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"most homeschooled kids are kinda weird" - Page 2

post #21 of 70
Actually it was going on a hike with some homeschool kids and noticing how weird they are that cemented my decision to homeschool.

The bigger kids took an interest in the little ones. One big kid bent down and gave my child a prolonged explanation about hospital helicopters when she pointed to one in the sky. For once nobody questioned or seemed overly concerned about what gender my short haired girl is. And mine was the only kid in a TV character shirt. :

I really want that kind of freedom for my child.
post #22 of 70
Well, me - I think SCHOOLED kids are weird, in a cookie cutter typed way.
post #23 of 70
I was a weird PS kid. I loved to read, was shy, and lived in my own world much of the time. I was not into being like everyone else 100% of the time (but I was not a nonconformist, either). I was not a troublemaker, and I cared what adults thought of me. At home I lived a quiet life, had few outside activities, but was very happy playing with my sister and a few friends and neighbors. my parents played board games with us. We read books and listened to classical music.


I have one PS kid and 3 HSed kids. My PSer wanted more friends. He thought he'd do well in school. He's been in for 2 years and it has been brutal (7 and 8th grade). He is becoming less and less his own person. When he is his own person, he is misunderstood for it, ridiculed, etc. He does not make good grades, and feels that learning is basically a "crock." He used to love to read, but is too tired to do so much of the time now. He gets made fun of for it, anyway, often by the "gifted" kids who say reading is for "losers."

He has not attracted many of the "good" kids, but he is very accepting of all kinds of people, so he attracts a wide variety of kids. A few adults really "get" him, which is good, but some just shake their heads in a puzzled way, as to why he can't do better and act better (less silly and spacey--he might have ADD).

My second oldest is an outgoing girl with good manners and athletic ability. She's a dancer, has several homeschooled dance friends, some church friends of all schooling backgrounds (PS, private school, and HS), and is content to be herself. She is disgusted with the few girls she knows who went to PS for middle school and "sold out" to the world of popularity, cheerleading, etc. Of all my kids, she'd probably be most well-liked, but there'd probably be kids who wouldn't "get" her.

My younger ds is 8 and is quiet when need be, active, loud at home, sensitive, and easygoing. He is good at entertaining himself. he never gets into trouble with adults and most kids like him. He does o ccasionally get made fun of for having speech issues. No one has made fun of his problems with reading, but I think he would hate school because of it.

My youngest dd is almost 4 and is wild, loud, silly, and seems to be highly intelligent. She is a lot like my oldest ds. She gets mad at other kids trying to push her around, getting in her face, etc. I am not sure of her "weirness quotient" at this time.

My dh is even weird. He was the kid in school who could have done better, but by high school, his problems at home and school caused him to give up. He got into lots of bad stuff, but wasn't a bad person at heart. He was looking for a nice girl, a clean life, etc. We had more in common than I would have thought from first impressions.

I guess, overall, we are all weird to some extent. We just don't always see other's weirdness. My family as a whole tends to not be attracted to the "sheep" and the "lemmings."
post #24 of 70
Rhetorically: what in the "real world" is being forced into an age-based cohort, answering to regimented objectives set by someone else using a one-size-fits-all protocol good for?

And if it's a peon job in a large corporation or government, then perhaps our kids should aim higher.

I get frustrated by the belief that something in the conventional schooling environment, which is a highly artificial atmosphere, defines the ideal for socializing and interaction.

That's like when we were assigned roommates in college, and some people tried to argue that being set up in a cubicle with a twin bed next to a stranger would somehow prepare us for marriage.
post #25 of 70
Yeah I do think homeschoolers can be weird. They tend to have unconventional parents or the kids themselves weren't good candidates for fitting in at school (for whatever reason - social, medical, academic, psychologocial, philosophical). They tend to have less experience being asked to conform to a certain set of norms (ie expectations for classroom behaviour of sit still, don't speak until spoken to, adults are authority figures etc).
You could pick my homeschooled kids out of a crowd - probably for lots of reasons. They act out their vivid imaginations without hesitation, they are affectionate with their siblings and friends - regardless of age or gender, they have their own invented language and an odd set of interests compared to their agemates.
And I like it that way :nana:

As for the real world comment - most of the PPs have answered that. My kids are secluded. They are in the real world. They deal with a wide variety of people in different circumstances. And they have me to help guide them through the rough spots so they learn appropriate skills to manage effectively on their own as they get older.
post #26 of 70
Like others on this board have said, I'm weird (or unique ), too, and I went to public schools.
I actually want my kids to be weird. I want them to be able to go their own way, think for themselves. And hopefully, by homeschooling them, they will be able to do so without feeling the guilt that I sometimes to for not conforming.

Maybe they will be able to consider themselves unique instead of weird.
post #27 of 70
I went to an unschooling convention type thing and I was shocked at how weird the kids were. I came home in a panic and talked with my SO and a friend about it. My thoughts were, "what if my totally cool kid turns in to a weird kid?" I know, I'm silly. What makes him cool? He can hang with the best of those other commercialized kids, knows all of his pop culture and can recite most spongebob lines to perfection.

My S/O and friend surprised me. The said "It sounds like those kids were just not too afraid of being themselves." I thought about it and it was true. The kids that I saw being weird were having a really good time with each other. They weren't standing in a corner, trying to be cool. They would be the kinds of kids who would actually be the first to get on the dancefloor, ya know? They were accepting of each other too.

So, if my son becomes weird, I'm ok with it. I'd much rather he be himself and weird than conform to what he thinks is cool according to his school peers. I'd rather that he like something, or be some way because it's what he truly feels, rather than "everyone else likes it or acts this way, so it must be right."

Good topic.
Lisa
post #28 of 70
Well, I claim the official "Weird" award. So of course my kids will be weird. I take pride in weird. Weird means not the norm and I don't agree with or follow most all the "norm rules."

Frankly, I think that many homeschool kids get more experience with diversity and differences. They are usually around multi-age groups and do an array of different activities in different places. At least this is our homeschool experience.
post #29 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by oceanbaby View Post
I told dh once that I don't think hs makes a kid weird, I think it lets them be weird.

I love it! Can I steal your quote???????
post #30 of 70

Weirdos Unite!

Just remember, all of the people who've changed our world were "weird". Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, Sir Isaac Newton, plus so many more that I can't think of now - all "weird", not the popular kids by any stretch of the imagination. My DH was weird (pschooled), I was weird (private school), Bill Gates was weird. School is generally something that people have to survive and overcome to get to real life. Even if you were a cool kid- in fact, the popular kids have it the worst sometimes, because that ends up being the highlight of their lives. I opted out of the whole thing for mine - I'd rather them be who they are and be strong in themselves 1st, so they can see the world with a clear sense of their own worth and evaluate it with a powerful ability to think for themselves. Internal strength first.
post #31 of 70
Hmmm, I think I'll take weird over being a generic lemming.
post #32 of 70
You know, I can kinda see where people say this. :

I do know lots of really cool (nothing wrong with weird!) hs kids and adults but I have also known some which I don't consider so much weird as creepy.

And unfortunately these are the hs kids who everyone thinks about. Like in my German class last year, there was a 17yo hs kid in it. His family also housed the foreign students for the cc that we were at.

From the 2 students who lived at his house, I know exactly why we were all freaked out by this kid. Firstly, he was...annoying and pompous. Not to mention extremely socially akward. His family were hardcore right Conservative Ezzo worshipers. Their oldest kids (19-14) still had to hold their parents hands when they left the house and call every half hour even when at school (he took a couple of cc classes).

So of course noone ever thinks about all the comparatively normal hs kids out there because they really do blend in and are not as abnormal as this guy.

Not that abnormal is wrong...but I can see why some people would look at kids like this and say that.
post #33 of 70
ITA with whoever said homeschooling lets them be weird.
Ds is only 5, so he hasn't been hs'd long enough for it to "turn" him weird, but he's "weird" nonetheless. He has long hair and everyone thinks he's a girl. He doesn't care. His cousin, in ps, asked to get his long hair cut after about three people thought he was girl. Ds is in jujitsu - there are some games they do there that he doesn't want to do, so he doesn't (I'm thankful the teachers don't force him). I don't think it would ever occur to any of the other kids (all ps'd) to respectfully decline to participate. It also seems that his jujitsu teachers (one is a ps teacher, too) find him a breath of fresh air, because he is his own person. I know that if he were to go to ps, he would lose that part of himself (or be picked on because of it). I'm thankful that we get to hs him, so he can remain true to himself. If that's weird, I'll take it.
post #34 of 70
So the stereotype comes from somewhere.....but I think NOW that the stereotype is the EXCEPTION rather than the rule.
There are just soooo many more kids that homeschool for such a huge variety of reasons that there is no "one type" of homeschool kid.

Have you been to a homeschool group lately? Really, you should visit one and see for yourself. At our homeschool group we have toddlers to high schoolers and we have a variety of religions, ethnicities, abilities, socio-economic groups, etc.
We have kids that are into sports and some that are into chess, we have kids that are full of energy and some that are shy.

Gee-sounds just like the variety of kids at any school huh?

It boils down to the fact that homeschooling is different than the norm so people ASSume that people that do that must be different and that's just not OK with many. Thus homeschool kids are "weird" or different because of societal fears and ignorance.
post #35 of 70
"Normal" people do not change the world. They don't take chances, they don't stand out. The "average" person is almost completly invisible.

I want nothing less than absolute weirdom for my children, they deserve much better than to simply be "normal".
post #36 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by eloquence View Post
and weird is a problem because.....
:
post #37 of 70
My homeschooled kids of freaky wierd ps'd parents are well, freaky wierd. You don't turn out normal when you grow up wearing Starfleet uniforms and playing RPGs no matter where you go to school.
post #38 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by thismama View Post
Actually it was going on a hike with some homeschool kids and noticing how weird they are that cemented my decision to homeschool.

The bigger kids took an interest in the little ones. One big kid bent down and gave my child a prolonged explanation about hospital helicopters when she pointed to one in the sky. For once nobody questioned or seemed overly concerned about what gender my short haired girl is. And mine was the only kid in a TV character shirt. :

I really want that kind of freedom for my child.

Yes, that is something I noticed as well whenever I was around hs kids. I always saw kids whoe were comfortable with themselves, very polite, caring, willing to help, and didn't try to act "cool." I want that for my kids.



Quote:
Originally Posted by ShaggyDaddy View Post
"Normal" people do not change the world. They don't take chances, they don't stand out. The "average" person is almost completly invisible.

I want nothing less than absolute weirdom for my children, they deserve much better than to simply be "normal".
Exactly.
post #39 of 70
My kid is a little weird and I am proud of it! He's not weird really - he's original!
post #40 of 70
Dd is proud that she's not a "carbon copy child" (her term for kids who follow whatever the current fad is.)

Ds1 owns the title "Weird." He's very pleased to be weird (or unique.) When he wore his favorite outfit recently to a large gathering, an acquaintence saw him in the crowd and commented (with a positive tone) "You've gotta be some kind of confident to wear that!"

"Different" "weird" "unique" whatever you want to call it--that's my kid!
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