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What the *bleep* am I going to do with this?*Update* pg 4 - Page 4

post #61 of 93
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hoopin' Mama View Post
I do take issue with Hummers, but honestly I wouldn't care if it said Prius on it. It's not safe for a 2yr old IMO, and we don't have the space. Not to mention, I am actively trying to reduce the amount of plastic that moves through our lives. I'm not a purist. I didn't say anything about the gigantic plastic pirate ship/toybox they bought him that now resides in ds' bedroom.

Dh pulled the TIME OUT letters of the bench, painted it, and now it sits on the patio for ds. I don't know where the paddle went, but for a while ds used it to hit balloons around.

I don't think they do it on purpose to bug me, but they do also know I don't like it. When they told me about it, stepFIL started the conversation laughing and saying "You're really going to hate us for this -- guess what we got him?"

I am going to have an honest, gentle, conversation with MIL and explain my concerns and why it should stay at their house. I won't even bring up the Hummer issue because they already think I'm : Or as she puts is "we know how you are".

If they insist on bringing it here, then I will insist that battery be removed before it arrives so ds does not see it move. Once he sees that it moves, it's all over. They are excited to see him drive it, so I think that will settle the problem.

Regardless of my feelings, I try real hard not to deprive them of having fun with my child. But the size of this makes it a little exceptional. I usually try to keep the peace.
You know that when thay saw that, and saw how low it was priced, they said to each other, "she's gonna hate this" and gleefully bought it.

Just wondering (half-joking here) what do you think would happen if you were to be as cavaleir about their feelings as they seem to be about yours. or your preferences... I mean, what if you said:
  1. "You're gonna hate me for this, I know, but I sold that Hummer on eBay and donated half the $ to the Biodeisel folks! The other half was used to go on a picnic in the woods. Ha ha!"
  2. "I know you're gonna hate me for this, but the only way ds will get the joy of riding that sucker is at your house... (laughing, smiling benignly) Bring it here, and I can't promise he'll even know it exists... Ha ha!"

Would they laugh with you and say, "That's ok dear! We'll keep it at our place."?
post #62 of 93
Boy do you have a good heart for putting up with your ILs--especially when they make comments regarding that they 'know how you are'.
WTH?
This will make you laugh--dh bought dd (who is 5-not 2--that's too young) one of those things but it's a pink jeep (he drives a jeep as his transportation).
One day, dd had a pink plastic phone in one hand that rings until you 'answer' it and she was driving pink plastic jeep and trying to 'pretend' talk on the phone with the other hand...as she was riding around in the back yard dh yelled: hang up the phone and watch where you are going! And just then she hit a tree. She wasn't injured, we have the jeep set on the slowest setting and the yard is thick brush and sand--but the look on her face was priceless--phone in hand, hitting a tree. I certainly hope this is not in our future! It won't be so funny then--but it was funny in the moment.
I agree with all the other posters who say leave it granny's--especially since ds is so young. And like others, my dd is over the jeep and rarely even looks at it--it is now in the garage covered with beach stuff (towels, etc.).
Like you, I wasn't thrilled about it--but it did come from a garage sale and the thrill didn't last long--and it will soon be back in another yard sale, I'm sure.
post #63 of 93
Thread Starter 
Dh said he has been dropping hints to the family that the Hummer is not coming here.

Meanwhile, they came down this past weekend. When they mentioned the Hummer, I told them my concerns. They said he is definitely getting it for his third birthday, he will be old enough then (birthday is 3 months away). I told them then there are two choices: It can stay here with no batteries, and he can have fun just pretending to drive, or it can stay at their house and we can leave the battery in and he can drive it on their streets when we visit.

So, the ball's in their court I guess.

On a side note: My MIL brought me a Dobson book, Dare To Discipline. My immediate reaction was honest and strong, somewhere along the lines of "I cannot have that book in my house!"
MIL did not take offense, and said that it was her copy from when dh was little, but I am up on current stuff, so I know best Definitely a break through, and we had a good honest conversation.

Dh, on the other hand, knows how to use his dry wit. His comment was "oh, this must be what Dad read before he started hitting us.". MIL can't stand her ex-husband and thinks he is mean, so I think it hit home.
post #64 of 93
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by grahamsmom98 View Post
And, if you son't like it for your child at your place, don't be a hypocrit and allow it at their place. Don't want your child to have the toy? Then don't allow him to have it anywhere.
BTW, how dare you call me a hypocrite for trying not to create drama!

Maybe that's your style, but I'm a bridge-builder :
post #65 of 93
Totally OT, but funny. As to the question
Quote:
Have you ever seen one of these things move? They don't go that fast at all, even downhill.
the answer is....

Pretty dang fast when grandpa removes the "governor" that limits the speed. :

When we lived in the country the grandson of our neighbor had one of these. He was two or so, DS was three. That two year old could really drive that thing - my poor DS was hopeless, even controlling trikes.

Anyway, after the kid got pretty good with handling the jeep his grandpa removed the governor so it would go as fast as its little 12 volts would take it. Ralph Nader take that! :nana:

We moved and I hadn't seen the kid in a few years. Ran into him at the impromptu local 4th of July parade (the first since the civil war in this town, btw). He was driving a John Deere lawn tractor in the parade.

He's six years old.

We all come from different places. This kid was ready and able to drive that thing (and they had the safe place to do it). AND they kept it at their home! It doesn't suit me (space and the fact that it seems like the kind of toy that my kids would love for a while, then forget about until friends came over who wanted to play on it and THEN we'd be having a lot of "sharing" conversations because it would suddenly seem cool again).
post #66 of 93
I think once a person becomes a grandparent, they lose some brain cells and grow more heart cells.
post #67 of 93
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hoopin' Mama View Post
Maybe that's your style, but I'm a bridge-builder :
You handled it perfectly
post #68 of 93
Question: it only cost $20, so are they even sure it actually works? I just can't imagine one of those things, even used, being priced so low. I'd bet money the battery probably barely holds a charge and that's why it was so cheap.
post #69 of 93
I think the choices you laid out were very sound and fair. Glad to hear your inlaws were willing to listen to you. Especially MIL on discipline.
post #70 of 93
I think the options you gave were fair. There have been MANY MANY toys that when given to one of our kids and right away we said, you know this is staying here (grandma's house) don't you? And we would all laugh, and it would stay there. hahaha
post #71 of 93
I just am in awe of you and your diplomacy skills. If the dobson book didn't do it for me, the stupid time out bench and paddle certainly would have.

You are woman, I bow down to your awesome zen-like patience with these people.
post #72 of 93
Quote:
Originally Posted by Finch View Post
I just am in awe of you and your diplomacy skills. If the dobson book didn't do it for me, the stupid time out bench and paddle certainly would have.

You are woman, I bow down to your awesome zen-like patience with these people.
Yeh,after reading this thread I think I'm in love with Hoopin' Mama.
post #73 of 93
Thread Starter 
Aw, shucks :

Believe me, after many IL visits I've done my fair share of

I do think MIL has been trying to meet me on common ground lately. And I am learning what I can control and what I need to let go.

I get a lot of help from the wise Mamas here
post #74 of 93
I have not read any replies yet, but I had a very similar situation happen at our house. My parents bought a jeep about that size for my son when he was 2. I was livid....where was I going to put it, he is too young, how are they to buy such a large gift for my son without asking me, I would rather my son have toys that keeps him active versus just sitting, etc.

Well, you know what, my son LOVED it and once I saw how much enjoyment he got out of it I was so glad my parents bought it (because I never in a million years would have thought to purchase it). At 2.5, my son could drive it all over the neighborhood the right way and kept it right on the sidewalk. At 4.5, he still plays with it frequently. And the laughs that I hear when he is playing with his friends on it are priceless!!
post #75 of 93
The rule in our family is simple. You may give whatever gift you wish to my child. It is your money. However, if the gift is loud, big, obnoxious, or something I don't want in my home, then it will stay at the gift giver's home.
post #76 of 93
Hi

several posts have been removed due to their reference to another thread and discussing moderator actions.
Quote:
Do not start a thread to discuss member behavior or statements of members made in other threads or to criticize another discussion on the boards. Do not post to a thread to take direct issue with a member. If you feel a member has posted or behaved inappropriately in a discussion, communicate directly with the member, moderator or administrator privately and refrain from potentially defaming discussion in a thread.
this makes the thread confusing.

The rest of the quote from the UA is a reminder to PM a mod rather than post to the thread if you are offended by the way you are treated in a thread. That's what we're here for

Kelly~
post #77 of 93
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hayes View Post
The rule in our family is simple. You may give whatever gift you wish to my child. It is your money. However, if the gift is loud, big, obnoxious, or something I don't want in my home, then it will stay at the gift giver's home.
Pretty much sums it up doesn't it? I would also add that if Grand-Dad breaks the toy with a rubber mallet or a hammer or any other tool while trying to put it together the pieces are not going home with me for some non-existant garage sale. When will he stop?

Hoopin Mam, I am impressed with how civil and nice you are able to be in the face of so many 'ideas'.
post #78 of 93
Thread Starter 
Well, it's here. In all it's bright yellow plastic glory.

So, no one wanted to listen to me, the just popped ds in it and let him go. He almost immediately took down 90 year old Nana, and then they took the keys away. Why this surprised them I dunno, because I told them over and over again it was not a good idea to just put him in and let him drive it.

Anyway, he doesn't care about it at all. He likes getting in and turning on the radio, that's about it. I really don't think he will care if it disappears tomorrow. I think we will keep it a little longer then sell it on Craigslist, and give them the money. They are pretty strapped for cash, and I think we can sell it for more than they bought it for.

I wonder what is coming down the pike for Christmas? Dh told his Mom today to please remember that the best things come in little packages.
post #79 of 93
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hoopin' Mama View Post
Well, it's here. In all it's bright yellow plastic glory.

So, no one wanted to listen to me, the just popped ds in it and let him go. He almost immediately took down 90 year old Nana, and then they took the keys away. Why this surprised them I dunno, because I told them over and over again it was not a good idea to just put him in and let him drive it.

Anyway, he doesn't care about it at all. He likes getting in and turning on the radio, that's about it. I really don't think he will care if it disappears tomorrow. I think we will keep it a little longer then sell it on Craigslist, and give them the money. They are pretty strapped for cash, and I think we can sell it for more than they bought it for.

I wonder what is coming down the pike for Christmas? Dh told his Mom today to please remember that the best things come in little packages.

OMG. That is so funny. Probably scary for dear Nana, though!

I think your DH's gentle reminder for his family was perfect though.
post #80 of 93
Oh my -- what a let-down for the grandparents! The kid immediately does something dangerous just as the parents predicted, then promptly loses interest in the toy after allllll that build-up. I probably shouldn't, but ...
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