Coaching help....

[Tulafina]

Not sure if I am in the right place, but here goes! My best friend is having her baby in 2 months and has been having a really hard time finding a doula she "clicks" with. The problem is she can't afford to have an experienced doula and the unexperienced ones just don't seem to be the right people for her and her husband. I was the one who talked her into getting a doula. I had a great doula at the birth of my son and I am so glad she was there to help us. I have told her from the start that if she can't find anybody I would gladly help in any way that I can...well it's looking more and more like I may be there for her during her labor. I am very excited but slightly nervous as well. Does anybody have any book recommendations? Or great internet sites? She is really wanting to stay at home for as long as possible and she is looking forward to a natural birth.

Some history..I had a med free hospital birth-stayed home until 7cm, got to hospital and delivered in an hour. I had minimal tearing(born with his arm above his head) and no interventions. I said no to the eye meds, but wasn't asked about VitK...and he received it much to my dismay. I should have said something but I figured they would have asked:
Thank you so much for reading this!!! Take Care!

[Veritaserum]

You'd probably benefit from The Birth Partner by Penny Simkin. There are others like The Nurturing Touch at Birth and The Labor Progress Handbook, too. I really like The Birth Partner, though.

[Funny Face]

Some of the ones I've read
The Doula Book
Labor Pain
Easing Labor Pain
The Thinking Woman's Guide To A Better Birth

And I'd tell mama to read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth... It's sooo empowering, probably my favorite of all the ones I've read, and I've read ALOT! (If you're tight on money I've read almost all of my books by checking them out at the local library!)

Good luck lady, that's such a wonderful gift you are giving your friend!

[SublimeBirthGirl]

I like the Birth Partner. I actually really did not like Ina May's Guide to Childbirth much at all. The most important part of being a doula is being able to follow the mother's cues. If you can do that, you'll be fine.

[Tulafina]

Thanks Ladies! And sublimebirthgirl....

Can you tell me why you didn't like Ina May's book? Just curious. I am all about following cues and I really want to help her stay calm and focused but I know that most of that will depend on her...right? I know personally that it was such a comfort to have my doula there but I know that when it came down to it, I was able to have him naturally because I believed in myself. I had trust in my body to do what it needed to do and I just needed a shoulder lean on to make the journey more comfortable. KWIM? Anyway, Thanks again. I ordered Penny's book and I'll try to find the others in the Library. Take Care, Julie

[SublimeBirthGirl]

There was a really long thread about Ina May's book but the search function isn't turning up results for some reason. I think it was on the UC board. It just rubbed me the wrong way when I read it, but that thread put it into words. The birth stories irritated me and were sometimes a bit disturbing.

I also meant to say, I'd put aside the word "coaching." IMO, what laboring women need is encouragement and space. They need to be allowed to fall apart if that's what they need to do, without the fear of being attacked with needles at the first sign of "weakness."