Come on! Tell me how lucky I am!

[candiland]

Alright, just trying to get myself psyched up for the fact that my ex's gf just moved in with him and the kids.

So, okay, it's fine, but a little bit unnerving. I mean, that IS kind of.... I dunno.... weird, though. There will be another female who is around my kids/influencing them/raising them just as much as I am. It's a strange feeling.

I do feel like I am lucky, though, in the sense of the kind of person she is. Well, she's only 23 (ex is.... 39, I think?), so I do worry that she might bolt, leaving the kids kind of traumatized. But other than that... she just graduated college with a high GPA, she's an artist, she's a vegan, she's a writer, she makes her own clothes............... so, okay, exie-poo could have done a lot worse for himself. I also gave her all my Waldorf/natural parenting books a while back when she expressed interest in Waldorf education, and I may point her to this website, too.... (although she could sit there and read all these posts about herself, lol, which may be kind of strange.)

I don't even know why I'm posting this. I guess for as open minded and "cool" as I try to be with things, the reality is hitting now and I'm just kind of on edge......

[Twice as nice]

I'm sorry you're feeling stressed out about this. I'm sure with time you'll feel better. Its always a bit unnerving when another person enters our children's lives, especially if they will be playing a large part in it and influencing them. From what you've said about her, she does sound like to good person though. The fact that she seems to share or at least expresses interest in some of your ideals (like Waldorf) looks like a really good sign. Even though no one can predict what will happen in the future, just be optimistic and positive about it. Hopefully everything will work just fine. She may even turn out to be a very positive influence in your DC's lives. They'll have one more person who is there to love and support them

[Oceanjones]

Sounds like a part you is relieved that he is with someone decent who you can feel confident about that your kids will be treated well when they are with her. You ARE lucky and your kids are lucky too!

OTOH I'm sure it's a bit disconcerting to know there will be another woman in their lives. She may be great and somewhat like-minded but I think we all wonder deep down if our kids will end up liking them better than us. Even though we know that wouldn't happen.

Think of the good things that come with your ex having someone good.

You won't have to worry as much when the kids are with them.

You'll feel better about them being taken care of.

You might actually be able to enjoy a little time to yourself to do things that you enjoy instead of worrying all that time. Like take a bubble bath with the door open and some good music playing and candles burning...(not easily accomplished when the kids are home)

I think it will be great for all of you!

[candiland]

Thanks, mamas. I think the shock of it has worn off a bit. I guess it's also kind of weird to me b/c I left him with the house we bought together back in '99. Both my kids were born in it, too! Hopefully, her creativity and motivation will breathe some new life into that place, 'cuz let's just say ex's talent was certainly NOT maintaining a clean, organized home, lol.