, except for bars. There are some food coops, a lot of outdoor activities and the people are very nice. I lived in Missoula for 4 years and loved it. I also lived in Boulder and I thought Missoula was a smaller, cheaper version of Boulder. -And the ski areas are closer!!!

[frog]

We're in Ypsilanti, MI. It's adjacent to Ann Arbor--we like it much more because it's more working folk, fewer tenured folk. That works for us. The taxes are atrocious but the homes are much more affordable than A2.

[dancingmama]

Another Michigander, here! I'm in Ann Arbor and I loooooooove it. If you want to live rural, it's minutes away. I love the 4 seasons, and Michigan is such a beautiful state. Literally surrounded by lakes. We drove 2.5 hours this past weekend and spent 3 days on Lake Michigan with some of the most gorgeous shore-lines and sand dunes.... minus the crowds, of which there were NONE. Ann Arbor itself is a University town, and has all the wonderful cultural things that go along with that. There is so much to do. But the size is reasonable, and nothing is more than a 10 minute drive, really. Traffic within the city is not an issue. And plenty of crunch here. Lots. Great homebirth midwives, farmer's market twice a week, food co-op and other healthy store choices, lots of summer festivals and music and such. And good sledding hills in the winter. I'm quite happy here.

Must add.... housing is not at all cheap, but compared to SF, it probably looks like we're giving it away. Right now is a TOTAL buyer's market here, with houses cheaper than they've been in a decade.

[Legato_bluesummers]

Darn.......I would try to sell you to my city....but it makes me cry reading the other posters. *sigh* I am now thinking "why am I here". I think we are the ONLY ones who think what we think in about a 100 mile radius. But if you like a town where everybody is in everybody's business, you can't take a poop without somebody calling you 5 minutes later asking "did it all come out ok", or the town with the most rumors where, without you even knowing ofcourse, you have done multiple things like cheating and stealing. *sigh* Once again why am I here..........

[elmh23]

I was going to suggest Albuquerque, NM to you until you mentioned heat. Everything else fits but it does get pretty hot here in the summer.

[punchy]

Ashville, NC
Ithica, NY
Burlington, VT

[Minaret]

I will "third" the nomination for Ann Arbor, Michigan. That's where I'm from, and to this day, I love that town more than any other town I've been to.
The influence from the university makes the town so culturally unique and interesting.

When I was a kid, I used to go to "Borders" books, which was in Ann Arbor.
It was the only bookstore at the time that had three floors! When I was in college, I applied for a job there---and each applicant had to take a test to see how knowledgeable they were about various famous authors. It was a hard test! Only then could one get an interview to work there---now its a chain of course!

Ann Arbor is the perfect size and I have so much fun when I go back there.
There is a really great arts festival for four days in July that brings 500,000 people to town. I have great memories of that. The only reason I moved away was it was cold cold cold in the winter. My parents still live in the area and I live in Idaho, which sucks. I didn't realize it was just as cold in the winter here, if not colder than Michigan.
Where I live now is a beautiful, expensive area (near Ketchum) but we can't afford to buy anything. The schools are great but this is the only area besides (Moscow and McCall) that I would call crunchy. Twin Falls is awful, and many of the other Idaho towns are stuck back in the 60's (as far as the way they look) and very conservative. Ann Arbor is definitely a liberal town. However, the surrounding areas are very mixed, mostly conservative. I still think about moving back there, but I also can't cope without the mountains and I don't like humidity anymore.

[Minaret]

Oh I guess I forgot about Boise.....it's growing rapidly and getting very progressive. Good weather, beautiful mountains, the university....I would say its mixed as far as the crunchy part goes...

[Starr]

Where I live certainly isn't ideal or doable for everyone but it is nice. Its a very very small town, think 500 people, everyone knows everyone. DH and I both grew up in town and I'm still referred to as so and so's daughter, remember her grandma was.... well everyone seems to know our entire life story sometimes.

But it is nice. In my entire life I have never locked the door to our house, wether it was living with my parents or my house now with DH. Never locked my car either, and nothing has been stolen. You have one cop in town and we know him quite well on a first name basis. Last night Olivia was outside tyrying to chase after the older kids on the block who were all playing tag. Its the kind of town where when DH is home outside with Olivia and he got an ambulance car, our neighbors across the street knew he had to go and said don't worry we'll watch her until your back. Yes we know them but its pretty common for our neighbors to volunteer or watch her while we mow the lawn or run errands. In the summer there is a farmers market and no matter how many times I go to buy a dozen sweet corn I know when I get home there will be at least two dozen if not more because DH used to work for the farmer when he was in high school. The biggest problem our teenagers seem to have is throwing parties and getting minors as opposed to all the bad stuff out there. Again its not for everyone and it seems to be especially harder for people out of the area to move in but its great place for Olivia to grow up.

[AlexisT]

Burlington's great. My cousin went to college there (UVM) and I used to go visit her. Gorgeous scenery, definitely a hippie-ish feeling although I don't know how the parenting scene is. About 90mins drive to Montreal which is great for shopping and going out to eat. It is cold in the winter but the seasons are so beautiful there.

I won't try to sell you on where I'm from Actually one of the areas near where I lived, Huntington, is known for being one of LI's more progressive areas. Gay pride parade through the village every year. But it's not much cheaper there than the Bay Area, and Long Island just gets more and more built up--I'm moving back but I still find that aspect depressing.

[BookGoddess]

I like where I am. We have two locally run health food stores within 10 minutes of my home. A Whole Foods store is scheduled to open in town in January. Every week we have two farmers markets in the neighborhood and several others within driving distance. There are so many diverse ethnic restaurants in the area. You can eat Korean, Japanese, Chinese, Thai, Indian, Vietnamese, Italian, Argentinian, Mexican food. The population is very diverse. No one group is the majority. There are many many interracial and interethnic marriages and no one bats an eyelash. The public and private schools in the are are good. We live within 10 minutes of one of the best beaches in the USA. All beaches are open to the public and free. The scenery here is gorgeous. It is Hawaii after all. You can hike, bike ride, paddle/canoe, jog, walk, garden, swim, surf, windsurf throughout the year. It is warm (I won't lie about it) but the weather isn't as hot as certain southwestern US states and on the upside you don't have to deal with snowy roads, sleet, ice, or a heating bill. People are friendly. The pace of life is much slower than the rest of the USA. People are family-oriented and it's quite common for grandpas, grandmas, aunties, and uncles to live in one big house or very close by. Breastfeeding rates here are higher than the rest of the US. Babywearing isn't as popular but catching on.

Where do I live? I live on the eastern side (windward) side of the island of Oahu in Hawaii. I like it here and I would sell you on it BUT the cost of living is as high as San Francisco.

[spedteacher30]

If you are thinking Ithaca, I would suggest Charlottesville, Virginia. Some say it is the Ithaca of the South, but of course, we prefer to think of Ithaca as the Yankees' Charlottesville...

Seriously, depending on the field you are in, Charlottesville might suit you very nicely.

[mama40]

lalaland, Brattleboro is s-m-a-l-l. I do mean small. And the VT austerity is no joke. If you go, go with a plan to be self-sufficient. But go stay for a week first and see how you feel about walking up and down the same street all the time.

I live in a crunchy smallish university town, and while I've been here 15 years and love this place, for me it's been a lot more fun as a single childless woman than it is as a parent. Your life turns inward, to an extent, you look for other well-rooted people, and then the smallness of the town really starts to come home. The cultural life is better than what you'll find in most non-metro areas, but it's still not major-metro quality. Diversity is often lacking. If you're any kind of minority, your community will be wicked tiny. While it's safe here, and inexpensive, and the public schools are great, I'm a city girl, and I'm really feeling the fact that I'm not bringing dd up in the wide world. It could also be that I've really aged out of the great wash of students coming in and out, so I'm really here with The People Who Really Live Here.

It's also a little meh when it comes to going out. OK to spend $15 on a middling show when it's just you running out the door, but to arrange babysitting, and pay, and schlep around like it's a really special affair, just to end up at a third-rate performance...you know, to me it's not worth it.

I think I may be ready to move on. That or start traveling again.

[sunanthem]

Asheville is a great town to raise kids in. Its fun and affordable.

[jennifer0246]

Check out western Massachusetts as well, particularly the Amherst/Northampton area -- it's a liberal mecca, really fairly crunchy, educated, and affordable.