More progressive to bottle-feed??

[babylove2007]

I just heard this as a "feminist" phillosopy and am wondering if others have heard it before. The person in question believes that bf'ing is antifeminist because it tethers the woman to the baby and the home, and is therefore for housewives only. It is more "progressive" to bottle-feed and share responsibilities with the husband.

That sounds very first-wave (as in, 1930's-ish feminism). I had thought since the 70's, feminism was supporting bf'ing as empowerment of a woman's body. Of course I can see where she's coming from, since bf'ing *does* take more time and the milk has to come from you, but I don't see it as an excuse to formula-feed.

Anyone familiar with this philosophy?

[rachelsmama]

I've heard a similar argument, although it certainly wasn't put forward in a "feminist" way. Honestly I suspect it just reflects the person's discomfort with nursing in public.

For me it's a lot more liberating to be tethered to a baby in a sling than to be tethered to the stove and the formula aisle of the grocery store.

[momma2libby]

[QUOTE=For me it's a lot more liberating to be tethered to a baby in a sling than to be tethered to the stove and the formula aisle of the grocery store.[/QUOTE]

I couldn't agree with you more.

[wannabe]

If you are going to do a job, do it properly.

If someone makes the decision to have children, they need to accept that you're going to be tethered to that child for a significant period of time. You're their MOTHER!!!!! I don't see how doing a half-arsed job at work makes you a better woman, why would doing a half-arsed job at mothering?

If someone isn't willing to put in the time, then they shouldn't have kids at all, then they can pretend they're male all they like.

Feminism gave us the choice as to what we want to do, so I'd say we have even less excuse to do it badly than someone who was brainwashed into having three kids a picket fence and an apron when what they really would have wanted is to be a bush pilot in Africa.

[alegna]

Originally Posted by wannabe

If you are going to do a job, do it properly.

If someone makes the decision to have children, they need to accept that you're going to be tethered to that child for a significant period of time. You're their MOTHER!!!!! I don't see how doing a half-arsed job at work makes you a better woman, why would doing a half-arsed job at mothering?

If someone isn't willing to put in the time, then they shouldn't have kids at all, then they can pretend they're male all they like.

Feminism gave us the choice as to what we want to do, so I'd say we have even less excuse to do it badly than someone who was brainwashed into having three kids a picket fence and an apron when what they really would have wanted is to be a bush pilot in Africa.

Wow..... I love you... : I agree 100%

I've heard this too. Though usually in a more round-about way.

"well women should have the CHOICE how to feed their babies..."

-Angela

[glorified_rice]

Originally Posted by wannabe

If you are going to do a job, do it properly.

If someone makes the decision to have children, they need to accept that you're going to be tethered to that child for a significant period of time. You're their MOTHER!!!!! I don't see how doing a half-arsed job at work makes you a better woman, why would doing a half-arsed job at mothering?

If someone isn't willing to put in the time, then they shouldn't have kids at all, then they can pretend they're male all they like.

Feminism gave us the choice as to what we want to do, so I'd say we have even less excuse to do it badly than someone who was brainwashed into having three kids a picket fence and an apron when what they really would have wanted is to be a bush pilot in Africa.

I couldn't agree with you more. Very well put.

[phreedom]

Originally Posted by wannabe

If you are going to do a job, do it properly.

If someone makes the decision to have children, they need to accept that you're going to be tethered to that child for a significant period of time. You're their MOTHER!!!!! I don't see how doing a half-arsed job at work makes you a better woman, why would doing a half-arsed job at mothering?

If someone isn't willing to put in the time, then they shouldn't have kids at all, then they can pretend they're male all they like.

Feminism gave us the choice as to what we want to do, so I'd say we have even less excuse to do it badly than someone who was brainwashed into having three kids a picket fence and an apron when what they really would have wanted is to be a bush pilot in Africa.

Couldn't have said it better.

[babylove2007]

That was very well said, wannabe. We aren't allowed "easy way outs" in our jobs, so why in our parenting?

[readytobedone]

yes, i have a friend who thinks this way, actually. i HATE this particular distortion/misappropriation of feminism. i consider myself a strong feminist, but try as some might to refute biological determinism, it's ludicrous to pretend that there are not differences between men and women. lactation is one of them.

it's so sad that some women think in order to be feminists they have to eschew anything that smacks of "natural" womanhood. we will never get anywhere as a society, IMO, until we acknowledge and embrace the natural and human.

[BCFD]

Originally Posted by wannabe

If you are going to do a job, do it properly.

If someone makes the decision to have children, they need to accept that you're going to be tethered to that child for a significant period of time. You're their MOTHER!!!!!

Actually if someone makes the decision to *BIRTH* children would be a more appropriate response. I have children via adoption and we bottlenurse.

I've heard this too. Though usually in a more round-about way.

"well women should have the CHOICE how to feed their babies..."

This brings up a really excellent point and something I've often wondered before. Don't most feminists also lean more towards pro-choice with their reproductive freedoms? So, it would only make sense that bottle or breast is also a choice to a feminist? I often wonder how many lactivists are pro-choice (reproductive wise, that is).

Interesting thread.

[~Heyokha~]

Originally Posted by readytobedone

yes, i have a friend who thinks this way, actually. i HATE this particular distortion/misappropriation of feminism. i consider myself a strong feminist, but try as some might to refute biological determinism, it's ludicrous to pretend that there are not differences between men and women. lactation is one of them.

it's so sad that some women think in order to be feminists they have to eschew anything that smacks of "natural" womanhood. we will never get anywhere as a society, IMO, until we acknowledge and embrace the natural and human.

I couldnt agree more

[~Heyokha~]

Originally Posted by wannabe

If you are going to do a job, do it properly.

If someone makes the decision to have children, they need to accept that you're going to be tethered to that child for a significant period of time. You're their MOTHER!!!!! I don't see how doing a half-arsed job at work makes you a better woman, why would doing a half-arsed job at mothering?

If someone isn't willing to put in the time, then they shouldn't have kids at all, then they can pretend they're male all they like.

Feminism gave us the choice as to what we want to do, so I'd say we have even less excuse to do it badly than someone who was brainwashed into having three kids a picket fence and an apron when what they really would have wanted is to be a bush pilot in Africa.

umm.......... well said!!!!!!!!

[bellymama]

this is something from waaaay back in the feminist early days. women were not given much choice in terms of being outside the family circle...we all know how time consuming bfing is, what a commitment it is...these women were trying to break out of the roles that society had boxed them in...its kinda like when a woman in a corporate business enviornment has to "out man the men"...its an extreme view point that came about in an extreme time. it has no place in the feminist world now...luckily for us our foremothers have allowed us to have choices...however, in this day in age, the choices are now leaning in the opposite extreme...staying home with your kids is seen by many as wasting time: ...again, an extreme...hopefully the feminist movement will find a happy medium and embrace the feminine power in both the family circle and the bigger world.

[the_lissa]

One of the reasons I breastfeed is because I am a feminist.

How dare formula companies try to undermine my body and tell me that I can't nourish my baby.

[maizy]

breast v. bottle

Originally Posted by the_lissa

One of the reasons I breastfeed is because I am a feminist.

How dare formula companies try to undermine my body and tell me that I can't nourish my baby.

Me too, BUT feminism is about choice. Should I want to buy formula that is my choice. My friend could not breastfeed for medical reasons and I chose to donate my extra breast milk to her precious daughter because she thought it was important that her dd get breast-milk. That was her choice for her child.

Feminism is about CHOICE ladies. We can work, we can stay home, we can breastfeed or not, home-school or not, raise a family with a husband or not. Not all women on this earth have that option and men... well, they don't have this option.

As for bottle feeding being superior and some how MORE feminist, I'd argue that is an antiquated idea when looking at long term health of humans but I must concede that is my opinion yet I never felt "tethered".

[the_lissa]

Of course it is about choice. That is one reason why I am against making formula prescription only and things like that.

[babylove2007]

Originally Posted by readytobedone

yes, i have a friend who thinks this way, actually. i HATE this particular distortion/misappropriation of feminism. i consider myself a strong feminist, but try as some might to refute biological determinism, it's ludicrous to pretend that there are not differences between men and women. lactation is one of them.

it's so sad that some women think in order to be feminists they have to eschew anything that smacks of "natural" womanhood. we will never get anywhere as a society, IMO, until we acknowledge and embrace the natural and human.

That's true--and if a lot of female executives hold that attitude (not saying they do, but "if"), the less support there will be for things like pumping at work, etc.

[spughy]

I don't believe that true feminism is about making women just like men.

I think true feminism lies in celebrating and acknowledging the facets of womanhood, and embracing ALL that femininity has to offer. This includes the ability to do many of the same jobs that men do, but it also includes female-specific traits like giving birth and breastfeeding. To bring forth life and nourish it is EMPOWERING. Giving away the nourishing part of that equation, *voluntarily, to a FORMULA COMPANY is saying you think you're not worthy of that power, the power to grow that little body and soothe that little mind. And I'd hardly call that feminism.

Let's face it - breastfeeding is a pretty awesome thing to do. It truly is a gift, not a burden. It is only in a society that prizes material gains and monetary power over LIFE itself that breastfeeding could be considered less important a task than furthering a career.

*bottle-feeders by necessity and adoptive mamas, please note this very important distinction, I definitely do not mean to say that you have given away any of your womanly powers

[Beccah+twins+1]

Originally Posted by spughy

ILet's face it - breastfeeding is a pretty awesome thing to do. It truly is a gift, not a burden. It is only in a society that prizes material gains and monetary power over LIFE itself that breastfeeding could be considered less important a task than furthering a career.

: well said.

[wannabe]

Sorry, BCFD, I should have been more explicit - obviously breastfeeding isn't necessarily part of being a brilliant commited mother, especially if you didn't gestate your children!