dingoes running in the sun - Page 25

[schatz]

re: when to start school -- I don't have any questions about my kids cus one is a Jan baby and the other April. I am also January so I was in the middle wrt ages of classmates. But, my niece and nephew are two examples of needing to fit the individual. My nephew was a Sept 12 baby and my niece Oct 9. My brother started my nephew a year later for K rather than pushing to get him in at just 5 yr. He was not ready for K and was smaller than all the other kids. He just graduated from HS this year and is a great kid who really fit in well with his class. My niece was pushed into K early because she was ready. She's now in middle school and it seems to be working out fine. She's always been a level-headed kid. She has been a bit later than her peers in getting interested in boys and such which was fine by my SIL. We'll see what happens when she goes to college. One of my middle school friends skipped a grade in elem school and then another year for math. She was scary smart but had zero common sense. Anyway, the only difference I noticed re: her being younger than us (aside from driver's licenses) was that she wasn't all caught up in boys when the rest of us were. Just like my niece I guess.

One thing that seems weird to me about the school starting age cut off is that my dd's cousin who is only 5 months older than her will be a year ahead in school because she's a July 30 baby. That seems weird to me.

So geo, your senior title should either be something like "stalking master" or "scary smart" cus I now know for a fact that you are scary smart! (and the stalking ability was reconfirmed today as well)

[Geofizz]

Can you tell I'm programming again today?

Originally Posted by pumpkinseed

And it scares the : out of me to think of her going off to college at 17. So I am more thinking in those terms, than not. I had just turned 18 when I went to college and I think I was too young...my mom was 17-hated it and ended up dropping out She blames a lot of it on her age, but also self confidence, etc...Its crazy-I never knew there was such an issue with fall babies until I had one

.... Just keep in mind that people don't have to go straight from HS to college! As with kindergarten red-shirting, it probably does no good if the time is spent doing nothing useful, but if the time is spent travelling, doing community service, learning something independently, etc, then it probably does a lot for getting ready for college. Just about all universities allow you to defer admission for one year for just that reason.

Originally Posted by eksmom

Geo, you have such a sharp eye for child development that this makes me nervous that I'll regret what we're planning to do with EK. And I didn't really realize it when we started, but her preschool experiences are tracking her. As in, if I changed my mind, I suppose (?) I'd have to pull her from the "threes" class that she'll attend next year 3 mornings per week and put her in the pre-K class, where the norm is 5 mornings, and she knows none of those kids and would miss her friends terribly. I don't know, again, we only have her at preschool for social reasons - I really don't care what she learns (unless it's a song about fast food restaurants )..

But if it's for social reasons, she's learning what she needs at home, then it shouldn't matter what class she's in now/next year right?

Ok, I'm gonna make sense of this stupid program now. Green MDC light will go off.

[aguacates]

Originally Posted by 1jooj

My AF came too. Who else?

Me! My second ppAF, and the first was post-iud so I'm not sure it really counted. I am having a wonky time of it. :

[eksmom]

Originally Posted by Geofizz

But if it's for social reasons, she's learning what she needs at home, then it shouldn't matter what class she's in now/next year right?

As in, she could go to K from the "threes" class if we so desired? Yeah, I guess that's true. That's where my ignorance of the role of preschool as prep for school comes in. I have been a little shocked to learn as a mother of all of the pressure some parents put on preschool, with the waiting lists, etc. I know from what I've observed at our preschool that they have the 4s-5s "pre-K" class use backpacks, and they go on more field trips. I am guessing their time is more structured as well. I have no idea if that is an important stepping stone to K or not. I don't believe I ever had that type of preschool experience and sadly, that's about all I'm basing my judgments on (not upholding Megs' standard of well-read dingos, here .

I guess when I say I don't care what she learns, it's because I just haven't worried at all about what she'll be able to do by K. She's read to daily, she just finished listening to her first chapter book, she is trying to write, so I feel like she'll be OK in terms of skills. That's all quite a "natural" process - we don't drill her, we don't do anything very structured. I guess I don't know whether the additional structure of pre-K is needed before K... mostly because I suspect K has gotten a lot more structured (i.e. they have homework now!) than when I was a kid.

[moonshine]

I think that I have mentioned it here before, but re K we have both in our house. DD1 will be starting K this fall, and will be one of the oldest. (cut here is Dec 31) DD2, who is 3!, is scheduled for K the following year, as her birthday is right before the cut off. We will obviously be checking in with her preschool teachers, but I think that she will be ready, as weird as it will be to have them one year apart.

I would think that graduating older would not be a problem. And I fully support taking a year off between high school and college. I did it myself and it was definitely a good thing. It was amazing how many people who told me that they had been able to do the same thing.

[Hollysmom]

Congrats Hope!!!!

[MonikitaUT]

Originally Posted by Plady

Did anyone here graduate from HS early?

By early, do you mean at 17? I did. My birthday is Aug 22, so I was 17 when I graduated. DH's birthday is Aug 24, and his parents started him a year late so he wouldn't be the youngest. We both turned out okay, in the long run. I had some crying-for-my-older-sister issues in Kindergarten, though.. till they called my mom and told her and she got so furious with me I was afraid to ever do it again. But academically I was bored in high school, so it definitely wasn't a problem that I was younger in that regard.

Everyone is worrying about K, and I'm just worrying about if DD will be alright in preschool this fall, two mornings a week, or if she'll cry for me the whole time until she throws up. Yes, I'm the bad mom (and her dad is the bad dad) who never leaves her (his) kid. : But it is her Waldorf school that we've been going to together, so she is at least familiar with the building.. and one of the kids from her old class will be in there with her. And she really does seem to like older kids better than younger or kids her own age, and she'll be the youngest in the class.

Deep breaths.

[aguacates]

Originally Posted by Plady

Did anyone here graduate from HS early?

I did. I did high school in three years. I was gifted/talented tracked from 2-9 grades, then switched school systems where they didn't have a GT program, and just wanted to get the heck out of there so I finished in 2 years. I have a Feb. birthday so most of my senior year I was 16, then graduated at 17. I took a year off before college to live and work in a city and kind of walked into some messy situations because I was living with older peers. In retrospect, a year abroad would have been an excellent option. (I had applied to be an exchange student while in High School, but I had been hospitalized for anorexia in 9th grade, so my application was rejected.) I am with Wendy -it is as hard to be ahead of the curve as behind it. I also think that non-traditional options like dropping out of high school, getting a GED and taking community college courses can be a good alternative for some kids. It would have been a better option for me, as the peer socialization I got in high school was largely negative i.e. drug use, sneaking out, skipping school, etc. I actually had someone turn to me after I answered a question in class and say, "What are you, smart, or something?" As if being smart was on par with leprosy. But, obviously, kids get different things out of high school. If I had been a joiner things would probably have been different.

Anyway, I think about the starting school issue a lot because Z has a late summer B-day, even though our cutoff date is Oct 15. DH has an early August birthday and repeated pre-k to start K at 6, because according to mil, "he had no sit in his bottom". He feels that being the oldest in his class gave him a huge advantage socially. Z is so social that I think she would do fine at barely five, but our school system is so atrocious that I keep hoping a magical alternative will appear before I have to make a choice.

Hope, Congratulations!

Megs, I'm so sorry about your Grandpa. My thoughts are with you. Oh, and I have to say, Television Without Pity is my new favorite website. I think I almost like it better than watching actual TV

[bec]

I was sensible and able to handle going off to college at 17, but I probably would have loved a year abroad before hand.

I love the MIL quote of "no sit in his bottom."

I got new shoes!!! I am now, just itching to get out and run in them. Still hoping to get a run in today. Keep your fingers crossed for me on that one!

[schatz]

Originally Posted by bec

I got new shoes!!! I am now, just itching to get out and run in them. Still hoping to get a run in today. Keep your fingers crossed for me on that one!

Here here for new shoes!


Bec

[HomeBirthMommy]

Hi ladies. I've been busy and exhausted this week with VBS. I started out being the music assistant, but my lead teacher had a sick child, so I was bumped to lead and completely unprepared. We had over 450 kids. It was fun, but I'm so glad it's over.

I've been skimming along and I'm thinking of you all. We leave for the beach tomorrow at 5am. It's dh's bday today and we're heading out to dinner. We got him a bicycle and now it's making me want one. If only my last memory of riding a bike wasn't my aching tush afterward...

to you all

[Plady]

Originally Posted by MonikitaUT

By early, do you mean at 17?

No, I mean more what aguacates is talking about, doing HS in three years. I think not going straight to college is an excellent idea too. In fact I wish there was a mandatory year of service or something for kids so that they could get a peek outside of their usual zone. I mean, even starting college isn't really that big a difference if you've been on the college track anyway. You tend to end up in a school with a lot of kids just like you. For me anyway, it wasn't until I took a year off that learned to appreciate what college had to offer.

Congrats Hope! Have one of those porch daiquiris for me, they sound yummy!

HBM - Have fun at the beach, I was wondering where you'd been this week.

[Megs_BK]

nak

today is the day of loading & unloading & reloading the car. by myself. w/ nevie in the backpack. blork! ii tried to get that bike ride in... drove 1/2 hour after spending at least that long just prepping us/car for the ride. got to trail access point, set up trailer... and realized that dan left the stem that attaches said trailer to bike on HIS bike. Drove back, demoralized, and gave up. we're headed north for the weekend, so before we meet dan, we're stopping at REI for a spare trailer adapter. it's on the way...

I plan a longish run on the lakeshore road in the morning.

well, time for pit stops and to get the dog loaded.

[MonikitaUT]

Dingo Knitters - Help!

Dec 1 st at each end of next 1 row, then on foll 2 alt rows.

Does this mean every other row, or with 2 rows in between the decrease rows? Heeeeeelp, I want to finish my armholes!

By the way, today I p2tog tbl for the first time. Ahhhhh! :

Now back to your regularly scheduled running posting.

[poppywise]

alternate rows means every other row



so decrease on each end twice, on alternate rows, after the initial decrease

[wawoof]

Yow, I'm way behind again.

Eksmom - yippee on your clone

Geo - getting pissed about gender discrimination could raise your pulse...

Updates here: Got a new pair of running shoes yesterday from an awesome store that heat-analyzed my footprints and video-analyzed my gait - the science geek in me loves that. Unfortunately learned during video analysis that my gait is really funky. My left leg/foot (which is strangely the one in which I get arch pain) looks fine, but my right one crosses over, has a really major heel strike, then super-pronation. Very wierd looking on video. Not sure what I can do about it without expensive therapy that I can't afford, though. Note to self, ease back into running to avoid injury due to funky gait. Ran in new shoes this a.m. for 50min and so far so good. A little sore today, but not in a bad way.

I finally made Eksmom's pineapple-cheese casserole for dinner tonight - will get to taste it in about 5-minutes. And course 2 of our uber-healthy Friday night meal? M&M cake made with butter cake mix and M&Ms left over from my psych expt (now, don't ya'll want to be in my studies? ).

[doctorjen]

I graduated high school in 3 1/2 years (my highschool didn't allow less than that regardless of whether you'd met the requirements.) Of course, I graduated early because I was already a mama and needed to be able to work - hopefully not going to be an issue for any of your all's dc! I worked full time and took a couple community college classes during the winter and summer terms before starting full time college in the fall. I know it sounds weird, but I always felt being a mother and going to school helped me keep a good perspective of my priorities and especially in med school helped me be a much more balanced student - sort of like other life experiences help you focus better on college also. I can't say I really recommend teenage single parenting for most kids as a way to develop perspective and priority setting though!

I have a bunch of younger in their class kids. Older ds is Aug 24, making the Sept 1 cut off in IL by 1 week. We had a big debate when he was little - but he was always very verbal and social and his kindergarten screening (we actually had 2 due to worrying about his age) strongly suggested sending him on to K. Interestingly, he thrived in full day kindergarten despite having not had any significant preschool (I took him out as a three year old after 2 mos or so because he was obviously not enjoying it and seemed too young and never got around to sending him back.) He has not had problems that I feel are attributable to his age in school. He has ADHD, but is very bright, and has always had more older friends than younger. Could he be more mature? Yep. But, his older friends seem to struggle in all the same areas and actually of his class group of all the college bound bright kids, he is doing really well comparatively. (His best friend has already dropped out of school twice - in 1 year, another friend didn't even finish out her first semester due to anxiety and homesickness issues, etc. etc. The grade issues he's had that I fretted over so actually were relatively minor compared to some of the issues a lot of his social group has had.) This kid is mister social, though, and has always been a happy and content person.

My next child . . sigh, it remains to be seen. She skipped first grade after an awful year in kindergarten. Academically, she's more than able to do the work in her current grade setting. Maturity and social-wise, she is very mature in some ways, but behind many of her friends in some street wise ways. I'm not sure I view that as a negative, but I think she sometimes does. She does have a close group of friends, but tends to the "misfit" crowd. She's really struggled in middle school, but I can't decide what to attribute to her age and what to attribute to other factors (mostly that infuriating school.) The two things that most influenced me to move her up instead of leaving her in her age group with outside enrichment were how miserable she was working so far beneath her grade level, and the psychologist who evaluated her saying that he felt that she was struggling just as much socially with kids her age as academically - they just weren't compatible, and she was actually happiest in settings where she could be with older kids. She did change schools when she skipped a grade and we've always kept her age as under the radar as possible - and her school environment doesn't seem to socially ostracize bright kids, she actually enjoys being one of the "smart kids" where as I always hated that part. My big plan for her for the next year is to focus on some outside of school stuff to help her realize how big the world is, and how small/insignificant a lot the middle school drama is.

My next kid down is a boy born in late June, so not quite as extreme. He is also very bright (maybe even more so than dd) but was obviously more immature when it was time to start school. He has largely thrived in school, though - especially this year when he had a lovely teacher who really enjoys boys and worked hard on developing his confidence as a speaker and leader. I can't believe the difference in his maturity level this year - maybe just coincidence, but definitely wasn't hurt by a teacher who believed in him so much! He'll be in 5th grade next year, so we'll be heading to middle school soon with him.

I think it's important to be flexible and continously re-evaluate the situation. I wouldn't hesitate to have a child go to college a year late, or take other time off to re-situate if necessary. My mom graduated college at age 53, I got both my bachelor's and professional degrees while parenting - so I tend to think there's no set way you have to do it. I think it's unfortunate, though, that in a lot of ways moving back down is so much less socially acceptable than skipping ahead - makes it hard to say "we'll try one year this way, and if it doesn't work out will go back to the other way."

I think I have to go to bed. I'm so tired. I called to check on my 15 yr old mama, and the nurse says that she has largely spent the whole day nursing her baby - she is so tickled that her baby nurses so well! I wish I could bottle that and sell it.

[wawoof]

I was just reading the posts about starting school early vs late. I was young-ish for my grade, but not excessively so - I started K at 5 1/2. The MUCH greater problem I had was being from a very different social background than my classmates (I spent weekends at peace rallies and summers in Africa, they spent weekends at conservative churches and summers at vacation bible school), being smart, and being outspoken - very bad combination in elementary school. DH ("scary smart" for sure) had similar problems in school in England.

My biggest concern with modern schools is that the extreme focus on testing in many schools tends to kill intrinsic motivation to learn. There is lots of psychological evidence that strong external incentives for behavior - rewards or punishments - can undermine natural desire to do an activity. I look at Ethan and Galen's love of learning, and feel so sad that school could take that away from them. So, a top priority for us is to send them to a school that is alternative in the sense of focusing on love of learning over testing. We're lucky that there are options like that around here (though there are also many insanely competitive, test-focused schools). My ideal school for my kids is one that is challenging, but not fixated on testing. That's not necessarily an easy combination to find because some schools seem to try to encourage love of school by making it too easy. Sigh. We have 6 months before the kindergarten app process starts - we have tentatively decided which schools to apply to, but will keep our eyes open to all possiblities. We do plan to start Ethan at the normal K age, as he's academically advanced and socially fine. My big worry with him is that he has a high need to make choices about what he learns - this has been fine in his Montessori school but I think would be incompatible with some authoritarian-type schools, and he would probably be labeled as a problem-kid in such a school.

Parents make a huge different too, though, in addition to the school. I'm appalled that any of the "redshirting" studies Geo mentioned would get published without controlling for variables like parent income and eduction, because parent characteristics make such a big difference. For example, if you want to encourage love of learning, ask "what exciting things did you learn today!", not "did you get an A on your math test"? And the importance of giving unconditional love cannot be overstated - it allows kids to recognize and work on their shortcomings because they're not terrified that making a mistake will lead to rejection. Of course, it's all so much more challenging in implementation. If I act really happy when Ethan solves a difficult problem, is he going to think I only love him if he's smart? I hope not...

'Night y'all.

[sally Z]

THANK YOU all for your best wishes and vibes.

Got my UC!!!!

baby was born at 12.47pm. He weighs 3.48kg, has lots of dark hair.
Birth went totally to plan and we only called the midwives afterwards to check us both out. I had a small skin nick but nothing that needs stitches.
My sister looked after Rachel during labour but she came to watch him being born and jumped in the pool straight after.

Short version of story, had strong regular but not painful contractions from 2am, went back to bed at 4amish and woke up at 5 with water breaking. No contraction then until 8 or 9 and even then they were totally managable with movement, started filling pool at about 10, got in at 11:30 the water was lovely, contractions got quite intense then, needed to vocalize through some.

I was alone a lot, they were great and gave me lots of space, Dimity then came and sat with me during transision and when the pushing started. We called Rachel and Jenni as the head crowed, head was then born and next contraction the body. I caught my own baby! Rachel then lept into the pool.

Lots of pics in my blog link. I will try and do the full story later.

[Geofizz]

Originally Posted by wawoof

Geo - getting pissed about gender discrimination could raise your pulse...

And course 2 of our uber-healthy Friday night meal? M&M cake made with butter cake mix and M&Ms left over from my psych expt (now, don't ya'll want to be in my studies? ).

Yes, and of course the gender bias went onto racism ( "How many of the foreign students coming next year speak English?" Me: "All of them." Him: "You know what I mean...")

M&Ms: I don't know what psychologists do with M&Ms, but I used them in class for an exercise on radioactive decay.

Originally Posted by sally Z

THANK YOU all for your best wishes and vibes.

Got my UC!!!!

baby was born at 12.47pm. He weighs 3.48kg, has lots of dark hair.

Congratulations Sally!

(3.48 kg: 7 pounds, 10.5 oz)