I am LOSING IT. I need to either START or STOP labor here...!!!

[Individuation]

I'm 36 weeks. For the record I am FINE with going "over," and have told everyone not to expect this baby until August. I wanted a MELLOW pregnancy. Alas, this seems not to be in the cards.

For the past... oh... month or so... I've been scared of pre-term labor. At 32 weeks I started having occasional "real-"feeling contractions (this is my second child, and I'm talking about the sort of contractions I felt when labor was well underway with my first). Luckily, with plenty of rest, fluids, and not "overdoing it" they went away. Lost the mucous plug at 34 weeks or so. It freaked me out, but I left things alone.

This last week, now that things are officially "safe," things seem to have been gearing up. Contractions will start, build, and then peter out. I'm really trying not to do "self-checks" (which I know how to do and did with my DD) because I don't want to get things started early with stimulation... but I did one gentle clean-hands check and can easily fit 3 fingers into the cervix, which is soft and so low that I basically went "I'm not doing that again! That baby is right there!"

Last night I was up all night with intermittent contractions. We almost called the midwife several times, but they would peter out. Lost ANOTHER mucous plug (???), larger than the first (I have two? ), this one slightly blood-tinged. The baby's head is so far engaged that I'm afraid to sit down with a bump lest I cause brain damage. I'm having the occasional intense contraction, but NOTHING is building up, just... start-and-stop, start-and-stop.

Here's what I want.

I want to either stop this thing or start it. I want a night's sleep and to get through the next month without having all these contractions, or I want some advice on just getting things started and getting it over with.

I never thought I'd be this person. I'm starting to understand why women ask for inductions. Not that I'd EVER want that, but this stop-and-go is wearing me out. Does anyone have any advice? Should I take Benadryl to try to stop it? Castor oil to try and start it? SHould I lie down or walk? Get some sleep? How?

[Blooming]

I've been in you're shoes. I walked around at 5cms dilated for 4-5 weeks. Start, stop. DH come home from work. Call midwife again and again. Very annoying. What eventually worked for me was some cranal sacral work. The baby came a day later after a good six hours sleep.

I send you hugs, I know it's frustrating.

Oh and thanks for the PM it was really helpful.

[Blooming]

Oh I didn't vote, I guess I would hang in there another week. Then start gentle induction methods. Then (with medical go ahead) go full steam ahead. Not induction but perhaps some nipple stimulation, aromatherapy, etc.....

In the mean time maybe eat some good food and watch funny movies to get you're mind off things?

[AuntG]

I didn't vote either but wanted to offer support! I personally would say rest while you can. There will be plenty to do when the time comes!

You made me laugh about the trying to not sit down too hard!
Mine is very much engaged as well and I feel the same way!

[Individuation]

Yeah, I was really kind of kidding on the "induction" thing... my idea of induction is long walks and BJs (I'd say sex, but this baby's hanging out really low, so that's kind of out.) :

[kirk_heidi]

I voted that it is too early. Wait another week and then start some gentle, natural inductions at home. You never know though, it could start on it's own sooner than that. Just try to relax as much as you can....and yes I know how hard that really is to do.

[sophiekat]

: mama, i'm right there with you but about a month behind :
the constant start/stop is making me NUTS! if i make it as far as you i'm thinking of trying to get things going on my own because i know i won't be able to stand another 12 weeks of this!
does benadryl really work? maybe i'll try that . . . . .
hang in there!

[Individuation]

Originally Posted by sophiekat

: mama, i'm right there with you but about a month behind :
the constant start/stop is making me NUTS! if i make it as far as you i'm thinking of trying to get things going on my own because i know i won't be able to stand another 12 weeks of this!
does benadryl really work? maybe i'll try that . . . . .
hang in there!

The Benadryl will make you sleep, supposedly, but I do worry about the baby/drug interaction.

[MsElle07]

I had a similar experience with my most recent pregnancy. It was terribly frustrating, I totally feel your pain. I wanted everything to just STOP so I could stop focusing on it or to hurry up and get started.

I've had big babies, and did gentle things to encourage labor -- walking, sex, homeopathics, nipple stimulation. I had had it by like 37 weeks. All the "encouragement: didn't work. I went to 41 weeks.

I don't think there's a good answer here. We can tell you to ignore it and your body and baby will still pull your focus. But you're normal. (If that helps you feel any better. )

[StrawberryFields]

I had a similar experience with ds in my 37th week. I chose to walk and have lots of sex. Baby was born at 38 weeks 1 day. Emotionally, I was done with the start, stop, start stop start stop. First, I tried resting and wine. Finally, I decided that if he was really not ready to come into the world all the sex in the world wouldn't budge him out of there but if all the contractions needed were a little nudge, I was going to do what I could.

[ccohenou]

Do hands-and-knees, cat and cow stretches, go swimming or floating if you can, try to relax and ignore it. Have a glass of wine if it helps. 36 weeks is early, in terms of breastfeeding, breathing, general neurological maturity. Baby wouldn't be a serious premie of course, but it's early yet. But if s/he is ready, doing ofp exercises might either help things get started or chill them out. When there's lots of prodromal labor it's often an oddly positioned/posterior baby.

[Mama Dragon]

Have some wine and do your best to ignore it

[skueppers]

I'm in the "ignore it" camp.

One thing I found helpful with my last pregnancy (10 days over) was to sleep all by myself in a big bed. It really helped me to get some rest if I could sprawl out however I wanted.

I didn't do it every night, because I also wanted to be close to my husband, but it was really important to me to go into labor as well-rested as possible, so I probably spent every third night alone.

[ChattyCat]

I've had 2 near-term babies (ds was 37 2 and dd was 36 4). It sucks, IMO. Your baby is happy and healthy in your uterus. Keep it there as long as possible!

IMO (not a medical professional, but having been pg and been friendly with many pg women), I think that a glass of wine or benadryl to facilitate sleep can be helpful. Ultimately, it is up to your comfort level.

Try to relax and enjoy these last few days before you meet your baby. I know that it's easier said than done. But, try none the less.

[fallriverfox]

It's like Dallas!

[*Karen*]

You DO NOT want a near term baby. They are just healthy enough for people to leave you on your own, and just early enough to not nurse well at all. HOLD ON.

[myjulybabes]

Oh, how frustrating! That would totally drive me nuts too,the starting and stopping.

But I've gotta vote to try to relax and slow things down. Most 36 weekers do fine, but mine didn't (respiratory distress, ventilator, 2 wks in NICU!), so I tend to be a little paranoid, since I've seen that it can happen, KWIM?

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

Dont know if anyone else mentioned it or no but the mucus plug remakes itself all the time. That is why you lost it once then did so again.

[BelgianSheepDog]

I walked around at 4 cm with a bowling ball between my thighs the last three weeks of my pregnancy. I voted "ignore it" with the caveat that I know that's not easy.

[SublimeBirthGirl]

I had weeks of prodromal labor with my 2nd. It's tiring, but I assumed it was happening because I or my baby needed it. If it was night time, I'd have a small glass of wine and go to bed. The good news is, when active labor did come, it went fast. My labor was less than 4 hours, compared to more than 27 with my 1st, with whom I had very little prodromal labor. The problem is not what your body's doing, but your attitude about it. Try to relax and know that your body knows what it's doing. You're still really early.