Where are all the not-yet-single mamas who stalk this forum?

[blissful_maia]

Sometimes I feel like an imposter, reading all these posts. Stuck in an unhappy, often abusive and always manipulative relationship. Just waiting until I am in an emotional and financial place to pick up my girls and go to a place where the three of us can be happy. Feeling really down on myself for not doing it sooner, not setting a better example for my children about what a relationship should be, feeling trapped.

Just wanted to let you mamas know that I am here, drawing lots of inspiration and hope from the strength you all have! The great, happy mamas you are, and that I will be one day soon.

[Lisa_Lynn]

Awww sweetie, I wish you all the happiness in the world that you deserve. Just think postive it will help.

HUGsssssss

[MotheringBliss]

I've been where you are...

My heart goes out to you and your girls... I PM'd you.

[meandmine]

Hey, it is SO ok to take your time. Get it together, make your plans and then take the steps to take care of yourself and your children.

Let me to you -- doing it unprepared or in a haphazard way .... oh, so so so not good ...

And I speak from a stomach churning reality -- my stbx (and I can now say that with some real venom) has just given my a concrete example of why it isn't cool. He is a mess and although I did everything I could to make his move out smooth (including lining up muscles to help him and taking my kids away for the second time -- this time for four days) he still managed not to fully move out!!!!! His **** is everywhere in more ways than one.

Anyway, my situation is symbolic of why it is better to have a plan. The kids will do much better and you will too.

When you do get out you will be teaching them lots about self-care and integrity and eventually about healthy relationships. You are doing it even now, by getting ready!

Hugs,

M

[SMC_to_be]

Originally Posted by meandmine

When you do get out you will be teaching them lots about self-care and integrity and eventually about healthy relationships.

:

[CherylE]

I'm coming out of an abusive situation and it is HARD getting out and it's abosultely hard at first. Hard enough that I remember thinking it was way less stress/easier being with him. I want to warn you of that - you may not immediately feel better, or less stressed or that things are easier it takes a lot of time.

I'm 6 months separated and it's just now getting easier than being married to him was - some of the legal stuff is handled, the logistical (job, childcare, housing, child support) and I'm getting into a groove with the single parenting thing.

It was abosultely the right thing for me to leave the situation I was ini- no way I wanted my 4 dd's to think that was normal - but initially it was hard - but walk it out a few months and it'll get better. Though the manipulation still continues separated...but it's finally to the point where it's less now for now anyway. (hugs). Take your time ,get a plan together.