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Adrenaline and talking to ex-wife - Page 2

post #21 of 23
I actually have noticed that when the ex calls, I do have some weird physical reaction. I get really cold and tight like the blood is draining from my limbs! And we get along ok, too. I think it is that you just never know what the conversation is. Sometimes she calls friendly then it takes a turn and she and dh are yelling. I've never had such a physical reaction to someone.
post #22 of 23
Originally Posted by UptownZoo View Post
Well, I have a theory. I have theories for everything. I take my armchair philosophy verrry seriously!

It's just a fundamentally weird relationship. I mean, DH and I have been together much, much, much longer than DH and BM were, but still, he had s-e-x with her. They had a child. They loved each other, once. And they don't anymore, but still, it's there in the background, even if I don't think about it. Good news? It doesn't happen to me anymore. Took maybe 4 or 5 years, but we have never gotten along at all well; I imagine if we were friendlier with each other it would have been easier.

I never had that feeling with my kids' stepmom. She didn't enter the picture until I was completely, totally, comfortably finished with my relationship with my ex-husband, so that helped. I like her. If I'd met her before my ex-h did, we'd be best friends now and he'd be single!

I used to think about that too. They were in love. He thought he would spend his whole life with her. He had his first child with her. They too were only together for 2 years and we've been together for 7. I don't really feel jealous, or worried that he still has feelings, it is just so odd. They are soooo different now,you wouldn't even think they could know each other.
post #23 of 23
Sort of Update...

I spoke with my SO about the whole "anxiety thing" and he said he completely understood. I asked if he would mind if I went along everytime he goes over to her place to pick up my SS and he agreed! (I was a little afraid he'd react negatively or think I was being controlling or insecure) He even volunteered to work out the schedule so that she comes to pick him up when I'm at home, either before I got to work or after I come home, we both agreed that if I see her more often and go with him to all the "exchanges" that it would become a more mundane event for me and not make me feel so anxious about having contact with her. We'll see how it goes... I feel like I need a drink everytime I see her
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