I'm another graduate who can't resist coming back to see how my friends are doing. I'm 42 and nine weeks along as a single mother by choice via low-tech at home inseminations with a known donor. I also have an adult daughter and a teenaged son, who were born within the context of a brief but unfortunate marriage. I'm pretty sure this will be my last child, but you never know; I once felt the same way about my fifteen year old.
I'm so, so sorry about MC but proud of you for standing up for yourself and letting him know that a phone relationship was not acceptable; I've done the LDR thing for seven years (counting the two years we didn't speak because we hated each other) and it sucks big time! If I didn't know just how bad it sucked, I would be posting on the "TTC 30+" thread instead of this one because Bean would be about seven years old instead of ten weeks gestation! I wasted so much of my life on that man (who I still love and who i have broken up with and gotten back together with a half a dozen times since I last mentioned him here) and I honestly think that my lack of a viable marriage has to do with the fact that I am so NOT a commitmentphobe that I will stick with a relationship that is obviously going nowhere and miss out on the opportunity to begin a new relationship that could be much better.
My biggest regret is not ending a brand new not particularly promising relationship when a man I had known and admired for years as a friend finally told me that he would have liked to be something more. This happened when I was about 22, and our timing has been off ever since--I'm involved when he is single and vice versa! He would have made an outstanding husband and father and the other guy wasn't smitten enough to have been very hurt by a rejection.
Stupid stupid stupid!
I hope things go well with Bob on Saturday and that someday you will be able to look back on this and pat yourself on the back for not making the mistake I did.
Your chart does not look very promising, but tbh, the generalized grumpiness sounds VERY familiar to me because that was exactly how I felt the day I stomped off to the drugstore to buy what turned out to be the test that gave me a BFP; it could just be the progesterone playing tricks on you, since I had much worse morning sickness during the cycles I used a (much milder and weaker) over the counter progesterone creme than I ever had during this real pregnancy. dd said I was impossible to live with and begged me to stop using it.
Your symptoms and discomfort are very real, so please be easy on yourself even if it is just artificial hormones giving you artificial first trimester ickiness.
always showed up on her own without my having to stop the creme, but it was a much weaker concentration of progesterone than the suppositories. You will need to continue the suppositories for most of the first trimester (if you are pregnant) and will probably need medical advice about weaning off of them slowly. I still blame my own carelessness with the creme for my possible chemical back in December.
I'm being downright rude ignoring your question about the betas; I haven't had them done, nor have I had an early ultrasound. I'm going a rather extremely noninvasive route with this pregnancy so far and am feeling better and better about it, although I know that my choice isn't for everyone. An example is that after reading the research on false positives from the glucose urine dipsticks, it was painfully obvious to me that I would be better off using a glucometer (electronic device that insulin-dependant diabetics use to measure blood sugar levels) which is so much more accurate and really isn't that much more expensive.
Everyone I know who is going the OB route is still doing the dipsticks because they are under "Doctor's Orders" and are completely uninterested in reading what the Journal of Family Medicine had to say about the dipsticks two years ago.
Oh well; to each his own.