would you send your caucasian child to an all african american school? - Page 8

[Missy]

Originally Posted by mpeel

I would not here because the racism is so bad that I would expect my daughters to be bullied beyond belief. Also, as a girl, I would fear for her in other ways. It doesn't matter how caring the teachers are when the students, while maybe not behaviorally bad, would not be caring towards my children.

I can't even separate my emotions about this. I am angry, disgusted, saddened...beyond anything you could possibly imagine. You actually think this??? You could wrap your brain around those words and believe them so strongly that you could actually type them out??? I hope to God that my boys never encounter this level of ignorance and bigotry, where they are reduced to some primitive creature to be feared. Unfortunately, if someone is capable of expressing that thought, of "verbalizing" it, knowing POC are reading, I have little doubt that all we can do is prepare as best as we can for that kind of ugliness.

[purplegirl]

Originally Posted by gethane

Yes, well, look at her location.

(See! I can stereotype too!)

I could match her nastiness by criticizing her inability to write properly, but I won't do that because I have way too much class for that.

[meowee]

Originally Posted by mpeel

Also, as a girl, I would fear for her in other ways.

Okay... when I read this I thought "No, no, she doesn't mean that..." but I guess she did???

I fear for my girls being around boys in general. I would prefer an all girls school. But to be specifically afraid of AA boys????! Let me tell you I was molested and assaulted by a *white* boy. If anything the AA boys I encountered were more chivalrous and respectful toward me.

If you think white males are any "safer" than AA males, just google "serial killers."

[menudo]

Oh, my. I'm sorry you have such a low opinion of African american boys. I really wish there were some way to end this "black boys want to rape our white daughters" crap, but that would require people to stop being racist, which apparently is impossible.

I have been biting my tongue, this is what I was thinking but said in a much nicer way. I mean, what should one do if EVEN WORSE, their daughter likes the school and ends up with a black boyfriend. The horrors! My sadness and anger cannot be put into words. Well they could but I believe it would be a MAJOR UA violation.

Nikki-DD was in a class last year that was almost all white. One child was "black" and no matter what DD was assumed and classified as "white" (again we are quite a mix but technically she would be latina on Dad's side and white on my side, except DH is very dark brown skin and assumed black). So when talking about MLK and desegregation to the 3rd grade, white teacher says all kids kept looking at black kid. Teacher, thinking she is helping and trying to take pressure off the little boy says "We would not have (insert black childs name here) or (insert DD name here) in our class if not for MLK." : Let's disect:

We=us white people are "allowing" non white people in OUR school.

Boy=different than US.

DD=this is where it gets fishy. She was unsure of DD ethnicity/race but had seen DH. She called out DD who then had kids ARGUING about her race. Kids who had not thought much of race prior. They told her and the teacher DD is white. It got very uncomfortable for DD, to say the least!

I broke this down to the teacher, who truly was just a clueless privileged white woman. She had good intentions but was so off base! I explained what she did, wording, etc. I hope she truly learned from my breakdown of how bad she screwed up!

[bczmama]

"I will say also in a genuine question-how can an all white staff cultivate an environment of true learning when it comes to culture, differences etc of there is no true example shown? It cant ALWAYS be beneficial for white people to teach about liberation in Mexico or slavery in ths South.....maybe I am wrong....I really wanna find a ground and stand on it about this."

So only the Jews can teach about the Holocaust

And only someone of French heritage can teach French history

And only someone who is of German heritage can sing Wagner

And only someone who is of English heritage can teach Dickens and Shakespeare.

I find that ridiculous. A good history teacher should be able to teach facts, and then express the different points of view major historians have about those facts. While I agree it is useful to have a diverse faculty for purposes of role-modeling, I do not feel it is necessary from the perspective of "only an African American has the right to teach/can "really" teach the history of the civil rights movement."

[meowee]

Originally Posted by De-lovely

I will say also in a genuine question-how can an all white staff cultivate an environment of true learning when it comes to culture, differences etc of there is no true example shown? It cant ALWAYS be beneficial for white people to teach about liberation in Mexico or slavery in ths South.....maybe I am wrong....I really wanna find a ground and stand on it about this.

I think it's wrong to assume whites can't teach AAs or to assume that an AA student's only place of learning will be the classroom. Anyway in those situations the students might teach the teacher with their opinions and views. Learning can go both ways in the classroom.

Anyway, the fact that AA parents are choosing to send their children to this school (since it's a private school, not a zoned public school) makes me think the staff must be acceptable to them on some level. There is a Haitian contingent in the school, maybe their expectations are different from the AA contingent, but I have no idea, really, and hate to generalize. But maybe Haitians have different feelings about whites in this country since they don't descend from a legacy of US slavery, and thus there is less tension about having a white person teach their child.

[menudo]

If I am correct, the ideal is a diverse staff. Sadly, many kids of color are conditioned to think only white people can be teachers, teach, or be in power when they go to schools where the faculty is all white and the students are not. Having role models from all over the world, of all colors, of all walks of life is a benefit to children. It opens their eyes to THEIR own possibilites, the fact THEY can do it, ANYBODY can do it! Not JUST white people.

[kittywitty]

Originally Posted by Missy

This concerns me far more than the idea of a white child being the only white student in the school. How do you have a school that is at least 99% black and have no. black. teachers. As the parent of children of color, that would make me hesitate more than anything else.

:

That is strange. This is a public school, right?

[happyhippiemama]

Originally Posted by loraxc

If you (generic you) are so fired up about changing the system, then intentionally move to a school zone with an awful reputation and get in there and fight. Or devote time and energy to lobbying for a less racist and economically injust school system.

I think I will.......

[Heffernhyphen]

My preference for my kid would be a fairly equal distribution of kids of all flavors . . . some black, some white, and a sprinkling from around the globe . . . some rich, some poor and some in between . . . some more academically advanced, some needing more help . . . some who like sports, and art, and music, and nature. Maybe even one or two Republicans just for diversity's sake. I'd like him to have all kinds of influences. And I'd like for him to feel like he belongs, wherever that may be.

I used to teach in a school that was 99% black kids. The white art teacher put her white kid in Pre-K there. One day the little boy painted his entire face with a black marker so he could fit in. Don't think kids don't know if they're different.

[Nikki98]

Originally Posted by happyhippiemama

I think I will.......

Thanks, happyhippiemama.

[purplegirl]

Originally Posted by Heffernhyphen

My preference for my kid would be a fairly equal distribution of kids of all flavors . . . some black, some white, and a sprinkling from around the globe . . . some rich, some poor and some in between . . . some more academically advanced, some needing more help . . . some who like sports, and art, and music, and nature. Maybe even one or two Republicans just for diversity's sake. I'd like him to have all kinds of influences. And I'd like for him to feel like he belongs, wherever that may be.

I used to teach in a school that was 99% black kids. The white art teacher put her white kid in Pre-K there. One day the little boy painted his entire face with a black marker so he could fit in. Don't think kids don't know if they're different.

Kids start to recognize racial differences around the age of 3yrs old, so of course in a school setting like that, they will know they are different. I remember longing for long straight hair. I think I'm pretty well adjusted for someone who, as a child, was told --overtly and indirectly, that white skin was prettier and better.
I think children are far better at adapting and being accepting than adults. It's when adults interject their fears and bias that we create situations that are unkind and hurtful. What a revealing thread this has turned out to be.

[Missy]

Originally Posted by menudo

If I am correct, the ideal is a diverse staff. Sadly, many kids of color are conditioned to think only white people can be teachers, teach, or be in power when they go to schools where the faculty is all white and the students are not. Having role models from all over the world, of all colors, of all walks of life is a benefit to children. It opens their eyes to THEIR own possibilites, the fact THEY can do it, ANYBODY can do it! Not JUST white people.

And this is exactly what concerned me about the staff! It's not so much that I don't feel that a white teacher is unable to effectively convey certain aspects of history or literature--although with some people, there will be a little creative re-writing or omission--it's more the implications behind an all-white staff. That right there is a strong illustration of institutional racism and I would worry about how my children would internalize it. If my kids were white, I would still worry about how they would internalize it. It's not a healthy model for any child.

[cutekid]

Okay, I went to a Primarily African American school. Actually it was an Alternative school for kids who misbehaved, and it happend to be such it was mostly Afro-American Males.
My experience was GREAT!!! Infact it was the best semester of highschool I ever had.
Now that being said. Since my DF and I have researched schools for his kids, the truth is in the numbers. Its undeniable, those schools with more Afro-Americans have lower testing schools across the board. We have also looked as socio-economic statusand still Race make up plays a huge roll in the performance of all the childern. I don't know why, and since we live in a county where all the schools get equal funding unless they raise money themselves that's not an issue either.

Now, i said I don't know/ maybe. Why because of my own expeirence, being a WHITE FEMALE. And, seeing the evidence in perfomance scores. If it happens that the best school in the area is primarily afro-american then so be it. But there's no way I'd send my child to any school(no matter the race demographics) that is low on the scale of performance. There's not much to judge a school by unfortunately, other than public testing scores. ANd it may not be the best judge of a particular school but its all I have to go on right now.

Also, I may sound racist, but I am highly opposed to school redistricting to make things "more racially equal". I grew up where the last legal busing was done and too me that was worse than having schools that were heavliy white or black. Most of the busing was to a school out in teh country that would have been 90% white/hispanic (lots of migrant families) the kids that were bused in were brought from the town. Many of the kids were low income, and had to be up at 6AM to be at school at 8AM. I am sorry but that's also puttin childern at a disadvantage. My Parents watched parents of bused childern BEG the school board to have their childen go to school in their neighborhood. Most of the kids who were bused in often missed school, they were more likely to go sleep in class because of sleep deprivation. Also, because they were coming from in town, they had to change buses several times, so agian there was a chance they miss a transfer bus.
While busing is no longer legal, redistricting is very much legal. Well it was until last week when the supreme court ruled against Brown V Board of Education.

Denise

[Nikki98]

Originally Posted by menudo

Nikki-DD was in a class last year that was almost all white. One child was "black" and no matter what DD was assumed and classified as "white" (again we are quite a mix but technically she would be latina on Dad's side and white on my side, except DH is very dark brown skin and assumed black). So when talking about MLK and desegregation to the 3rd grade, white teacher says all kids kept looking at black kid. Teacher, thinking she is helping and trying to take pressure off the little boy says "We would not have (insert black childs name here) or (insert DD name here) in our class if not for MLK." : Let's disect:

We=us white people are "allowing" non white people in OUR school.

Boy=different than US.

Interesting, actually I feel like De-lovely's point of having teachers that have been thru/or are a part of group that historically has had to suffer (in some way) is a valid point. Of course that doesn't mean that a person of another race couldn't teach the subject matter-I'm not saying this-but when you have someone who is teaching you who has actually experienced something, then the infomation being taught may have a deeper impact, of course this IMO.

[menudo]

Kids do notice all kinds of differences, but our reactions to these differences is WHAT matters! Don't freak when your kid comments on someones color (this has happened to us). Teach them! Kids say things-sometimes innapropriate. ABOUT EVERYTHING! but the minute it is in referance to race or color or ethnicity (I am referring to innocent comments like "Why is he brown? Or why does she speak differently?") people freak. Use it as an example of kids knowing races are "different" etc. Different seems to equal "bad/wrong" to so many! It also brings out the parents own discomfort with race issues!

My OWN DD once announced (around age 6) her friends Mom couldn't be her Mom because her friend was brown and the Mom wasn't. Talk about embarrasing because I am "white" and DH "brown", but in that moment it made sense to DD. So we just talked I said "look at your own family dear." She felt silly and we moved on.

[pixiewytch]

Originally Posted by bczmama

"One day a couple of upper class looking white kids showed up in our yard. It was the oddest sight and I had no idea where they had come from. Anyway, my son was overjubilant toward them as he is with everyone else, trying to convince them to join some imaginative game. They looked at him with such disdain. It was as if they didn't know how to just "play". I imagined them so used to so many "things" that they couldn't get it. "

Okay this cracks me up. Were the kids carrying little louis vuitton bags, and talking on their new I-phones? What marked them as "upper-class"? And would you have assumed they were "upper-class" if they had been black and dressed the same way?

Maybe they were shy and found your son's "overjubilance" to be "overwhelming".

The children were dressed in what looked like school uniforms, collared polo shirts with nicely pressed pants, very clean haircuts, not a speck of dirt on them, that sort of thing. I'm sure that is common in some neighborhoods but in ours kids get very dirty, wear playclothes, are usually dark skinned, and aren't timid about playing with kids they don't know so it was a rare sight to me. Maybe you are right and they were shy. Who knows....just not used to seeing that around here so I tend to chuck it up to class or cultural differences. If that seems shortsighted of me I do apologize.

I don't like using a lot of labels myself but on a message board sometimes using a quick adjective is the easiest way to get a picture across without getting too wordy.

[lovethyspirit]

I wouldn't simply because school is hard enough these days without the pressures of scores and then you add the pressure of being an outcast to it? It's not fair to a child. I went to a high school where i was one of the only white kids and trust me, it's not a fun time. You worry more about being beat up and harrassed than your test scores.

[menudo]

I wouldn't simply because school is hard enough these days without the pressures of scores and then you add the pressure of being an outcast to it?

So color alone will make the child an outcast? NO! I was the fat and weird kid in school-my color had nothing to do with it. I later had a friend, thin, blond, hazel eyes, olive skin-GORGEOUS. She had been picked on (by white kids like her) from early on-so in HS she was STILL an outcast! This is t\the whole "WHAT ABOUT THE KIDS!" mentality. Pure ignorance. You never know who will be picked on or why. It takes one jerk to start something and boom-outcast for life.

But stress the color issue to your kid, conditon him/her to beleive they are constantly gonna be picked on and looked down upon due to their color and yes, they will be sure to create their own hell. Racism is real but it is not always US vs. them. Someone very close to me was told they would always be hated due to his color by his parents. As an asult he assumes every single negative thing that occurs to him happens b/c of his color. Sure soem are, but most are not. He does nto hate his color but is paranoid of it! He grew up in a diverse area, mostly POC yet his own family hated dark skin. They drilled it into him he SHOULD'VE been lighter. Crazy.

[purplegirl]

Originally Posted by lovethyspirit

I wouldn't simply because school is hard enough these days without the pressures of scores and then you add the pressure of being an outcast to it? It's not fair to a child. I went to a high school where i was one of the only white kids and trust me, it's not a fun time. You worry more about being beat up and harrassed than your test scores.

I really want to control my snark but it's hard. However, aren't most kids teased at some point during their school tenure and isn't it usually about something that makes them different? Do black children hold a patent on teasing and being aggressive? Do black children ever feel outcast for any particular reason.
If you had a child who was differently abled, would you avoid putting that child in situations with other children? Wouldn't you empower your child to think and behave as if they can deal with whatever life brings them? If I had a child who was gay, I wouldn't discourage him/her from being in a majority straight school because I feared teasing. Is it likely to happen--probably but to my knowledge, you can't avoid all eventualities of life but I certainly don't expect that everyone in a particular environment will all behave in the same manner.
I don't want my child to suffer needlessly, but I don't think that an all black environment automically means you'd be setting your child up for torture. That is the impression I get from a lot of posters and it's sickening.