Originally Posted by heartmama
Actually, I agree with this sentiment. We did use carseats, but some of the rhetoric from hardliners strikes me as incredibly narrow. If they really look at all the things they do in a day which are far more likely to hurt a child than riding in a car improperly restrained, I don't think they could justify the degree of judgment cast on parents who don't use carseats or use them improperly.
Somehow carseats have become the litmus test of good parenting for many people. I don't get it. I really don't. A plastic bucket wouldn't be the end-all-be-all determining factor for me. But it is for many people.
I don't think car seats are a litmus test for good parenting, and some of the rhetoric around specific, very expensive car seats, bothers me.
, I don't at all believe in the "well THIS is dangerous so THAT safety measure shouldn't be important" argument.
There are dangers that we can't protect our children from, there are always things we can't and don't do, yes. That is the reality. But how exactly does the presence of one danger mean that we shouldn't address another one? THAT I don't get. Are you saying that we all pick our battles? Well yes to a certain point - but society dictates other points, like leaving a 4 year old home alone is not legal, and riding around without a car seat is not legal.
My lay understanding of the big reason to use carseats is that a child's head is bigger, in comparison to their body, than mine, and their neck muscles not as developed - so in a crash they are much more likely to have damage to their spine due to whiplash. That sounds like physics to me, not rhetoric, and I see the carseat as addressing that difference, in the same way that I would support a newborn's neck.
For the kids who are so freaked out restrained - if I had an answer I would be a genius.
I just don't know, if the restraint is the issue, if car seats are really the problem - being in a seatbelt or even just being in the car might be hard. But to me that is an issue with the child and not the seat... the child's issue is with the seat but unless something is poking them I'm really not sure the seat itself is at fault. I wonder if there's a way to develop a car seat that would provide different sensory input, like straps where you could put on fleece or flannel or cotton covers, or a cushy interior, or something like that, that would help.
I really admire you parents who cope with that level of distress. And SB thanks for clarifying about the abuse part - I was tired last night and misread it.