How do you care for an intact penis? - Page 3

[joandsarah77]

I do not understand why everyone says NOT to retract.

I have 3 boys ages, 14, 13 and 3 and as soon as it was okay to do so, about 6 months, maybe a little older, I started retracting their penises while they were in the bath. I made sure to always be gentle and if it ever seemed like it was uncomfortable for them I would stop. I never hurt them and it never caused a problem. I never washed their penises with soap. Just let it rinse in the water for a few seconds.

It's funny with my 3 year old. I retract his penis maybe once a week and he really enjoys it. He hates when his penis "goes away". (I just reread that and it sounds strange. I just mean that he thinks it's funny to have his penis out.)

Anyway, again, none of my boys have ever had a problem with their penises and I made sure to retract it on a regular basis.

If you read the posts on here you will see why
1. Most boys foreskins are attached to the glans. So pulling it back no matter how slowly is like pulling a layer of skin off your lips. You are left with a raw wound that has to heal. Only the owner of the penis can tell how far is too far. By the time they cry out tiny micro tears can have happend.
2. You can introduce germs from your fingers into the area which can then lead to an infection.
3. It is also totally unnecessary. Even if your boys did happen to be retractable at 6 months they still have no need to be retracted. Once the foreskin is loose then soaking in the tub will clean up inside of it anyway. So why give yourself an unnecessary job.

[lovethyspirit]

Wow, thank you for the PDF pamplet and info, its very helpful!

[trmpetplaya]

Originally Posted by maxam67

I do not understand why everyone says NOT to retract.

Anyway, again, none of my boys have ever had a problem with their penises and I made sure to retract it on a regular basis.

Your sons are very very lucky that they haven't had any infections or issues due to premature retraction. Your sons' experiences are rather like circumcised men who haven't had any serious issues with their circumcision. It doesn't mean that circumcision or premature retraction don't cause problems or damage, it just means that some boys/men are very lucky that they don't have more damage or problems from having had them done.

No matter how gently you retract, if the foreskin is not ready to retract then you can cause tears and introduce germs to the tears. It is NOT a good idea to retract a little boy's penis EVER. The only person who should be retracting a foreskin is the person whose penis it is (until dating or marriage during foreplay when the man is fully retractable and his partner retracts him, of course, but that's totally different).

It seems to me that you are saying that because your sons have no lasting damage (that we know of) due to being retracted, that retracting a baby's penis can't be a bad thing. This is not good information to be spreading. Your sons were/are lucky - no more and no less. Putting other mamas in the position of more than likely irreparably harming their sons just because your sons happened to get through a traumatic, damaging situation relatively unscathed is irresponsible, IMO.

We say not to retract so that other mamas can learn that premature retraction is a very BAD thing without them and their sons having to learn it the hard way. We hope to educate mamas so their sons can avoid having lasting problems or having to be circumcised later in life because of the misinformation that babies' penises are supposed to be retracted.

We say that retracting is bad and damaging because it IS. My Uncle had to be circumcised because he was prematurely retracted as a child and consequently my whole family believe that circumcision is a good thing because it had to be the foreskin that caused my Uncle's infections. It couldn't possibly be from the advice by doctors that his mother retract him at every diaper change : Because of that bad advice and the subsequent problems it caused, all of my cousins, my other uncles, and my brothers are circumcised.

love and peace.

[painefaria]

Thank you for all of the great information. We started to discuss circ after our Bradley instructor gave us a handout. We researched and spoke to our families. I was suprised to find out that if given the choice now my mother would not have circ'd my brother. We did decide not to circ our beautiful little boy and so far no one has given us any grief. Actually, all of the Dr's that we have seen have commended us on not having the circ completed.

[Quindin]

My brother had bad problems due to premature retraction and was circumcised at age 4 because of it. Please, DO NOT retract you sons' foreskins!

[staceylibbert]

Whew...

Thanks for the input. I guess I am very fortunate in that there has been no damage, no redness, swelling irritation, etc. My pediatrician seemed surprised when I told him I had retracted it, but didn't freak out, so I never knew otherwise. I'll just leave it alone from now on. My son doesn't seem to love it by any means, but he's never cried or seemed distressed, so maybe he just lucked out. What I'm wondering is why this info. was not passed along to me in the hospital when I opted not to circumcise him? Hmmmm....

[Quindin]

Originally Posted by staceylibbert

What I'm wondering is why this info. was not passed along to me in the hospital when I opted not to circumcise him? Hmmmm....

Because most doctors in the US do NOT know about this!
They live in a culture where circumcision is almost standard and where the importance of the foreskin is unknown and undermined.

[Yulia_R]

Originally Posted by polihaupt

Because most doctors in the US do NOT know about this!
They live in a culture where circumcision is almost standard and where the importance of the foreskin is unknown and undermined.

that is absolutely true!

Please make sure you and your dh read this http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=129378 so you can protect your son from their ignorance.
yulia.

[joandsarah77]

I am from Australia and we were given 0 information at the hospital, 0 information at any well check up. They check that testicles are decended at birth and again at 6 weeks, then ask how he's peeing then the area is never looked at or mentioned again. At least I don't have to worry some Dr will try retraction.