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How do you care for an intact penis?  

post #1 of 49
6/27/07 at 12:36pm
Thread Starter 
My husbands 2nd favorite argument for circ is that an intact penis is too hard to keep clean.
And everyone seems to want to tell me about their cousin's boyfriend's brother's nephew who *had* to be circ'ed at age 7 or 9 or 12 because he couldn't keep his penis clean.
This can't be that difficult. Don't you just retract-soap-rinse-let go? Right?
I've never had any, um, experience with an intact penis so this whole foreskin concept is a little new to me. I don't quite know how it works.
post #2 of 49
6/27/07 at 12:43pm
For care of an intact baby, you just wash it like you would wash your finger. DO NOT RETRACT THE FORESKIN EVER. The foreskin is fused to the head of the penis much like your fingernails are fused to the nailbed. Retracting before it is ready hurts as much as pulling off one of your fingernails would. Just wipe off the outside if it needs it during diaper changes. That is it. When your son is much older and is retractable (in his own time) then he would need to retract in the shower and rinse it off but I don't think it's even recommended to use soap because it can be very irritating.
post #3 of 49
6/27/07 at 12:44pm
Well so far my two boys are not retractible (they are 3 1/2 years and 4 months old!).
Caring for and cleaning their penises has never been anything other than washing the rest of their bodies. No retracting, no special care, etc.
That "hard to keep clean" argument is nonsense.
post #4 of 49
6/27/07 at 12:48pm

care of intact children:

from nocirc.org

http://www.nocirc.org/publish/4pam.pdf
post #5 of 49
6/27/07 at 12:50pm
YOU will never retract your child's penis. My 8 year old son's penis does not yet retract and it's normal that some boy's penises don't retract until age 16 or 18, just less common.

You wipe an intact penis like a finger. Both DH (who is circ'd) and I found DS's intact penis way easier to clean when he has poopy diapers than DD's poopy diapers, so many cracks, crevices, a urethral opening RIGHT THERE, just waiting to get a UTI, having to try to be careful so she didn't get infections. It was kind of hard! DS, on the other hand, was so easy. Just wipe, wipe, that's it. The intact penis naturally protects its. The sterile urine coming out keeps it naturally clean. Thing of how our vaginas keep themselves clean, we don't have to go up there and clean them, they naturally do that on their own.

It sounds as if your DH knows nothing about intact penises, which, he doesn't. Those boys who had circumcisions at 7, 9 or 12, should have just been given antibiotics for their infections. Often, infections don't even go away with circ.

Honestly, I can't imagine a 7, 9 or 12 or 16 year old boy who doesn't enjoy playing with his intact penis enough in the shower or bath to get it clean. Seriously. And by teen years, when boys are hoping to be ...um, handled, well, that's a good time to remind them that girls like things down there clean.
post #6 of 49
6/27/07 at 12:57pm
I completely agree, RiverSky. Now that I have a daughter I am completely blown away at how much harder it is to keep her genitals clean. I've never had trouble keeping my boys clean. :
post #7 of 49
6/27/07 at 1:19pm
You NEVER retract, just wash it from outside (and outside ONLY) as it was a finger.
Also you need to make sure no other person ever does that. It is very important that no one messes with your boy’s foreskin. Please read this together with your dh and do take it seriously http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=129378

80% of the world is intact and they have no problem washing their penises. Unless americans have different penises than the rest of the world I can't see them having problems keeping them clean : . I'm from Russia, where circ is unheard of (just like in the 80% of the world, thanks god!) and I have never even heard about such a problem. If you don't let anyone retract your baby he will NOT have any problems/infections/etc. Much MUCH easier than with circ’d penis.
And by the way, it's so much harder to keep a girls' genitals clean than an intact boy’s and yet no one suggests to circ them : ...
post #8 of 49
6/27/07 at 8:21pm
"Hard to keep clean" is one of the many rationalizations that circ'd men who wouldn't have a clue use to make themselves think there is something great about missing part of their penis. Seriously, do they think all other guys are too stupid to roll back a foreskin and rinse??!!! :
post #9 of 49
6/27/07 at 8:30pm
He knows nothing about intact penises. You wipe it like a finger. Nothing more. The reality is that it's CIRCUMCISED penises that are more difficult to keep clean. A fresh mutilation wound? Dealing with having to put petroleum jelly on it to prevent the wound from sticking to the diaper? And having to separate the wound from the diaper when it DOES stick?! Not easier. Oh, and cleaning the little cotton fibers from the still sticky glans (since the glans are still moist after a circ until it become kernalized).
post #10 of 49
6/27/07 at 9:04pm
Circ'ed babies are definetly difficult to clean I had to babysit a few along with my intact son omg of some of them had such deep scar lines then along with some skin that was attached to the bottom rim of the glans then try to clean under there & the 'feces' stick' to the shaft & glans in small pea size . I

It would take me nearly 15 minutes to clean those boys but with my son it would only take 1 quick minute not really 1 minute but pretty quick . Each time I clean a circ'ed boy and it's so hard to even prevent feces of going in the urinary opening talk about a chance for UTI with that . I kept on thinking while seeing those glans exposed & how feces are so close to the meatus hole that how my intact son never had feces on his shaft or glans or even near the meatus.

It continues to make me more grateful each day and after that I go how could anyone who's just givin birth be able to do wound care for around 8-12 days . I was so sleepy after birth I couldn't even get up .
post #11 of 49
6/27/07 at 9:15pm
Circ'ed babies are definetly difficult to clean I had to babysit a few along with my intact son omg of some of them had such deep scar lines then along with some skin that was attached to the bottom rim of the glans then try to clean under there & the 'feces' stick' to the shaft & glans in small pea size . I

It would take me nearly 15 minutes to clean those boys but with my son it would only take 1 quick minute not really 1 minute but pretty quick . Each time I clean a circ'ed boy and it's so hard to even prevent feces of going in the urinary opening talk about a chance for UTI with that . I kept on thinking while seeing those glans exposed & how feces are so close to the meatus hole that how my intact son never had feces on his shaft or glans or even near the meatus.

It continues to make me more grateful each day and after that I go how could anyone who's just givin birth be able to do wound care for around 8-12 days . I was so sleepy after birth I couldn't even get up .

But , if doctors start getting educated because I got into big arguments when i showed some parents they do not need to mess with the foreskin or push it back & a lady told me her grandson doctor told them that and showed pictures of kids who didn't get 'clean' that way & had lost their penis by that.

I asked her for the pictures and guess what she never gave them to me.

i half wonder if the doc sent her pics of gangrene from a complication from a circumcision & played the scare tactic card saying it was 'result of foreskin not being cleaned'
post #12 of 49
6/27/07 at 9:24pm
Even if a boy is retractable and never retracts to rinse under it. The only thing you are going to see is a smell and possibly yeast. Just like if a girl never washes her bits they start to stink and she might get a yeast infection. But your parts wont rot off if you dont wash them perfectly every time.
post #13 of 49
6/27/07 at 9:28pm
You don't need to do a thing. My twin boys are ten and have never had any problems whatsoever. Now I don't go in the shower with them but if things hurt they would tell me. A gentle washcloth with water in the tub is all that is needed or after a messy diaper. No need to retract or use soaps or special cleaning methods. We pay the same attention to cleaning an intact penis as we do to cleaning the elbow.
post #14 of 49
6/27/07 at 9:30pm
let dh read this..........
you dont do a thing you dont force the foreskin back to clean it you wipe it from the base out to the tip and keep on going wiping the scrodum to the bum there is nothing that is needed to be done NOT A THING very easy now if he is cut then there is a crying baby a need to CLEAN the area put on vaseline & gauze crying from pain from fear of pain from the diaper touching him from the way you are holding him crying every pee (been around babys who have had it done it kills me to see people to put the baby in such pain)
post #15 of 49
6/27/07 at 9:36pm
No one but the boy should retract his penis. Before it is retractable, just wipe it like a finger. After that (anytime between age 3 and puberty, or so), he can retract it himself in the shower/bath, whatever, and rinse it. Soap can be irritating.
My 2 intact boys are extremely easy to keep clean- literally do nothing for now.
post #16 of 49
6/27/07 at 9:37pm
Everyone else is right..........just wipe it like a finger and don't retract.

I also wanted to address the emotional aspect of what your dh is going through. So, read this article and DON'T show it to your dh. It's just for you to read and think about. (It's our little secret!) Then you'll know where he is REALLY coming from when he starts spouting about "hygiene" and stuff.

http://www.stopcirc.com/vincent/vuln...ty_of_men.html
post #17 of 49
6/27/07 at 9:40pm
and............read this to find out just how hard a CIRCUMCISED penis can be to care for!!! (Much harder than an intact penis.)

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...&postcount=278
post #18 of 49
6/27/07 at 11:21pm
Waaaaaaaay easier to keep an intact boy clean than it is to keep a circed boy -- or an intact girl -- clean. My ds? Piece of cake. My dd? All those little nooks and crannies with a poop blowout? Yet no one ever suggested cutting off her tender bits to facilitate hygiene.

I hear questions and concerns raised all the time by mothers of circed boys about adhesions, redness, buildup of smegma and other trapped debris......and I just wonder how our society could have been sold such a bill of goods.
post #19 of 49
6/27/07 at 11:39pm
Just in regard to your question about retracting and using soap, I would relate that to pushing back my clitoral hood and rubbing my clitoris with soap and then rinsing. I don't do that. Like everyone else said, when he is old enough, he can do just like you do with your equivalent genital parts (your clitoris/his glans, your clitoral hood/his foreskin) -- open things up as needed and rinse with water in the shower as needed.

Women do usually use some soap around their labias, but not much around the clitoris. I understand it is likewise for retractable intact men -- they use soap to wash off the whole thing and the scrotum, but not a bunch under the foreskin.
post #20 of 49
6/28/07 at 1:10am
Quote:
I would relate that to pushing back my clitoral hood and rubbing my clitoris with soap and then rinsing.
: I know from experiance that burns like a : and I will never try it again : (dont ask )
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