Good Parents,
Do your multiples show any symptoms of being scared of close contact? My 13 month old MZ daughters both (one a bit more than the other) avoid eye contact at close distance, like in my arms, and have terror-like episodes a couple of times a week with their backs arched, tearless screaming with eyes squeezed shut, and pushing against me with all their might to get away.
I have found support through Parent Leadership (http://www.parentleaders.org/) to help the girls work through their fears by listening supportively to their crying while reassuring them that whatever scared them is over and will not happen again. Every time one has the crying episode described above, I hold her and encourage her to feel all those fearful feelings while firmly held safe in my arms. I have seen some success, such as more eye contact and fewer episodes. After each episode, the girl will finally stop fighting to push away and hug me furiously with big hot tears streaming down her face. Afterward, she will usually fall asleep and wake up completely cheerful and extra warm toward me.
The question is, could they have this reaction because they were so crowded in the womb? And being MZ, one had a better connection to the placenta and was larger but she is the one who seems most terrified of closeness.
Let me explain that both girls are cheerful, energetic, bright, loving and warm. The episodes come on like a bad dream. I am looking for any common ground with other multiples' moms. Anything like this happening with your kids?
Curiously,
Curly Top
Do your multiples show any symptoms of being scared of close contact? My 13 month old MZ daughters both (one a bit more than the other) avoid eye contact at close distance, like in my arms, and have terror-like episodes a couple of times a week with their backs arched, tearless screaming with eyes squeezed shut, and pushing against me with all their might to get away.
I have found support through Parent Leadership (http://www.parentleaders.org/) to help the girls work through their fears by listening supportively to their crying while reassuring them that whatever scared them is over and will not happen again. Every time one has the crying episode described above, I hold her and encourage her to feel all those fearful feelings while firmly held safe in my arms. I have seen some success, such as more eye contact and fewer episodes. After each episode, the girl will finally stop fighting to push away and hug me furiously with big hot tears streaming down her face. Afterward, she will usually fall asleep and wake up completely cheerful and extra warm toward me.
The question is, could they have this reaction because they were so crowded in the womb? And being MZ, one had a better connection to the placenta and was larger but she is the one who seems most terrified of closeness.
Let me explain that both girls are cheerful, energetic, bright, loving and warm. The episodes come on like a bad dream. I am looking for any common ground with other multiples' moms. Anything like this happening with your kids?
Curiously,
Curly Top
She is definitely trusting me more and letting me in. She has such beautiful eyes!
)
