Pelvic Organ Prolapse, Support Thread - Page 6

[Kiddoson]

Glad to have found this thread, I am 16 days PP and I think I have uterine prolapse. I am really freaked out by this as I am a horse trainer and I need to RIDE to make money. Am I totally screwed here? Really worried....

[~*max*~]

Originally Posted by Kiddoson

Glad to have found this thread, I am 16 days PP and I think I have uterine prolapse. I am really freaked out by this as I am a horse trainer and I need to RIDE to make money. Am I totally screwed here? Really worried....

Try not to worry too much - you are early days still for a diagnosis, and your body is definately still healing. I would recommend resting as much as you can, doing some exercises to stregthen your pelvic floor, & you might also want to check out Mayan Uterine Massage. I have had some good results w/it. If you haven't looked into www.wholewoman.com yet, you may want to. It is a wealth of information.

Perhaps you could wear a support garment while riding, to help hold everything in place? (I ride too, but have not in some time.)

[indignantgirl]

Originally Posted by fruitful womb

Yes I've seen that website! Its a great website I'm going to by her book and the exercise video she offers. Like, tomorrow! We get paid yea!!

If you haven't seen/tried it yet, Christine also highly recommends the dvd Dance the Chakras with Ana Brett. I bought my copy at Amazon. She says it's the closest thing to a woman's yoga she's found and that except for the one jack-knife pose it all keeps with the "Whole Woman" postures. I find that to be true. I feel great afterwards, instead of that "golf ball" sensation I usually have after anything too strenuous. My condition has continued to improve with the Whole Woman book and the dvd.

Originally Posted by fruitful womb

Your story with the forceps sounds a lot like my story. The OB (second OB for a second opinion) said my pelvic floor was shot when the OB that delivered my first child cut a fourth degree episiotomy and used forceps. He didn't even give me a chance to push. Maybe the no pushing thing might have been a good thing. I've been thinking a lot about a UC on our next delivery. Dh won't stand for it and I've become frighten of MW at least the one who helped me deliver my ds 3m ago. She ordered me to push on all three of my HB with her as my MW. Shot out a 10ber in 2 min and my recent baby was 9lb delivered in 4 min. I want to learn more about no pushing to deliver.

I did push for a while before the forceps (although my dr didn't even tell me she was going to do forceps, she just cut me and started jamming them in) but I was induced with a baby who hadn't even dropped yet, so the whole labor was slow going.

Midwives are great if you have the right one. Maybe if you can find one you trust between now and then. I have a midwife I worked with throughout my pg to become educated and also to have a midwife if I felt I wanted one during labor. She's never been to a birth of mine, but she has assisted many of my friends' births and she's the most hands-off midwife possible (unless the mama wants her to be hands on). But you have to watch out, because I think midwives like to think they'll be hands off if you want, but sometimes their training takes over.

The no-pushing thing is the way to go, wherever you birth. I was kneeling both times to shorten the birth canal and just breathed through contractions while my body literally ejected the babies. Like having diarrhea of the uterus. It really only took a few minutes each time.

For the record, my midwife has been at many births where the mama has "breathed out" the baby and says that most women will do that naturally if not urged to push, and if they are upright.


Once again, great thread! I love finding a place to talk about this without feeling embarrassed or "defective".

[wombatclay]

Though I should add....not all babes breath their way out! I was upright/squatting (and hands and knees, and dangling, and side lying, etc) and undirected for 4 hours of uncontrollable pushing (no pressure to start pushing, no counting, no "just a little more")... and still needed "help" at the end to resolve a shoulder dystocia. Some day I'd love to simply breath out a babe but, well, that doesn't seem to be the way it works for me!

[indignantgirl]

Originally Posted by wombatclay

Though I should add....not all babes breath their way out! I was upright/squatting (and hands and knees, and dangling, and side lying, etc) and undirected for 4 hours of uncontrollable pushing (no pressure to start pushing, no counting, no "just a little more")... and still needed "help" at the end to resolve a shoulder dystocia. Some day I'd love to simply breath out a babe but, well, that doesn't seem to be the way it works for me!

Oh, yes, thanks for pointing that out. Of course there are issues that can make it necessary for a mama to work harder to get the babe out. I think the midwife just meant that under normal circumstances, barring something like shoulder dystocia or malpositioning, that the body will evacuate the baby itself. It sounds funny to say it that way, but that's really what it felt like.

[Goatriffic]

Coming out of the woodwork to thank everyone for this thread. I noticed my prolapse a few days after my 4th baby was born, 5 weeks ago. She was my biggest, 10lbs5oz, and I wonder if that contributed to the problem. I think I probably had a very mild cystocele before her but now I feel like I'm walking around with a baseball up there all the time. I'm fairly certain I have a cystocele and a rectocele. I haven't seen anyone about it yet because surgery isn't an option for me now, even if I did decide I wanted it.

I've rested as much as possible since she was born. We pretty much hung out in bed and relaxed for the first 3 weeks. And I'm still taking it easy. But it doesn't seem to be getting better and I'm so angry. I know I probably shouldn't be but I am. I hate the way this feels. I hate that I can't do things that I want to do because I'm worried I'll make it worse. I hate that it bothers me so much. I hate that I have to ask for help to do things that I didn't even think twice about before, like lifting laundry baskets. I feel hopeless and depressed a lot and I don't really have anyone irl to talk to about this that understands. But I do feel better knowing I'm not alone, so thank you for this thread. The Whole Woman site is giving me some hope that maybe some day I won't think about my vagina all day long.

[Birth&Bunnies]

Directed pushing is so awful for your body! I can't stand seeing birth programs and them counting "ok now (watch monitor) PUSH 1,2,3...." Even a mama with an epidural can 'labor down' and be helped into a more upright position to avoid directed pushing.

[ecoteat]

I'm really perplexed about the pushing thing. I think when I was in labor I thought I was just trying to stay open, when in fact I was bearing down way too soon. My MWs didn't tell me what to do at all--they were wonderfully supportive, yet very hands-off. I am extremely happy about my birth experience with them. But now I'm starting to wonder: If I WAS actually pushing too soon, wouldn't they have noticed? Shouldn't they have said something? There was no point in my labor when I specifically felt a change; I never felt the urge to push. Everything just got gradually more and more intense until dd's head popped out just before her whole body slipped out with my next breath. Did I do this to myself? I'm upset with myself that what was a perfect and beautiful pregnancy and birth (or so I thought) led to what may be a rectocele and subsequent future duscussions of surgery, or avoiding it, or other treatments. If this is in fact a prolapse (I see the dr. Wed), I'll feel betrayed by my body--everything else worked so well in my childbearing year; why not this?

[wombatclay]

hugs ecoteat...I'm so sorry. It sounds like you weren't pushing "too soon". You were listening to and going with your body. You didn't do this to yourself, you didn't mess up, you didn't do it wrong. It stinks, and it's not fair, and it's normal to mourn... but this really is just something that happens and sometimes it just isn't anyone's "fault". Like stretch marks. Sometimes you do everything "right" and it doesn't matter.

hang in there mama...

[Goatriffic]

Originally Posted by wombatclay

It stinks, and it's not fair, and it's normal to mourn... but this really is just something that happens and sometimes it just isn't anyone's "fault".

This is a hard one for me. I planned a very hands off homebirth and got exactly what I wanted, in a good way. I pushed too early I think, not because I was directed to but because I wanted to be done and I wanted to meet my baby girl and I wrongly assumed she'd be born quickly once I started pushing. Now I'm wondering if it's my fault, if I did this to myself. And I'm so mad that vaginas can "fail" with normal use. I have only ever used my vagina for its intended purposes and now I feel broken.
I know logically that I'm not and I know I need to move past this anger into acceptence so that I can work on making things better. Knowing all that doesn't make it easier to do.

[ecoteat]

Originally Posted by Goatriffic

This is a hard one for me. I planned a very hands off homebirth and got exactly what I wanted, in a good way. I pushed too early I think, not because I was directed to but because I wanted to be done and I wanted to meet my baby girl and I wrongly assumed she'd be born quickly once I started pushing. Now I'm wondering if it's my fault, if I did this to myself. And I'm so mad that vaginas can "fail" with normal use. I have only ever used my vagina for its intended purposes and now I feel broken.
I know logically that I'm not and I know I need to move past this anger into acceptence so that I can work on making things better. Knowing all that doesn't make it easier to do.

Did you sneak into my brain? Or my birth pool 15 months ago? I'm glad I'm not the only one that feels like this, but I just can't get over the feeling that my body broke too. Isn't there some kind of warranty on vaginas and rectums? It sucks. I hope when I see the dr. tomorrow I find out it's not as bad as I think it is (which actually isn't nearly as bad as it could be), but I'm not getting too optimistic yet. She is a surgeon, after all.

[wombatclay]

Trust me...I know the feeling. It took me almost a year to recover emotionally/psychologically from my c/s and really it's still an ongoing battle almost 3 years later.

And this tear/prolapse...if it weren't for the absolute high of the vbac I know I would be in a much harder position emotionally. As it was I spent a lot of time crying on DH's shoulder about how my body was/is broken. I mean come on...a c/s AND shoulder dystocia AND a 4th degree tear AND a prolapse? Obviously I am just not "made" to give birth no matter what the natural living mama in me wishes were true.

Sigh.

But I think it's important to remember that no matter what you feel in a given moment, the truth is none of this is your fault. It took me a year in therapy to come to that place after my c/s...and this time I'm trying to just keep that thought front and center when my mood starts turning down.

[happy2bamama]

Originally Posted by Goatriffic

Coming out of the woodwork to thank everyone for this thread. I noticed my prolapse a few days after my 4th baby was born, 5 weeks ago. She was my biggest, 10lbs5oz, and I wonder if that contributed to the problem. I think I probably had a very mild cystocele before her but now I feel like I'm walking around with a baseball up there all the time. I'm fairly certain I have a cystocele and a rectocele. I haven't seen anyone about it yet because surgery isn't an option for me now, even if I did decide I wanted it.

I've rested as much as possible since she was born. We pretty much hung out in bed and relaxed for the first 3 weeks. And I'm still taking it easy. But it doesn't seem to be getting better and I'm so angry. I know I probably shouldn't be but I am. I hate the way this feels. I hate that I can't do things that I want to do because I'm worried I'll make it worse. I hate that it bothers me so much. I hate that I have to ask for help to do things that I didn't even think twice about before, like lifting laundry baskets. I feel hopeless and depressed a lot and I don't really have anyone irl to talk to about this that understands. But I do feel better knowing I'm not alone, so thank you for this thread. The Whole Woman site is giving me some hope that maybe some day I won't think about my vagina all day long.

I just wanted to give you hope that it will get better for you. You are only 5 weeks PP and for me, that was when I felt my prolapse the most. I didn't even know what it was at first, I just thought I had a stubborn clot that wouldn't pass (sorry TMI).

Around 4 months PP, I saw a physical therapist who specializes in the pelvic floor and she did the most thorough pelvic exam on me ever. She inserted her finger(s) in my vagina and then told me to flex certain muscles and she could tell which tendons and muscles inside me were tight and/or out of whack and then after the exam, we did specific exercises based on that - whoa!! She diagnosed me with a grade 1 uterine prolapse. I was so elated by that because to me, it felt like my entire uterus was going to fall out, so to hear "grade 1" gave me hope.

I am now almost 8 months PP and I rarely, if ever, feel the prolapse at all. What I feel more is a little, annoying hemmerhoid that won't go away (sorry again TMI)! I imagine (and hope) that as time goes on your prolapse will heal more and more. Hopefully you have a similar case, but either way, regardless of if you have a grade 1 or a grade 10 prolapse, time is the great healer (and kegels too!) and you are only at the beginning, so don't lose hope quite yet. I know it's hard to think that though when you just want to feel vibrant and not broken.

[nicoley73]

I felt broken. I was so angry at my body for letting me down. I was resentful of all the other moms who seemingly had no problems postpartum. But, my mom and dh always had total confidence that I would heal. And I went to physical therapy, which made me feel more in control of my healing. My PT also had confidence that I would be fine. I'm now 4.5 mos pp and only feel the prolapse if I've slacked off on my exercises. At 2 weeks pp my cervix was coming out my vagina. There is hope. And (unfortunately) there are lots of us out there, so don't feel alone.

[threadbey]

oh, thank you for this thread and i'm so glad i found it!

i'm more than 5 months pp now and my prolapse isn't giving me serious issues anymore (although a few annoyances i've had - not peeing completely at one go, random backache - i didn't know until reading here were prolapse related).

but i think the biggest issue for me is psychological! i took good care of myself during pregnancy, exercise, yoga, etc. and i've always been healthy, anyway. the birth was perfectly normal - about 11 hours after my water broke, only 45 min of pushing, normal position and everything. then a few days later, i was using the bathroom and washing myself off and SAW my cervix hanging out of me! it was horrifying.

thankfully, my mw didn't think it was a major issue and i only thought i'd need surgery for the 10 min it took to get her on the phone

but i still feel really a little embarrassed by the prolapse issue and i can't figure out why. it doesn't help that my mother was shocked by the idea and told everyone that i was in bed because my "insides were falling out"! or that my mil did research on it and found that only "old" women or "out of shape" women or women with "long, difficult labors" or women with MANY children get prolapse... so i'm still here thinking "what's wrong with ME?" and wondering about future children.

anyway, i'm glad to find you. i'm subbing. i'll read the previous several pages and come back.

[threadbey]

Originally Posted by Zoo Loo Naturals

Oh, I wanted to ask how your sex lives are affected? How your partners might feel about your changed vagina? Anyone think sex as exercise might be beneficial?

had to respond here. i was nervous about how i would feel and how dh would feel. he says he can't tell any thing's different i was a little uncomfortable the first few times, but it's great now - as good as pre-baby, i'd say. i do have to essentially do a kegel at the same time... and, YES, i think it's good exercise!

[threadbey]

Originally Posted by wombatclay

Birth culture- I'm afraid the modern "natural birth" movement plays into this as well. Women want to demonstrate that birth is natural, that it's not something the med pros need to interfere with, that women are made to birth. So hours or even minutes after birth women try to be up and about to "prove" this (ignoring or "forgetting" the rest element that surrounded natural birth for hundreds of generations).

... It makes me wonder sometimes...I'm 100% in favor of natural birth and belive passionately in birth and in women's abilities, but sometimes I wonder if natural birth without the recovery support system is doing more harm then good for women's health. Again, no quick fixes or easy answers, just another example of the complex disfunction of modern times.

i don't know wheather i was "proving" something, or if i just believed the sales pitch - that i'd feel fine and dandy afterwards if i did it at home with no drugs and no episiotomy. i DID feel fine - but it caught up with me. i was up and about too much. not a lot. but too much. next time around i am going to set things up so i have a real lying in and try to enjoy it (rather than going "omg - i can see my cervix!" and then imprisoning myself in bed for 2 weeks...) i think if everyone knows that's what i'm doing, it will be better.

i also think that being told "take it easy for a while" just made me think "do whatever i want to do". i completely agree with pp that had anyone said anything about pop as a possible result of too much activity, i would have behaved differently!!!! i thought it was all about my comfort and happiness. had no idea there were long term consequences

it also seriously pisses me off that people (myself included) don't talk about post-partum issues. gory birth stories galore, but they all end with the impression that by a few days later, everything was fine (despite c/s, forceps, whatever...) which i just can't believe is the case.

Originally Posted by ecoteat

I'm really perplexed about the pushing thing. I think when I was in labor I thought I was just trying to stay open, when in fact I was bearing down way too soon. My MWs didn't tell me what to do at all--they were wonderfully supportive, yet very hands-off. I am extremely happy about my birth experience with them. But now I'm starting to wonder.... feel betrayed by my body--everything else worked so well in my childbearing year; why not this?

agree completely. i don't think i pushed too soon, but... i didn't ever feel an *overpowering* urge to push... but i wanted it over! i'll never know what the reasons for my prolapse were. probably a combo of lots of things.

Originally Posted by nicoley73

I felt broken. I was so angry at my body for letting me down. I was resentful of all the other moms who seemingly had no problems postpartum.

same here. but i do wonder if they all really don't have problems...

i'd love to see a good pt. not going to happen for a while, though. :

i've been trying to kegel - seemed very helpful at first, but not so much anymore. also doing crunches - oops. mw told me to! i'll check out that site next...

[pamamidwife]

i have a cystocele and rectocele but have never had issues w it. i have always been told that its pretty normal after preg...and a large majoritry of women i have seen have at least one.

i know docs like to recommend surgery or hysterectomy for this, which makes me sick.

i blame our sedentary lifestyles as the #1 reason why this happens. forced pusahing comes a close 2nd. thoughts?

sorry,nak

[Goatriffic]

i was nervous about how i would feel and how dh would feel. he says he can't tell any thing's different i was a little uncomfortable the first few times, but it's great now - as good as pre-baby, i'd say.

That gives me hope. Since meeting my current husband 2 years ago my sexuality has become an important part of my life. It's become something I look forward to and enjoy whereas before him it was a chore. Since discovering my prolapse I've worried a lot that I'll never be able to enjoy sex again. How can I enjoy sex when all I can think about is my bladder falling out of my vagina? And I worry that my Dh won't be satisfied anymore. Since things are so different to me how can he not feel a difference, kwim?

Here's a really embarassing question that I can't believe I am asking but here goes. Since my prolapse air gets trapped up there and inevitably comes out making a very embarassing noise. Please, please tell me I'm not the only one. During the day it doesn't bother me so much because I can just blame it on the kids. But I would be mortified if this happened during sex. It's bad enough that I feel like I have to hold my insides in and can't empty my bladder or bowel all the way. Now I have to worry about vaginal farts too? This is when I either laugh until I cry or cry until I laugh.

[pamamidwife]

goatriffic,you are NOT the only one.