or Connect
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Mom › Talk Amongst Ourselves › Personal Growth › Life After Waldorf ~ A Support Group
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Life After Waldorf ~ A Support Group - Page 47

post #921 of 1181
Hi Muse,
Sorry to hear there was no room in the Montessori school! Could you get on their waiting list anyway?
Many of us have been pleasantly surprised with public schools. I know some can be awful but there are some excellent ones out there. I know it takes sometime to get used to the idea. When we were still at Waldorf I used to cringe at the idea of sending a child to public school. I have horrible memories of public school as a child but times have changed. Many public schools are very up to date with all the new research on learning styles and many of the teachers have very good training. Look at what Beansavi is doing in her public school classroom!
About the top music therapist who is also a life long anthroposophist.... wow he described Waldorf as pernicious? That is creepy! I take it he is no longer an anthroposophist?

Quote:
Originally Posted by muse View Post
sad news, no spots in the m school.....huge bummer....now we're not sure what to do. haven't found a good affordable alternative.

ETA
also wanted to say, i was just away for 5 daysat a music therapy conference. i talked with a top music therapist who is also a life long anthroposophist about his opinion about music in waldorf schools and he basically told me to get out of there asap. he had much to say but basically said these schools are full of dogma and can be so damaging. he knows first hand from yrs and yrs (he's in his 70's) of experience in the UK and US. In fact, "pernicious" was the word he used. I had to look that word up:

pernicious:
1. highly injurious or destructive : deadly
2. archaic : wicked

And I came home to ds telling me how much trouble he got into at school all week. : (
post #922 of 1181
Momabeehilly,
I agree with Orangewallflower that you should go to the Waldorf Sub-forum in the Education forum to get more information on what is good about Waldorf.
In this thread we have all had traumatic experiences so it is hard to see any good.
Of course there is good, but you should still take the time and read the all the posts about the bad things that have happened to some of us.
I wish I had read about all the bad stuff before we put our son in Waldorf.

I will try and answer some of your questions:

"what is good about waldorf? "
For us, the natural materials, the sense of community and being with more likeminded parents.

"what is bad?" Read all the bad experiences and similar experiences that happen all over the world and know that they are all true.

"What resource have you found that has educated you most on this subject?"
Our own experiences talking to other parents. The Waldorf site will tell you something else

"i am hoping to tour the local waldorf school....what should i be attuned to and/or look for during my visit?"
Honest direct answers

"what would you do if you had it all to do again? "
If I could do it all over again I would not have put our son in Waldorf at all!



Quote:
Originally Posted by mommabeehilly View Post
hi, i have a dd who is 19 mos. old. as we have looked into schooling options, we are theoretically attracted to waldorf (nature, natural toys, play, tv free, etc). i came across this thread in all of my research, which i am pleased about as i like to see all sides before figuring out what is best for our family. i guess i am a researcher in that way. i have waded through many of the posts and don't want to spend the time reading them all. i would however like for folks to comment on the following questions i have (of course these are all subjective, but that's what i want).

what is good about waldorf?

what is bad?

what resource have you found that has educated you most on this subject?

i am hoping to tour the local waldorf school....what should i be attuned to and/or look for during my visit?

what would you do if you had it all to do again?

thanks! peace to you all. know that your answers will help me move forward to make the best decisions for our family.

kindly,
mommabeehilly
post #923 of 1181
Thread Starter 
OMG! *pant pant*

:

I just got a (mistaken) pm saying someone loved this thread but it is now closed.

WHEW!

They were looking at the old one.

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!

post #924 of 1181
Thread Starter 
I am going to catch up this weekend, but I want you to know:

I love you guys, and when I say I am truly THANKFUL for you all and for this thread, and for all you do to support each other...

we totally ROCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Happy Thanksgiving my friends

:

I have so much exciting stuff to share about my teaching job!

I will take some serious time over the holiday for this thread.

Many hugs,

Beth/Beansavi
post #925 of 1181
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by jalilah View Post
Momabeehilly,
I agree with Orangewallflower that you should go to the Waldorf Sub-forum in the Education forum to get more information on what is good about Waldorf.
In this thread we have all had traumatic experiences so it is hard to see any good.
Amen. Can't add to that... perfect!
post #926 of 1181
HI everyone! Just popping in to wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving! :
post #927 of 1181
Thread Starter 
You, too, Ravie!
post #928 of 1181
Thread Starter 
Okie dokie, while the turkey cooks and my coffee buzz begins to take effect...

Some of what I was delighted to discover this month at my new teaching job in a public school:

Our math textbooks are published by a well known publisher (not going to say the name in case it would allow some to track where I may teach-paranoid! ).

Anyhoo, the exercises in the book call for (in our multiplication and division lessons) using colored beads, stones, acorns, etc. as arrays (arrays are groups of objects children use to display, for example, 3 groups of 2 ---aka 3X2=6 --- or when learning to divide a group into these types of groups).

"Arrays" allow the children to see the relationship between all the math processes instead of viewing them as individual, abstract operations.

As I dug through my supplemental materials that accompany my teacher-text for math (yes, I am only now having the chance to go through all of the abundant materials I have in my room that were provided by the county school system---), I came across some worksheets that get the children to use arrays while seeing them on the paper in picture format.

They eventually circle groups within groups, and also are asked to color the multiplication table, looking for patterns within each times table. For example, when you color only the 6 times table or the 3 times table, you end up with very distinct plaid patterns.

I was always led to believe that, when I was taught to use acorns as arrays in my old waldorf school or to color patterns during math, that this was an idea unique to waldorf. I am again given the larger perspective: I can see now that waldorf is so ego-centric that they are ignorant of what else is going on in the mainstream American school system.

They fail to adequately describe the manner in which they are different than public schools. Their descriptions appear inaccurate to me because waldorf portrays mainstream education from their own very limited view.

They are not properly educated about what goes on in mainstream education, and therefore do THEMSELVES AN INJUSTICE when they go to compare themselves to other educational pedagogy.

This is only the beginning of the unit on multiplication and division.

And this is public school.

Mainstream.

Yay.

Happy Thanksgiving, all.

Beth
post #929 of 1181
Question: when you are filled with rage and shock at how you and your child have been treated by a school, what recourse can you take? Is there a healthy and useful way to communicate this to the school? We have no hope of anything changing for the better at this point but are reluctant to leave without speaking up; to teachers, admin and parents.
post #930 of 1181
Quote:
Originally Posted by muse View Post
Question: when you are filled with rage and shock at how you and your child have been treated by a school, what recourse can you take? Is there a healthy and useful way to communicate this to the school? We have no hope of anything changing for the better at this point but are reluctant to leave without speaking up; to teachers, admin and parents.
I think that the answer to this is really complicated. Personally, I think the short answer is no, there is nothing that you can say that will impact anything at a waldorf school. The belief system and actions are institutionally entrenched. I watched for years as parents with valid concerns were marginalized and given lip service at best. Or, as so often happens you hear a sort of folksy shock "Gee, never saw that before". "Funny, we never have heard those concerns before". There never seemed to be a lot of space for conversation because 1. no one is ever wrong, 2. accomodations aren't easily made, and 3. it's really hard to address the bizarre anthro stuff.

Does this mean you shouldn't speak up? Not at all. It's just that my jaded view is saying that it's better to be realiastic about addressing a system that closes ranks pretty quickly. When you deal with a system that has little to no mechanism for thoughtful self study, reflection and integration of constuctive criticism, you are hard pressed to make a dent. It's not your problem-it's their's as a body.

Peace will come with time. Just remember to claim what's yours as a family. Rhthym, celebration, arts, the natural world-for our family this was our way of life long before, and after, waldorf. PM if you need a friendly shoulder!
post #931 of 1181
Hi Muse,
When we left our WS, we were 1 of 30 families. I know, I and others have/had tried following the grievance procedure that was put in place to make the parents feel heard. Unfortunately we (my husband and I) found it more humiliating than helpful. It was just like pouring more salt onto open wounds.
Supposedly there is a better system to hear the parents concerns. I'm not sure if this works. It all depends upon who you ask.
It never hurts to tell others that you have truly been hurt. I did right a letter to the school after we left to tell them how disappointed we are in the whole system, etc... It does help start the healing.
Hi Bean,
Wow it sounds amazing the things you are teaching.
I was thinking since my youngest will be going to start kindergarden next year, that the test that Waldorf claims are "theirs" and "theirs" alone really aren't. My dh has had indepth discussion with the school psychologist? (I think that's who gives the test) and she was telling him what they look for. Many of the things were tests our WS had claimed to be theirs. Funny how things look from a different point of view. What they look for and how they can tell with certain tests if the child will have problems etc...
post #932 of 1181
Hi Ravie! We had a similar kindy experience, and actually in the past year I have seen how much of what we thought was only waldorf, and were told we'd never find anywhere else, is actually pretty standard teaching. I guess bean really speaks to this with her experience in both types of classrooms. The disturbing thing i have found though, is that there are some things that do actually need to be taught early on as buliding blocks, so to speak, that aren't adeqautely addressed in waldorf. It's sort of assumed that kids will naturally pick up in a fantastical sort of way, information or skills, when in fact some things need to be TAUGHT. It's not always a case of when a kid is developmentally ready they will "learn" it, or the skill will be available to them. Again and again I struggle to understand how we could have believed some of this stuff as educated adults.
post #933 of 1181
Quote:
Originally Posted by muse View Post
Question: when you are filled with rage and shock at how you and your child have been treated by a school, what recourse can you take? Is there a healthy and useful way to communicate this to the school? We have no hope of anything changing for the better at this point but are reluctant to leave without speaking up; to teachers, admin and parents.
Only you know what might make you feel better, but in my experience at more than one Waldorf school, you are better off conserving your energy and focusing on your new concerns. What you say will either be brushed off, as described, or you'll be told that they're shocked and concerned, etc etc, and then every detail of what you said will meander along the grapevine (gossip at Waldorf schools is insidious. I've never seen anything like it!).

Those who are unwise enough to need admonition are seldom wise enough to profit from it.

Or you can write to the local paper!
post #934 of 1181
Quote:
Originally Posted by LizD View Post
gossip at Waldorf schools is insidious. I've never seen anything like it!
so true. it has such an undermining effect on any sense of community building; totally splits the parents.
post #935 of 1181
I love the local paper idea! I totally agree with Liz about communicating within the Waldorf community. But an open letter to a paper might be really interesting and would be impossible to simply ignore or brush off.
post #936 of 1181
Quote:
Originally Posted by orangewallflower View Post
I love the local paper idea! I totally agree with Liz about communicating within the Waldorf community. But an open letter to a paper might be really interesting and would be impossible to simply ignore or brush off.
true, especially if it were signed by the two parents likely leaving the school; a child therapist and a psychologist!
post #937 of 1181
Thread Starter 
Hi, Y'all! I am officially on vay cay and so have half a brain cell left over with which to chat!

I am so NOT caught up here.... but you all know I love ya'.

I am going to PM a couple of you with a question...

In the mean time... hope you are having a festive and joyful holiday season.

:

I am doing really well. Most of you know I am going through a divorce after 15 years of marriage and three kids...homebirth... family.... but it is for the best and I am in a place I have not been in for a lONG time... a really GREAT place.

TTYS

Bean
post #938 of 1181
Thread Starter 
Happy New year, y'all!

Was just talking to Ravie about how we finally feel our waldorf sadness and shame feels like another lifetime. That's a good thing and something I thought, at times, would never come...
post #939 of 1181
Hi Bean! Just PM'd you yesterday, hoping to connect, and here you are! Hi Ravie!

Ok- I want in on that conversation, because I feel the same way. Just this week some friends re-visited some of the more hurtful stuff that went on in the grades, which by the way, is still going on, and I thought "We're just so far away from that now". I look at DD-happy as can possibly be, well bonded to her new school, friends, learning to beat the band. It's wonderful. Ds is most likely gifted so sorting out how to academically challenge him is a work in progress, but the point is, we're working on it together. No judgements because he is totally interested in cruising on ahead. God, we feel so darn healthy I can hardly stand it.

I want to hear from you ladies about how you all are doing-you're always in my heart:.
post #940 of 1181
Hi Karne,
It sounds like your family is doing great! I love to hear that there is life after W and that healing is possible. Also there are no regrets!
I do not regret pulling my dd or that my youngest will never have to go through what my oldest did. But I feel that my youngest would have been a hell raiser for them. I mean that in the best way possible. She's very strong and has a good sense of what's going on.
The bumps seem minor now compared to what we've been through. Even socially (which was the biggest problem for my dd) she's figuring out things for herself. She's realizing there is a huge world out there and that there are nice people. She likes to sit back and watch people interact and make decisions based on what she sees! It's good she can be the observer and figure things out at her own pace!
Thinking about you all too!:
Ravie
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Personal Growth
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Mom › Talk Amongst Ourselves › Personal Growth › Life After Waldorf ~ A Support Group