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March '08 Homebirths - Page 4

post #61 of 87
I'm a homebirth midwife, so of course I'll have a homebirth! In the beginning there was a possibility I had a contraindicaiton to homebirth but that has proven not to be the case, so now I can say with certainty that I'm planning a homebirth. I'm the only midwife in my area, so I will most likely be having a UC, which is DH's dream and has been since baby #1. It will be an unconventional UC, though, in that I want to be supported by a female friend or two, rather than just DH (who loses all credibility with me when I'm in labor!). Ideally I'd have a great midwife and colleague who would attend me, but unless someone moves here in the next few months, I'm going to have to give up that "ideal."
post #62 of 87
we are planning a hb with a midwife. we planned to have ds at a birth center, but my labor was unusual and quick andwe accidentally had him at home! this time i just want to be prepared at home and have a birthing tub. i just have to find a midwife who will come all the way out to the boonies for us..............
post #63 of 87
3rd time home waterbirther here - this time I'm going to try having the older kids present with a caregiver. Not sure how I'll feel about the audience, though! I've also switched to a new midwife for this birth who is far more intuitive and connected.
post #64 of 87
I'm planning a homebirth with a midwife, and am probably going to have a tub available for a potential waterbirth. I'm finally getting around to lining up interviews at almost 10 weeks along, so hopefully I'll have a care provider picked out by the end of my first tri . I'm feeling better and am starting to get excited for my birth. Oh, we're also planning to have a doula.
post #65 of 87
I'm planning a VBAC water homebirth. I just met with/ interviewed my midwife today and LOVE LOVE LOVE her!!!!! Hooray! Hopefully, this one won't turn breech at 37 weeks!
post #66 of 87
speaking of having other kids there.... my dd will be 2 and a few months when the baby comes. Grandma will be here to entertain her, but they really don't have a place to "go" as we live so far out in the country, and that time of year is still frigid. Will it be that big of deal to have her in the house?
post #67 of 87
Quote:
Originally Posted by mnearthmomma View Post
I feel that a lot of midwives should be a little more willing to trade or barter for some of their services for wimmin who just cannot afford the entire fee....that's the socialist in me speaking though
AFAIK, many of the midwives in my area, as well as most of the doulas, will provide reduced-fee or even free services to women who truly can't afford it. Or they will refer women to someone who is less expensive (such as our doula with DS, was still finishing her training, so she was super cheap). I have not approached our midwife with a barter request, my guess is that she'd be receptive to part payment in exchange for goods I can offer her, but at the same time, her family needs to eat, too, and a barter is only a good deal if BOTH parties are satisfied. Her family is really no better off financially than we are.

I do agree with you in spirit, but at the same time, she is a professional who is providing a service to me. A service that costs her money as well as time. I have no problems paying her for her expertise, for the experience and education she brings to the table, and for the time she takes away from her own young children to be with me.
post #68 of 87
We are planning on a homebirth this time. I've already contacted my mw. I'm hoping also to have a tub available, and my children with me. Especially my dd, who will be five by the time this Sprout comes along. She has been extremely interested in childbirth since before she was two, so I'd very much like her to be a big part of this.
post #69 of 87
Quote:
Originally Posted by sarahtar View Post
AFAIK, many of the midwives in my area, as well as most of the doulas, will provide reduced-fee or even free services to women who truly can't afford it. Or they will refer women to someone who is less expensive (such as our doula with DS, was still finishing her training, so she was super cheap). I have not approached our midwife with a barter request, my guess is that she'd be receptive to part payment in exchange for goods I can offer her, but at the same time, her family needs to eat, too, and a barter is only a good deal if BOTH parties are satisfied. Her family is really no better off financially than we are.

I do agree with you in spirit, but at the same time, she is a professional who is providing a service to me. A service that costs her money as well as time. I have no problems paying her for her expertise, for the experience and education she brings to the table, and for the time she takes away from her own young children to be with me.
ITA with you. I speak and should have qualified, of more rural areas where people tend (at least in our rural area) to be without medical insurance and cannot afford the cost of hospital birth, seek out a MW and find they cannot even afford her, choose UC and end up in the hospital anyway because they chose UC out of necessity. know what I mean?

Now I am a UC-er, but not out of necessity. regardless if we have insurance or not, I choose UC because I feel more comfortable and feel it's healthier and safer for me and my babies. There are few MWs around here and those that are near charge EXHORBITANTLY (sp?) and two that I spoke with regarding some research I was doing, were not willing to barter down their fees no matter what. That, to me, was a little disheartening considering WHAT these wimmin do and WHERE they do it.

sorry for going OT....just wanted to clarify!
post #70 of 87
I am so happy! I spoke with my midwife of choice yesterday and she is totally willing to come out to our place for a home birth. DH and I are thrilled. I set up an appt with her for early Sept. Neither of us felt like there was any reason to meet any sooner unless something was wrong. It is funny, I feel so differently and more relaxed about this than with my first!

Now to get the house ready..................

DS will be present for the birth with a friend watching him. We will decide at the time how much he needs to see or be in the room with me during the birth, but I know he will want to see the baby right away after s/he is born. He will be almost 3.
post #71 of 87
We met with a mw yesterday who is willing to travel down to our house (1 1/2 hrs)! I really feel comfortable with her, and dh did too- the only issue is how we're going to pay for it! We're building an addition to our house right now (with a corner jauzzi tub in the master bath!) so most of our money has a place. I really hope we can work it out, I REALLY don't want to go to the hosp again and dh isn't comfortable w/ UC.

For those whose dh's are on the fence- the mw let us borrow two dvds that she said often answer all of dad's questions and get them more comfortable w/ the idea- "Birth As We Know It" and "Homebirth, the Spirit, the Science, and the Mother". We have't watched them yet but I'm looking forward to it!
post #72 of 87
Mnearthmama, I find the opposite is true for me...I'd LOVE to barter (but only up to half of my fee), and many people I see would rather pay the money than have to do the work involved in bartering .
post #73 of 87
Quote:
Originally Posted by Charmie981 View Post
Mnearthmama, I find the opposite is true for me...I'd LOVE to barter (but only up to half of my fee), and many people I see would rather pay the money than have to do the work involved in bartering .

I am SOOOOO glad to hear that, believe me.

I do work with Trust Birth up here and am known as the weird pregnancy lady by a lot of people, but I have also been able to help A LOT of Wimmin understand that they have it within them to birth at home-some w/o a DR. But like I said, some of them either go UC because of necessity and come out fine but some go UC out of necessity and then have complications and end up hospitalized and chastized anyhow. I just really wish that either the state funded med aid would pay for mw at homebirths (they pay for MW but ONLY in a birthing center....closest birthing center here is about 2 hours away!) for those not confident enough to go UC. it's really a double edged sword.

I am a student MW also and my motivations are really in tune with my own birthing philosophies of "you can do this! With or without me!" And I am sure 90% of MWs out there have that for their motivation as well...empowering a womon in her most beautiful moments, but those that don't it's just really hard to wonder what they are in it for, you know? I mean NO disrespect, it's just something that is terribly needed in a lot of areas and it isn't something that is accomodated very simply either by the few MWs who won't bend for the sake of harmonious birth or by state beaurocracy. NWIM?
post #74 of 87
Ah, yes, the state beaurocracy...I offer a discount for medicaid clients, but of course only the very committed pay for a homebirth. The rest get their "free" birth from the hospital. And if ONLY the government would understand that the choice for many women is not hospital or home, but home: with or without help. It seems like the midwives I know in my state who have gotten in trouble, it has been because of a situation where the doctors thought the mom should have been in the hospital, but the mom had said that she wasn't going, midwife or not!

I've found that the midwives who are adamant about their fees have been burned one too many times. As of right now, I have two clients whose babies are close to a year old who owe me money...one hasn't paid a dime and never will, I'm sure (I have done free births, but in this case, that was NOT the agreement!). And I've only been in practice just over a year, so I know that midwives who have been doing this for 20 years or so have lost money trying to be patient or supportive or work with women in tough financial situations. It just stinks that a few people can ruin it for everyone, but that's what has happened in many cases .
post #75 of 87
Quote:
Originally Posted by jillybeans View Post
speaking of having other kids there.... my dd will be 2 and a few months when the baby comes. Grandma will be here to entertain her, but they really don't have a place to "go" as we live so far out in the country, and that time of year is still frigid. Will it be that big of deal to have her in the house?
It is totally up to you and your comfort level. When my ds was born, my dd was 22 months. I tried to keep her with me, but she was being such a little (adorable) stinker, and I was doubled over with laughter and contractions, I had to ask my mom to take her out. If grandma will be able to keep your dd occupied if need be, so that you can focus on your job, then I see no reason she shouldn't be in the house.
post #76 of 87
Jill - I think she will be fine as long as you have someone who can entertain her and take her out of the room as needed. Who knows....she may even sleep through the whole thing! You may want to borrow some birth videos so that she can see and hear what labor and birth look like. It's important for kids to hear those noises before they hear you make them for the first time. I am not sure how many of mine I will have present this time as I just had my 2 oldest in the room during my last birth. One more thing to think about....
post #77 of 87
I'm still on the fence. I had a lovely midwife assisted hospital birthing center birth (whew!) the first time around. I don't necessarily want to go back to the hospital. I've made my first appt. at a free-standing birthing center and the midwives there do homebirth as well. I still have some questions, but I'm absolutely open to the idea.
post #78 of 87
For those having a hard time finding what you need, I wonder if you've checked out your tribe here on MDC? There could possibly be other people local to you with references.
post #79 of 87
This will be my 2nd HBAC.

We're not sure yet who will be attending our birth.
post #80 of 87
This will be my first homebirth, DS was born in a birth center that was in a hospital, and it has since closed.

Midwifery is legal here, but not covered by insurance, so we will have to pay out of pocket. But we ended up paying out of pocket the last time even though it was a hospital birth, because the luxury of giving birth naturally in a birth center is not covered by insurance.

We're certainly not rich, but we'll scrape the money together because it's totally worth it. I just spoke to a midwife today who told me she is really hands off and we're meeting this week to get to know each other better. I can't wait!
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