The Birth Story of Emma Joy. . . .
The whole story begins on Monday, July 1, 2002. I had stopped working regularly a week or two before, but I was beginning to get a little bit of cabin fever. I decided to schedule a few clients (reflexology) for the 1st. After working a few hours, I noticed my contractions had started again, and this time they were pretty regular and strong. They continued the whole day, and even into the night. By the time I woke up the following morning, they had stopped again. This cycle lasted the entire week—contractions sometimes during the day, some days few or none. I just kept telling myself that when the time was right, my body would know, and I would actually go into productive labor.
Saturday evening, the 6th, Carter (my son) and I went to church as usual. Contractions started around 7:30, during the service, but I just assumed that it was the same old prelabor thing again. I did borrow my sister’s watch to time the contractions, though, and they were coming every 3 minutes or so, although sometimes they were further apart. I decided to head home soon after church was over. I told my sister (Loretta) I would call her if there was anything happening.
Soon after I got home, I started thinking that maybe this was really it. I hurried Carter off to bed, because I wanted to take a bath and see if that would make the contractions go away. I took a bath, and they were still going strong and regular. I called my sister while I was in the tub, which I believe was around 11:00 or so. We talked for a while, and she timed contractions while I focused through them. I remember wondering aloud if I should call my doula, but I didn’t want to bother her if this wasn’t it. Loretta, my sister, encouraged me to call, saying maybe Kara, my doula, could help me figure things out. Kara was glad I called, and asked me if I wanted her to come. I told her I wanted to be alone for a little while longer yet, and that maybe I’d try to get some sleep. Well, that didn’t work very well—sleeping, that is.
I headed downstairs to the living room, and got on the birth ball. I soon figured out that I was more comfortable leaning over it on the floor. Somewhere around here I called my sister and she decided to come over. I knew that this was really it soon after I got off the phone with her. She said she was leaving shortly, and I looked forward to her arrival. The lights were dim, but I had the TV on for some background noise. I called Kara, too, and she said she would leave in fifteen minutes, which meant she’d get here in around 45. I also called my mom and she didn’t really believe I was in labor. She told me to call her back later to “let her know what’s going on.” I remember telling her that’s exactly what I was doing, and then I hung up on her because I couldn’t talk through contractions and I was getting another one. She called back then, and I think she talked to my sister, who had finally arrived. I remember thinking it was taking everyone an awfully long time to get there.
I spent my time on the floor leaning over the ball until 2:30 or so. Contractions were lasting a long time and were coming every 2 minutes from the time I really knew labor had begun. Kara decided maybe it was time for me to head to Molly’s (my midwife). I was planning on having the baby there because she doesn’t do homebirth in other people’s houses. I HATED having to move. I got into the backseat of Kara’s Explorer and leaned over the ball the whole way there. It only took about five minutes, but I hated getting out of my groove just so we could go to Molly’s. When we got there I made them wait to help me out because I was having a contraction. Molly answered the door after a few knocks. She was holding a flashlight (she’s Amish, so has no electricity), and let us into the back room where she has some beds set up. She lit a few lanterns and watched me for a little bit. She asked me if I wanted her to check me, so I got into the bed and she told me I was 2 cm, but very soft. She told me I should probably go home, and I made the mistake of asking her how long I would have to go yet. She said maybe not until Monday. Keep in mind I was having contractions every 2 minutes and they were lasting at least a minute or minute and a half. I was a little discouraged, but I think I was also holding a grudge for having to leave my house when I was definitely in a groove. So we went home and I told everybody they could leave, too, if they wanted. They laughed at that and we all settled in upstairs.
I forgot to mention that Loretta had taken Carter to her house so that Oscar (her husband) could watch him, which was around 2 or so. Carter has a twin bed, so my mom decided to try to get some rest in his room. Loretta and Kara stayed with me in my room. I had the ball on my bed, leaning over it. Sometimes I had it on the floor. I had to have a bowel movement once, and I remember how awful the contractions felt when I was on the toilet. Loretta fell asleep for a little on my bed, and then offered Kara to take turns staying up with me but Kara refused to sleep. I remember when the sun was coming up, and I was so exhausted by this point, but our bodies are amazing, aren’t they?! I remember being able to fall asleep during contractions. It felt like it was at least fifteen minutes, but I only had 2 minutes in between. I told Kara that I had pain in my right hip, so she had me put one leg up and lean into it during contractions. That hurt like crazy, but it moved the pain around into my other hip, so I assumed the baby was changing positions. She had me do that a couple more times until the pain in my back stopped. At some point I began to make myself bounce on the ball so the baby’s head could bounce on my cervix. It hurt so badly but I chanted quietly through them, saying “I can do this, I can do this, I can do this.”
Around 7:30 I guess, we left again for Molly’s. We got there and she told me I was 5 cm. She said she was going to church, but that her daughter that helps her was going to stay behind to be with me. Her daughter had her own daughter, who was probably about 1 ½. She was eyeing the birth ball up and down, and I could tell she thought it looked really fun. I got into the tub for a while, probably about an hour. It helped, but not as much as I had thought it would. I don’t think it was big enough, and my neck just couldn’t get comfortable. I got out and Lydia (Molly’s daughter) just kept coming in every now and then to see me. I thought it was really neat how she had her little girl right there with her. She brought water. And I bounced, and bounced. That’s what I did for soooo long. I just had to get that baby moved down. I knew it was working, I could feel her moving down. They tell me that my tailbone was swollen like a baseball. I don’t remember pain there, though. Molly got back sometime later, but I don’t know when. My sister had run to McDonald’s sometime, too, but I was not interested in food AT ALL. Especially that greasy stuff. I decided to get up into bed, and I felt like I was getting a little pushy. Molly said to just go ahead if I wanted to, so I did. I didn’t get much relief from it, so I just waited until my body REALLY did it by itself. I was leaning over the back of the bed, letting that force just bear down on me. It felt like it started at the top of head and just kept crushing down, harder and harder. There was no way I could’ve fought that force even if I wanted to. I got off the bed and pushed. I would stand and slowly squat as the force got stronger. Kara was holding my weight on one side, while Loretta was on the other. Loretta (who was pregnant) couldn’t hold me up very long, so my mom took over. Then I decided to get on all fours, but I asked for the birth ball to lean over in front. That’s when the pushing got very productive, and I could feel the baby moving down and my bones opening up. Molly had gotten her tray ready, and she was using warm cloths on me as I pushed. I will never forget how good that felt! Suddenly I felt like maybe this was taking too long, and I just wanted my baby out! I pushed harder and longer than my body told me to, and the head came out. Loretta said later that Molly said, “oh!” because she wasn’t expecting it to come out at that moment. After the head was out, she just slid out the rest of the way. Everyone else saw her first, but they didn’t announce the sex because I had before said that I wanted to see for myself. I looked around my shoulder and saw my beautiful baby just lying there on the floor, on a pad, by the wood stove (it wasn’t on). She was wide-eyed and just looking around. I talked to her and said hello, and then my sister told me to look what it was. It never dawned on me to wonder. I looked and saw she was a girl! I wanted to pick her up but I had to do some fancy footwork to get turned around with the cord still attached. When I picked her up I put her against my skin and Molly told me not to pull too hard because of the cord. I tried to nurse my baby but she just kissed me! She was content just to be next to me, and then after a while I felt my placenta trying to come out. It slowly came out after a little push, and then Molly showed me what it was and where my baby had lived.
Everyone told me I did beautifully. I was actually quite proud of the feat I had accomplished. I never lost control, and I proved to myself that I am a strong woman. When Emma was born I kept saying, “I did it! I did it!” One thing that helped me during the labor was remembering some things I had learned while pregnant—open hands to keep relaxed, repeating encouraging things to myself, and visualizing my cervix opening. I ended up tearing only slightly, which didn’t require stitches. I think I tore because I got impatient!
Anyway, we got into bed, and later my sister brought Carter to see us. At first, he was disappointed she’s a girl, but he fell in love with her in no time at all! She was 6 pounds, three ounces, and was 20 inches long. Born at 2:05 pm on July 7, 2002. Named Emma Joy. And, oh what a joy she is! We went home a few hours after she was born. Now I have my boy and my girl!
The whole story begins on Monday, July 1, 2002. I had stopped working regularly a week or two before, but I was beginning to get a little bit of cabin fever. I decided to schedule a few clients (reflexology) for the 1st. After working a few hours, I noticed my contractions had started again, and this time they were pretty regular and strong. They continued the whole day, and even into the night. By the time I woke up the following morning, they had stopped again. This cycle lasted the entire week—contractions sometimes during the day, some days few or none. I just kept telling myself that when the time was right, my body would know, and I would actually go into productive labor.
Saturday evening, the 6th, Carter (my son) and I went to church as usual. Contractions started around 7:30, during the service, but I just assumed that it was the same old prelabor thing again. I did borrow my sister’s watch to time the contractions, though, and they were coming every 3 minutes or so, although sometimes they were further apart. I decided to head home soon after church was over. I told my sister (Loretta) I would call her if there was anything happening.
Soon after I got home, I started thinking that maybe this was really it. I hurried Carter off to bed, because I wanted to take a bath and see if that would make the contractions go away. I took a bath, and they were still going strong and regular. I called my sister while I was in the tub, which I believe was around 11:00 or so. We talked for a while, and she timed contractions while I focused through them. I remember wondering aloud if I should call my doula, but I didn’t want to bother her if this wasn’t it. Loretta, my sister, encouraged me to call, saying maybe Kara, my doula, could help me figure things out. Kara was glad I called, and asked me if I wanted her to come. I told her I wanted to be alone for a little while longer yet, and that maybe I’d try to get some sleep. Well, that didn’t work very well—sleeping, that is.
I headed downstairs to the living room, and got on the birth ball. I soon figured out that I was more comfortable leaning over it on the floor. Somewhere around here I called my sister and she decided to come over. I knew that this was really it soon after I got off the phone with her. She said she was leaving shortly, and I looked forward to her arrival. The lights were dim, but I had the TV on for some background noise. I called Kara, too, and she said she would leave in fifteen minutes, which meant she’d get here in around 45. I also called my mom and she didn’t really believe I was in labor. She told me to call her back later to “let her know what’s going on.” I remember telling her that’s exactly what I was doing, and then I hung up on her because I couldn’t talk through contractions and I was getting another one. She called back then, and I think she talked to my sister, who had finally arrived. I remember thinking it was taking everyone an awfully long time to get there.
I spent my time on the floor leaning over the ball until 2:30 or so. Contractions were lasting a long time and were coming every 2 minutes from the time I really knew labor had begun. Kara decided maybe it was time for me to head to Molly’s (my midwife). I was planning on having the baby there because she doesn’t do homebirth in other people’s houses. I HATED having to move. I got into the backseat of Kara’s Explorer and leaned over the ball the whole way there. It only took about five minutes, but I hated getting out of my groove just so we could go to Molly’s. When we got there I made them wait to help me out because I was having a contraction. Molly answered the door after a few knocks. She was holding a flashlight (she’s Amish, so has no electricity), and let us into the back room where she has some beds set up. She lit a few lanterns and watched me for a little bit. She asked me if I wanted her to check me, so I got into the bed and she told me I was 2 cm, but very soft. She told me I should probably go home, and I made the mistake of asking her how long I would have to go yet. She said maybe not until Monday. Keep in mind I was having contractions every 2 minutes and they were lasting at least a minute or minute and a half. I was a little discouraged, but I think I was also holding a grudge for having to leave my house when I was definitely in a groove. So we went home and I told everybody they could leave, too, if they wanted. They laughed at that and we all settled in upstairs.
I forgot to mention that Loretta had taken Carter to her house so that Oscar (her husband) could watch him, which was around 2 or so. Carter has a twin bed, so my mom decided to try to get some rest in his room. Loretta and Kara stayed with me in my room. I had the ball on my bed, leaning over it. Sometimes I had it on the floor. I had to have a bowel movement once, and I remember how awful the contractions felt when I was on the toilet. Loretta fell asleep for a little on my bed, and then offered Kara to take turns staying up with me but Kara refused to sleep. I remember when the sun was coming up, and I was so exhausted by this point, but our bodies are amazing, aren’t they?! I remember being able to fall asleep during contractions. It felt like it was at least fifteen minutes, but I only had 2 minutes in between. I told Kara that I had pain in my right hip, so she had me put one leg up and lean into it during contractions. That hurt like crazy, but it moved the pain around into my other hip, so I assumed the baby was changing positions. She had me do that a couple more times until the pain in my back stopped. At some point I began to make myself bounce on the ball so the baby’s head could bounce on my cervix. It hurt so badly but I chanted quietly through them, saying “I can do this, I can do this, I can do this.”
Around 7:30 I guess, we left again for Molly’s. We got there and she told me I was 5 cm. She said she was going to church, but that her daughter that helps her was going to stay behind to be with me. Her daughter had her own daughter, who was probably about 1 ½. She was eyeing the birth ball up and down, and I could tell she thought it looked really fun. I got into the tub for a while, probably about an hour. It helped, but not as much as I had thought it would. I don’t think it was big enough, and my neck just couldn’t get comfortable. I got out and Lydia (Molly’s daughter) just kept coming in every now and then to see me. I thought it was really neat how she had her little girl right there with her. She brought water. And I bounced, and bounced. That’s what I did for soooo long. I just had to get that baby moved down. I knew it was working, I could feel her moving down. They tell me that my tailbone was swollen like a baseball. I don’t remember pain there, though. Molly got back sometime later, but I don’t know when. My sister had run to McDonald’s sometime, too, but I was not interested in food AT ALL. Especially that greasy stuff. I decided to get up into bed, and I felt like I was getting a little pushy. Molly said to just go ahead if I wanted to, so I did. I didn’t get much relief from it, so I just waited until my body REALLY did it by itself. I was leaning over the back of the bed, letting that force just bear down on me. It felt like it started at the top of head and just kept crushing down, harder and harder. There was no way I could’ve fought that force even if I wanted to. I got off the bed and pushed. I would stand and slowly squat as the force got stronger. Kara was holding my weight on one side, while Loretta was on the other. Loretta (who was pregnant) couldn’t hold me up very long, so my mom took over. Then I decided to get on all fours, but I asked for the birth ball to lean over in front. That’s when the pushing got very productive, and I could feel the baby moving down and my bones opening up. Molly had gotten her tray ready, and she was using warm cloths on me as I pushed. I will never forget how good that felt! Suddenly I felt like maybe this was taking too long, and I just wanted my baby out! I pushed harder and longer than my body told me to, and the head came out. Loretta said later that Molly said, “oh!” because she wasn’t expecting it to come out at that moment. After the head was out, she just slid out the rest of the way. Everyone else saw her first, but they didn’t announce the sex because I had before said that I wanted to see for myself. I looked around my shoulder and saw my beautiful baby just lying there on the floor, on a pad, by the wood stove (it wasn’t on). She was wide-eyed and just looking around. I talked to her and said hello, and then my sister told me to look what it was. It never dawned on me to wonder. I looked and saw she was a girl! I wanted to pick her up but I had to do some fancy footwork to get turned around with the cord still attached. When I picked her up I put her against my skin and Molly told me not to pull too hard because of the cord. I tried to nurse my baby but she just kissed me! She was content just to be next to me, and then after a while I felt my placenta trying to come out. It slowly came out after a little push, and then Molly showed me what it was and where my baby had lived.
Everyone told me I did beautifully. I was actually quite proud of the feat I had accomplished. I never lost control, and I proved to myself that I am a strong woman. When Emma was born I kept saying, “I did it! I did it!” One thing that helped me during the labor was remembering some things I had learned while pregnant—open hands to keep relaxed, repeating encouraging things to myself, and visualizing my cervix opening. I ended up tearing only slightly, which didn’t require stitches. I think I tore because I got impatient!
Anyway, we got into bed, and later my sister brought Carter to see us. At first, he was disappointed she’s a girl, but he fell in love with her in no time at all! She was 6 pounds, three ounces, and was 20 inches long. Born at 2:05 pm on July 7, 2002. Named Emma Joy. And, oh what a joy she is! We went home a few hours after she was born. Now I have my boy and my girl!
